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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be pissed off with DS's science teacher?

93 replies

teameric · 10/09/2010 12:31

DS started secondary school for the first time Monday. He was really looking forward to it and came home on the first day in high spirits.
This continued until wednesday, he was a bit quiet when he got in and I knew something was up. Eventually he told me that in his Science lesson the teacher shouted at him ....for scratching his nose.
I thought he was joking but apparantly, the teacher slammed his fist down on DS's desk and got in his face shouting at him that no fidgeting or scratching was allowed in class and that if he did it again he'd get detention.
Apparantly he shouted at another boy for something as equally stupid as well.
I have tried to downplay it a bit, and said that maybe the Teacher is just setting an example of how he wants the class to behave, but inside I'm fucking seething, DS was really anxious this morning (not usual for him) because he has Science again today. He's a good kid and wants to do well, I know his school days aren't going to be all plain sailing but ffs surely this teacher could have gone about it in a different way?

OP posts:

cumfy · 11/09/2010 00:20

Pointydog
Yes the supposed shouting-in-the-face-for-scratching-nose-/trivial-mannerism policy

ChippingIn · 11/09/2010 00:32

Has anyone else spent the entire time reading the thread trying not to scratch their nose...

...and been total unsuccessful??

Teacher sounds like a complete wanker tbh, it's no way to manage a class.

durga · 11/09/2010 00:34

I garotted a child for a silent fart today.

piprabbit · 11/09/2010 00:41

I spent three years worrying so much about being caught breathing wrong, that to this very day I have no clue about physics.

narkypuffin · 11/09/2010 01:55

It's shitty but your DS will have a lot more teachers than he's used to, some of whom will be moody. He will get shouted at for no good reason again at some stage. All you can do is help him realise that as long as he knows he didn't do anything wrong he shouldn't get too upset. The fact that the teacher did it to another child too shows it wasn't personal.

It's a life lesson really. Some people are arses but you can't always avoid them. Some have short fuses, some will be great fun but not very helpful and some might manage to forget his name past Christmas.

Obviously if it becomes a frequent thing then you'll have to act but until then I'd say to your DS that sometimes people have bad days and take things out on other people. It wasn't fair but life isn't always fair.

narkypuffin · 11/09/2010 01:58

Obviously as a mother you would be totally within your rights to go to the school and lecture the teacher about how awful he was until he's sobbing at his own inadequacies

whiteflame · 11/09/2010 04:32

when i started secondary i had two teachers who did this - one was a maths teacher who screamed at someone for smiling, shouting that there would be no reason to ever smile in her classroom, and the second was the technical drawing teacher who shouted at the whole class, that he didn't want to teach any of us, so if we didn't like his rules we could get out now (haha!!)

Although I was terrified at the time, those were two of the best teachers I ever had

durga that seems pretty mean! what on earth were they supposed to do, get up, go outside and fart?!

MmeBlueberry · 11/09/2010 07:50

I think it can be quite useful if the school and parents can make this pact:

Don't believe everything your child says about school, and school will not believe everything they say about home. Easy.

onceamai · 11/09/2010 08:32

This may have been a one off. We have had similar this week at new secondary school with dd. I'm going to monitor and may gently raise it at the first parents' evening with the head of KS3.

MmeBlueberry · 11/09/2010 08:54

With respect, I don't think it is your place to question how a teacher manages a class.

DinahRod · 11/09/2010 09:09

Teachers of smells & spells are always a bit odd, it's a law

MrsDoofenshmirtz · 11/09/2010 09:29

like snape

durga · 11/09/2010 09:32

Whiteflame I was joking. I did once have a chd removed from class for farting with intent

Astronaut79 · 11/09/2010 09:42

Farting with intent really is a pain in the arse.

MrsDoofenshmirtz · 11/09/2010 09:43

[snigger] at farting with intent.

YANBU it is a bit over the top to really shout at them in the first week when they are so nervous.

However, in my day they were still grabbing you by the ear, cuffing you around the head and slamming metal rullers down on the desk so at least we can be greatful they can't do that any more.

seeker · 11/09/2010 11:01

I have a friend who is a Year 2 teacher. She was offered year 3 this year and said no, because she reckons it's at the end of year 2 that they learn to armpit fart, and she likes to hand them over to someone else at that stage!

Galena · 11/09/2010 11:53

Having taught Y3 for about 8 years, I only had one armpit-farter. And he VERY QUICKLY learned not to do it in class.

whatwhatinthewhatnow · 11/09/2010 12:24

Have we considered that perhaps your DS was PICKING his nose, and in an attempt to tell you the story without incriminating himself, he said he was scratching his nose?

Original poster

teameric · 12/09/2010 08:15

no what, definately wasn't picking his nose.
Having had time to reflect I can see that he (hopefully) was just trying to set some ground rules and yes probably scaring the kids so making sure they behave in his class. (just to clarify this is a Catholic School in East London).
If it does carry on though then I fully intend to have a quiet word with the teacher...(after breaking both his legs for upsetting my baby )

OP posts:

CrunchyFrog · 12/09/2010 09:34

I don't think shouting in someone's face is ever ok. When I've seen it schools it has always looked like someone who has lost control, not someone who is gaining it.

MmeBlueberry · 12/09/2010 17:55

It's hard to imagine that the teacher lost control in the first week with a Year 7 class.

There are two sides to this story and we only have one of them here.

seeker · 12/09/2010 18:37

Bloody hell, I agree with MmeBlueberry!

RunawayWife · 12/09/2010 18:49

Speakl to the school head

theyoungvisiter · 12/09/2010 18:59

Sorry if this has already been mentioned (skimmed thread) but when we were at school, a popular offensive gesture was fake-scratching your nose with one finger extended - ie really giving someone the finger, but under cover of rubbing the side of your nose.

Very likely your DS wasn't doing that, but it's perfectly possible that he innocently replicated the gesture and the teacher thought that he was trying it on.

fascicle · 12/09/2010 19:19

CrunchyFrog said: I don't think shouting in someone's face is ever ok. When I've seen it schools it has always looked like someone who has lost control, not someone who is gaining it.

I completely agree. Last year my dd had a teacher who did this. We spoke to the head teacher to say this was completely unacceptable and she managed to get the teacher to modify his behaviour. Teachers should not be exempt from a zero tolerance approach to bullying. They should be setting a good example!

In the OP's shoes, I would speak to someone at school if anything else occurs.

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