to not want to go to NY with a baby and a toddler

[saucetastic]

I really, really, really want to go to NY.

I wanted to live there in my 20s, but it didn't work out.

The reasons why i want to go to NY are for the jazz clubs and music scene, on and off broadway shows, cocktails etc...

DH wants to go this coming summer, but i think it's going to be a complete faff with a 6 month and 3yr old.

AIBU to "crush his dreams" by saying we should wait until the children are older.

Please feel free to tell me i've got NY all wrong and that it's a baby friendly city that will welcome kids at gigs with open arms...

Please. I'd rather be convinced and not be having this arguement!

If you can persuade a granny or hire a nanny to come with you and act as 24/7 babysitter then you may be able to relive your lost 20's in NYC. (Or leave the kids behind with same) But I don't think it would be much fun taking a 3 y.o to a jazz club or trying to look after a 6m.o after a skinful of cocktails.

I've just been to NY (with my parents, brother etc) with my 2.8yo and it was a bloody nightmare. A very wasted experience, it isn't baby friendly at all and I was told that by a long time NY resident before we went.

I'd wait until you can leave the dc behind. I think you will just find the restrictions frustrating.

Ooooo I'd go.I've wanted to go since forever.

I think you'll experience a side to it you never will again iykwim.I love travelling with kids and showing them the world.

However if this will be your one and only trip maybe not but if you're loaded go and do the grown up stuff next time.

If we had the money we'd take ours 6,6 and 5 in a flash.I see they're more mobile though. We did London from when they were tiny though and it was fine. Obviously I've never been to NY so maybe it's harder to get around.

I took DS and DD when they were 3 and 1 and we had a great time. There's lots of parks and we took them out to all kinds of places with no problems. Shows and gigs might be a problem though, although restaurants were all very welcoming.

Oh my word, I really wouldn't go to Manhattan with two small kids. I love NYC but I find it overwhelming, in a way that other big cities like London aren't. I cannot imagine adding a baby and a small child to the mix.

I'd done Manhattan with kids. Totally do-able, although no - you won't be having cocktails in smoky jazz lounges or battering the shops

Manhattan is relatively small and supremely walkable. There are parks and squares to explore. And I found NY-ers pretty family friendly to be honest. Food is also great, plentiful and cheap (as you know) so never a faff finding places to stop off for grub.

I would avoid the really hot months though (NAY to August!).

I am from NYC and think it is really baby-friendly because you can walk everywhere. That being said, restaurants, cafes, bars etc can be pretty crowded so you want to choose the right ones (Bubby's for brunch is v. child friendly).

You also want to pick the right seasons - August is too hot and Nov-March too cold for walking everywhere. I would go in June or September (probably September) so you can do outdoorsy things like the CP Zoo.

NO WAY!!!!!

ARE YOU CRAZY?

Ah now see, what you need is a 3rd person (friendly relative who adores your DC for eg) to come with you. We went over with our son when he was around 3 with DH's lovely sister. We took things in turns, so 2 of us would go out in the evening while the other would stay behind with DS (we rented an apartment so plenty of room). It worked during the day too, either we'd all go out somewhere together or 1 of us took DS to a child-friendly place while the other pair went somewhere else. It was fine.

Good luck, visit the Village Vanguard while you're there for me won't you?

Some very mixed views!

When i went on a very family friendly holiday when ds was 9mos I was completely knackered. I think dh may have forgottten how demanding it can be.

I don't think there would be another adult on the trip so just me and dh and the 6mos and 3yr.

OK, I guess it would be a case of managing expectations. Thanks for all your child friendly suggestions. I'll show this thread to Dh. More fodder for both of us!

I would find it frustrating to be in the Big Apple window shopping literally and figuratively. Especially, since he thinks this would be the only chance we have to go...

If you go on holiday a lot then sure take the kids to NYC.

However, I've been 4 times (not for 7 years) and every time I've been I've sucked the marrow out of the trip by staying up late and getting up early and cramming in as much as possible.

I go on holiday so rarely if I had a chance to go now I wouldn't even take 12 year old dd.

I would never go for my only time and miss out on seeing it at night.

It was handy having the Phil & Ted with us when we went as both DCs would sleep in it which allowed us to walk round all day and take them out to restaurants at night.

If you don't do things because they're not ideally suited to children, you'll end up doing very, very little.

We go on holiday to NYC every 3 years (DH used to live there and we have family/friends to visit) Sometimes we go alone for 5 days and my parents have our kids. But summer 2008 DD2 was too young for us to be happy to leave, (21 months) so we took them all and stayed 2 weeks. It was fantastic! It really beat my expectations.

We stayed in an apartment near central park, and played in there every morning. After a long leisurely lunch we walked to a museum or attraction (a different one each day and still didn't get round everything). DD2 slept while the rest of us explored. (DD1 was 6 and DS1 was 4.)

We got delicious takeaways from delis and sushi bars to have in the apartment in the evenings, then took it in turns to take DD1 to Broadway shows every other evening. didn't make any gigs though!

It was NOT a cheap holiday, though dollar was virtually at $2=£1 which made it not extortionate either; masses cheaper than London for example.

Agree with others, if you can only afford to go to New York once, wait a few years. But if you can afford to experience it with DC now and without DC in a few years (or with older DC if you have no-one to leave them with), then go!

Another quick thought - why summer? Its very hot for little children then (this summer was a scorcher; we got lucky the year we went and it wasn't too bad). Go in Autumn 2011 or Spring 2012 when your baby is a little older and weather easier.

yep - nyc lights ooh so purty

with a phil and teds could be doable... tho i was planning on a sling and maybe the old battle horse single maclaren for naps...

I really really wouldn't go to new york with children as young as this. It's an adult city, and i absoloutely love it for that reason.
I'd think about it when mine are teenagers though,- not far off.

Sounds lovely Checkmate. We'd be doing it on the way during a grand tour to our relocation on the other side of the planet. Our other stop offs have friends and family along the way so they would be more convenient with kids.

Being between jobs, means that dh can take a longer amount of time off, and once we're settled in our new place we'll be stuck in the mortgage trap again. So dh thinks it will be a final fling... though I think we could scrape it together at some point even if it's closer to retirement!

See that's what i thought curryfreak!

I live in NYC, and have done since my children were 4 and 2, and I also spent a 3-month period here when they were almost 3 and 1. There's lots for children to do here and if you want to come for a family holiday you could have a really wonderful time. If you're mainly interested in the nightlife you're not going to get the most out of it with young children. But I think it could still work. For example, nice NYC restaurants would happily allow children to come for early dinner. Hotels will arrange babysitters so you could have a couple of nights out at shows. Some museums are more interesting for children than others - MOMA is great for kids, Metropolitan Museum of Art is also okay.

I think it also depends on how comfortable you are in cities generally with your children. I moved here from London so I didn't feel it was hugely different. If you're from rural Scotland it will be more of a shock.

It depends what sort of holiday you want, doesn't it?

If you are thinking late night jazz and cocktails, then obviously it's not going to work with small children in tow. Why would you want to go to a late night gig with a baby? Would they enjoy it? Would you?
Leave them behind if that is the kind of holiday you want.

If you want a holiday with your kids, then Manhattan is a great place to go - the playgrounds in Central Park are varied and imaginative, there are plenty of hands-on museums, a great toy store and bookshops, zoo, boats, fantastic places to eat for families and it's easy to walk around or bus.

Oh I had a lovely 5 days in New York when my eldest two were 3yrs and 11 months. We stayed in the Beacon Hotel which is on the Upper West side, fab with kids as each room had a separate loungs with a kitchenette. Had a great time and did all sorts of things and saw all sorts of places we hadn't done and seen on a previous trip without children. Central Park zoo, riding the ferris wheel in Toysrus, little Italy was a favourite with my two - and at the end (or start) of the day we had the whole of Central Park to let off steam in. In fact, I'm plotting to try and go back now that number three is nearly four. I think it's one of the most child friendly city breaks we've done really.

I would save NYC until the children can appreciate it. Lots that is fun for 5 and over - but under that age, they just hinder you from what you'd really like to do, and don't appreciate what you can do any more than they would appreciate the local park / zoo etc.

My idea of hell is to spend a ton of money and then have to go to a park (even if it is central park) or a zoo.

DP has taken DS to NYC to visit family twice, aged 5 and 8, and they had a great time, seeing the sights , museums, and DS enjoys galleries, too.

No jazz clubs and cocktail bars, though, afaik

I was there with DS in 2007 for my sister's wedding. DS was 21m old, and in a push chair mostly.

I managed to get about NYC manhattan with no problems... until I went bonkers shopping one afternoon and arrived back at my apartment and then it dawned on me that I had no idea of how to get all that shopping, DS and the pushchair up 4 flights of stairs....

One of the neighbours helped me all the way up!

And that was how NYC was for me, 10 days of people being so wonderful, so helpful and polite.

I only carried DS (in his buggy) up one or 2 flights of stairs up and down to the subway. Literally all other times, complete strangers went out of their way to help me.

A few weeks later in London, the difference was sadly startling...

OK so I only had the one, it was September so not stonking heat, but he and I had a ball, used the subway all over, walked up and down the avenues and took cabs once or twice.

I would highly recommend travelling to NYC with small children. The children's area in Central Park is great fun!! there are parks and zoos to see, and FAO schwartz is fun for DC to go to see as well... though could be tricky when they are sightly older and just want to buy everything....

My stroller was a really rank one, cheapo from Argos, but it did the job...

How fantastic to be living right in the thick of it, alarkaspree. It's good to get a different perspective from a resident, as the only other resident view from Rockbird wasn't so encouraging. Moma does look fantastic. But by George, i could spend a month looking at those exhibitions.

I've given up on the Tates in London as i've found it too darn frustrating with ds treating it like a giant playground. I'm a sit in a gallery room for an hour kind of person. I am a city person, so I could cope - but want to relish it.

Of course if we went ahead with it, Merrylegs i'd have to manage expectations and not do the whole nightlife scene. As you know, it would be rather difficult to leave dc behind given our circumstances - and i wouldn't want to either - that's why i thought it would be better to wait till they were older. Could at least see catch a show and see family gig then.

The Beacon hotel looks fantastic alienbump. Thanks for the tip. Family friendly and it has it's own venue! That's def one for dh's arsenal.

That's true Blu, I spend most of my days at various zoos and parks, and would def want to find things that i couldn't do elsewhere if we went. Mostly to soak up the atmos - so Central park would be okay for the boating lake, but i wouldn't bother with the zoo (if i wanted to do that i'd go to the bronx one anyway). But we'll be going to other US cities also - so the experiences need to be really specific to NYC. Like walks through West village and Times square etc...

Lol at Littlemiss. That's some serious shopping. And heartening to hear that people are more forthcoming than in London.

I'm going to make a list of the things that I can do with the dc, and still have the quintessential NYC experience. Then make a list of the things i would want to do by myself. I just know muggins here is going to have to do the bulk of the babycare - but still excited.

Thanks for all your responses, very appreciated.