AIBU to offer this advice to not-very-cunning pregnant laydeees?

[proudnglad]

Ladies in early weeks of pregnancy who are attending social functions, take note:

The nano second you announce you are not drinking because you have a bladder infection/are on antibiotics/are on a diet that forbids alcohol, everyone will know you are pregnant then drunkenly hound you for the rest of the evening.

Simply say nothing, sit with a drink, pour it down a nearby plant pot or your dp's throat when no-one is looking. Better still, go to the bar yourself and order tonic with ice and a slice. Then no-one will know.

I say this as the friend of two preggy women who have been devastated at being 'found out' at two separate 40th birthdays recently.

Many thanks for your time. And congratulations!! x

Well I´m obviously odd because if I´m with friends & someone doesn´t drink, then that´s it as far as I´m concerned, no hidden agenda & I don´t give it another thought.

I would frequently have only one glass of wine on a night out & was never questioned on it or any hints dropped.

offer yourself as the designated driver.

i dont tend to drink anyway, so people wouldnt bat an eyelid if i didnt drink on a night out.

IControl I've worked with these people for 10 years. They know me & they know I'll have a wine or run & coke socially. So I can order a soft drink but then they will know I'm pregnant esp as you need a drink in you to survive a night with this particular client.

Feeling stupid as I'm the only person in the world to have believed that a woman not drinking at a party really was on antibiotics...

At a party once a (girl)friend didn't drink because she'd "had too much the night before and would drink a bit later in the evening". As her DH didn't drink either for the same reason we didn't suspect a thing!

To be honest, I didn't even notice when later in the evening her DH started on the wine and she didn't.

We were very surprised at the pregnancy announcement 6 weeks later, and it was a bit of a lightbulb moment when we remembered our party

Next time - I might just tell people I'm at AA.

This happened to me. I said I was driving to my friends 30th, she immediately said was I pregnant. I wasn't bothered about her knowing anyway but why do people jump to that conclusion!!

Could always have orange or coke and say there is vodka in it?

I went to a party when I was 7 weeks pg and I told people I had drunk loads the night before and wasn't feeling well. When we announced the news everyone was surprised, although in the pre-ds days I had several hangovers per week

I'm just astonished that anyone else notices or cares what someone else is drinking.

Well, I went for the driving and when asked why i was driving, went with looking confused and saying "isn't there engineering work going on this weekend? I thought the trains weren't running." When corrected, looked pissed off and mutter about getting the dates wrong. (Helps if you're a bit of a ditz when it comes to this sort of thing anyway)

also did the, just going to get myself a drink and not saying what was in it (just tonic water).

Another option is to say you're TTC so not drinking...

Or say you've had the squits and are giving your tummy a rest... Nobody questions diarrhoea haha.

I just said on the other thread about being outed as pregnant, the trick if anyone asks you if you are is to look really shocked and say "Are you saying I look fat??? I know I've gained a couple of pounds, but do I really look pregnant? Oh my god, I am never wearing this dress again!" Enjoy the look of horror as it spreads over their face...

I always like the 'god I'm so hung over from last night I don;t think I'll ever drink again - well not til next week anyway!!!' It also helps with the green look you may have through morning sickness.

Provincial - that was my original point. No-one will notice what you're drinking if you don't allude to it.

Findingmymojo, just nurse a glass all night, have the odd sip, don't say NUTHINK.

And maybe take your top off, do the splits, start crying, fall over, puke, start singing New York New York, just to make sure they have bought your act.

I think the thing is that if you're not drinking because you don't fancy it, you don't mention it to anyone and no one notices. But if you're not drinking because you're pg, you suddenly have this compulsion to make sure everyone knows you're drinking juice...or is that just me? I feel like everyone knows I'm not drinking due to the invisible neon sign above my head saying 'alcohol free zone' so I have to justify myself, but if I didn't draw attention to myself, they prob wouldn't notice IYSWIM.

By way of proving my point, last time i saw SIL she didn't drink. She could have said any of: I'm on a fitness drive to fit into a nice dress for a wedding in October/I'm the designated driver tonight/its a school night...all of which were true. But she chose to say "I'm on an alcohol free diet" so BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP goes my pregnancy radar!

FakePlasticTrees I love that one!

I am so pleased to have found this thread!

It's my 30th in a couple of weeks and i've just discovered I'm 4 weeks pregnant, going out to celebrate with friends and have no clue how I'm going to get away with it!

Am loving the do I look fat line though

Eh? I wouldn;t care or notice. I would like to think that the conversation would be interesting enough that I wouldn't notice what someone was eating/drinking/snorting etc.

Arrrgghhh Hammy, that's the whole point I was making - if you don't announce you're not drinking for whatever reason, no-one will notice what you are or aren't drinking!

Sheesh.

Still think my doing the splits, telling everyone they're your besht friend, crying, singing New York New York plan is the best plan to put people off the scent.

I found out i was pregnant the night before my hen do! I kne i was but i just had to test otherwise i would'nt have been able to drink and enjoy myself..

Went to York Races for ladieds day with 20 friends inc mum and sister and two pregnent friends and i managed to keep it quiet hidden ALL day!! no one had a clue!! I ditched soooo many drinks it was untrue, even did fake drunken dancing at the end of the night! i deserve an oscar!!!

lets just say there was a lot of explaining to do when i finally announced!

Findingmymojo, just order one rum & coke at the start of the night. Make sure as many people as possible hear you order it and add "Great, let's make sure we enjoy ourselves tonight!" for good measure.

Sip it once or twice (pretend if you have to). Go to the bar 15 mins in. Order a plain Coke. Make it last until you can get another plain coke discreetly.

Anytime someone is getting a round in, shout "Mine's a rum and coke thanks!" Then take it to the loo and dump it/leave it on a random table/the bar.

If you're tired, invent a phonecall at an appropriate moment from your partner/sister/mum being locked out so you will have to go and attend to that.

I think what gets most women found out is lack of conviction or doing it half-heartedly, feeling guilty as if they've got a big flashing "I'm Pregnant!!!" sign on top of their head. Act like you're not pregnant barring drinking the actual drinks. I find this works well, but then I love a chance to act

Hammy02: eating, drinking or snorting? Slipped that in and thought nobody noticed? You bad, bad gal.