Commuting Etiquette

[QueenSconetta]

QS's little book of Commuting Ettiquette

1. Please sit on your own seat, not half of mine as well.
2. Please keep your coat/scarf/bag/wet umbrella etc off me. I don't know where they have been.
3. Please do not put your bag on one of the only available seats then look at me as if I have asked to shit in your handbag when I have the audacity to ask you to move it so I can sit down. Unless, of course, you have bought a ticket for it.
4. Please do not stand in front of the doors/try to push your way on to the train when people are trying to get off. It is just a lot more efficient if you let people off first.
5. Please don't try and push me on to the train from behind with your belly while I am waiting politely for people to get off the train (you know who you are Sooty Santa Man).
6. Please don't play your music full blast from your phone, or so loud from your earphones I can hear every word. We don't have the same taste.
7. Please do not invade my personal space with your GIANT newspaper.
8. Please do not put your feet on the seats. I don't know what you have trodden in.
9. Please be polite to the ticket inspector. I know they can be grumpy and rude sometimes but manners cost nothing and they are only doing their job.

10. Please do not put your feet so far out in front of your that I can't actually put mine on the floor. Unless you are extremely tall and can't help it. 11. Please do not treat me with utter disdain and as if I have not spoken to you when I politely say excuse me as I need to get past you.

I try to stick to the above when I am commuting because its enough of a pain in the ass as it is, and in the main so do a lot of people. Do you think I am living on a different planet to aspire that one day everyone might be just a little more considerate?

Any others to add?

*now.

I have started commuting where there are 4 schools that use the train.
Wvery morning we get a parade of girls going through the carriages looking for a place where they can all sit together and they keep leaving the connecting doors open

Visitors and tourists to London: Please stand on the right. On ALL escalators. We walk up the left.
And at Heathrow, observe the same etiquette on the travelator.

Don't ask me to move down. the overcrowding is not my fault. These people are not all my friends. I am not having a party.

If my face is pushed into your paper because you refuse to put it away and make space, don't tut when I read it.

Oh, and received wisdom dictates that either end of the tube will be less crowded ergo you stand a better chance of getting a seat. Not so. Hardened commuters with long journeys travel at either end. Idiots those unfamiliar with the tube (and therefore more likely to be going one or two stops) travel in the middle carriages. You are practically guaranteed a seat within three stops.

DS2 started new school, 7 miles away, trial run, politely asked the driver to point to the school so he would get off the right stop, also the return journey bus stop too. Grumpily agreed, asked him the fare so we were fumbling around with coins,he moaned that we were holding everyone up, so we overpaid. When my son got there, yes, he pointed out the school but he didn't tell him where the opposite bus stop was, so he could come back. 11 yr old phones me frantically, can't find bus stop. Comes back, bearing in mind he has never used a bus on regular basis and definately not on his own, rings the bell but doesn't make it to the platform on time,so the driver just flies past the stop. I just cannot believe the unhelpfulness of the driver, this is a potential customer for at least 5 years, he was rude and impatient to my gullible, innocent son. When I used to catch the bus to school, all the drivers were lovely to me, some even letting me off with the fare! What has happened to them, they are just horrible.

1. Please do not share your farts with us.

We may not be able to hear it but that is no justification since we can smell it.

2. If we are all squeezed in together please do not snog, all that squelching in my ear is not pleasant. If I wanted a threesome I would not choose to do it on a train with all the passengers watching. And if you are that desperate stay in bed and do the job properly.

at "sneeze juice"!

I don't think Mrs T ever actually said that thing about public transport, did she?

"Don't ask me to move down. the overcrowding is not my fault. These people are not all my friends. I am not having a party."

melika have you complained to the bus company? I'd give it a shot.

Katisha, what's the point? I don't think it would make any difference. I know school kids are awful on the buses but this kid wasn't playing up or doing anything wrong. No wonder our roads are full of school run cars, they don't make journeys pleasant. Thanks for your concern.

By the way, he missed his stop three times in the first week of school!

Well the point is someone at the bus company has to reply to your letter/email.

When I complain to the train company (something of a hobby) it's not unknown to get travel vouchers...No idea if bus companies would bother but worth a try.

So many bus drivers are such gits with kids - it's like it's a condition of service. Katisha's right I think - nothing might come of writing, but at least they will have to respond and the letter will have to be filed and form part of their performance statistics (or something).

Why should it be the case to write in, they should know about customer care etc. You don't get treated like sh** anywhere else or you can walk out. Unfortuanately, we are a captive audience of National Express.

If nobody writes and complains then they are able to pretend that everyone is happy with the service.
It's unfortunately no good saying "they should know" - it doesnt work like that.

Even if you are a captive audience (as I am with London Midland and I laugh in a hollow manner when they say "thanks for choosing to travel with London Midland...) then you should still put it in writing that you are unhappy with the service.

At least it goes on record then.

This thread is full of very true things. These are just from my 5-hour train journey yesterday:

1)If you are in the quiet coach, don't look at the quiet sign and carry on with several loud, important phonecalls.

2. When someone politely asks you to stop, don't look annoyed and say 'these are important calls, love'. Especially if said person is a woman.

3. When the ticket man asks you to stop, don't say 'I didn't know it was the quiet coach', as the entire carriage will spontaneously erupt in derisive noise.

I hate sniffers, too. Yeuch.

Please stop engaging in hand-pole warfare with me. When I hold the pole, do not slide your hand stealthily down towards mine and lean harder, and harder on it till I move mine. And if you are victorious in this initial skirmish, do not then push your luck by moving your hand yet further down so that I have to move mine back up to the top again.
The reason I suggest that you don't do this is that there is a reasonable chance that I will one day cut right to the chase and smack you round the chops instead.

When asked on an easy jet plane by a 7 month pregnant woman if the middle seat is free (which it obviously is but you and your wife are trying to bag extra space) don't then move over to offer up the window seat only. How on earth was I going to be able to push past you and your wife to get in, plus I would have to push out again 1 minute after take off to go to the loo.

Melika, if your son is so unfamiliar with buses and the route to school, you would be doing him a favour, and all the other passengers, if you took time to accompany him on a few 'practice runs'.
I'm sorry he had a bad experience, but prepration, and all that!

Oh and please don't take any group of kids into the quiet carriage. I don't mean your own kids, we do that and then point to the sign and get 1/2 hours peace (relatively). But I was shocked to see a group of Brownies in the quiet carriage, with no idea they weren't supposed to be chatting (loudly).

To the gentleman just in front of me boarding the train; I would prefer it if you didn't do your gallant gent stuff by taking a step back and swinging your arms wide so that the younger attractive female commuters can get on and grab the last remaining seats whilst the crabby old grungey blobby bag behind you has to stand yet again. I'm beginning to take it personally.

mummytime - when you book online though they dont tell you its the quiet carriage so you cant avoid it.

also agree that obver the summer hols everyone should do practice school runs wth their dcs - its not really the bus drivers responsibility - though they can be infuriatingly grumpy...

And on the rare occasions when I have to use the train with my 14 month old in tow, please don't barge into me from behind and then pretend you didn't see the child on my back. Did you honestly think I was wearing a noisy rucksack that laughed and waved its arms around? You may think I am travelling around with a child for the fun of it, but even if I was, would that make it OK to squish said child to get your point across?

London tourists : STAND ON THE FUCKING RIGHT!
They should issue leaflets at Heathrow telling them this. They should also try to refrain form stepping off said escalator and stopping dead at the top for a chat/find my ticket, and walking down the platform 5 abreast so no one can overtake your snails pace stroll.

Please do not crack your knuckles. It makes me retch!

i live this every day so had to post...most of the daily annoyances have been covered except last week at 6.55am i was sat in the same carriage as a woman who took off her nail polish with remover and then proceeded to paint her nails...FFS