To think my BIL should seize on this offer?

[dilemma456]

My BIL has been unemployed for nearly 10 months. After numerous applications he's just been offered his ideal job in London (central somewhere) He and my sister live well out of commuting distence and they have a flat which they want to keep if they can so he needs to find somewhere cheap to stay while he's in London.

I was talking to a friend of mine about this and she said her sister has a flat in central London (Covent Garden) and they need to go away for 6 months so they are looking for someone to housesit / keep the place clean and feed the cat and would he be interested? She even rung her sister then and there and got her to agree to offer flat to BIL if he wanted it.

When I phoned earlier today he said he'd rather stay in a hotel.

An hour later my sister phoned in tears because his living costs in London were going to eat up nearly all his earnings so she'd still be paying for everythig. I asked her if he'd told her about our conversation and she said he had but he thought it was a stupid idea and I was just interfering.

So AIBU or just an interfering and overbearing SIL?

YADNBU - you made a kind offer and he was an ungrateful little tyke.

I would have snapped yer hand off for a cheap/free flat in Covent Gdn - how cool is that.

Can i have it please? I will leave DH and DS here for weekends!!

Ummm! Yanbu, but there must be more to this??

So he ca nget a flat for nothing for the next 6 months nad he doesn't want it?

Is he a complete idiot?

does he want the job or is he just looking for a way out of it?

My oh my, I know people who would jump at the opportunity. Ungrateful swine!

a free flat for 6 months and he turns it down??? Is he looking for a reason not to take the job?

Miemmniem - I suspect its about wanting to make his own way and being seen to be able to support himself. He comes from an extremely successful family who don't strike me a the sort that accept favours easily

Either that or he hates cats

YANBU - he sounds like a fool.

Um, if he has to feed a cat, wouldn't he always have to be there? Wouldn't that mean that he couldn't go back home on the weekends????!!!

And I may sound like a misery, but I would hesitate to accept an offer like that. I've seen too many instances of people getting stung with these sorts of agreements. If they spill something on a rug by accident, they are expected to replace it and it turns out to be wildly expensive, borrow something that turns out to be hugely expensive and can't really afford to fix/replace but never realised just how expensive it was, etc.

I actually rented (so paid!!!) a house off landlords who were on a posting abroad, and they were sooooo precious about their belongings I ended up being stuck for 2 months without an oven because they wanted it fixed instead of being replaced.

Actually chitchat these are good points. i still think he shoudn't have turned it down without at least thinking about it though

We offered our house to a couple of friends ( who needed to live locally as they were in between houses) whilst we went travelling for 6 months. Before we had dc's.

We were rather strapped for cash, so asked that they pay the electricity bill / telephone bill whilst they were there (no rent or anything though). Under a normal month it would only have been £60 per month maximum even with alot of phone calls etc.

They asked us for a breakdown of all our bills and mortgage payments!!! as in their words they didn't want to subsidise our trip. We decided not to let them use it as the final straw was asking if they could bring their father round to look at the state of repair of the house as they didn't want to be landed with any huge bills whilst we were away. I'd already explained MIL lived not too far away and would sort any pay for any issues if they arose.In the end DH rang them up and told them to forget the whole thing, and refused to ever speak to them again, we haven't!

Sorry, had to get that off my chest, but I think if your BIL doesn't take the offer he's rather silly but the offer may not be there too much longer!