to have thrown a hissy fit

[hairytriangle]

and then feel like a right arse for having done so?

I have mild pmt at present and I was at a work meeting, which appeared to be going over the same old ground we've been going over for the last two years (discussions about re-structure, so business focussed but potential for emotions).

So I got really frustrated after someone cut me off mid sentence three times in a row. Felt so frustrated I felt close to tears so I left the room

Now I feel justified in my reaction ... but AIBU to feel like crawling into a corner and licking my wounds, because although everyone else present has said it was understandable, and showing a bit of honest frustration helped to move the conversation on, I feel almost like I should not have behaved like that?

Is it a woman thing? or a self-esteem thing? or just a human reaction?

Actually I think you did well - far better than if you had broken down in tears, which is sometimes surprisingly hard to avoid once that midset takes place, and better than if you'd cracked the shits and had a full on rant or yelled - simply leaving the room, even if in a bit of a huff, is a pretty dignified way of protest.

It could have been a lot, lot worse.

YANBU

Bearing in mind that walking away to cool off is considered a more professional way of dealing with things than going troppo.

Don't feel like an arse, look at it as you time is too precious to spend going over the same tired conversations so you removed yourself to do something more important. They are the ones with no manners and nothing new to say. Whoever was leading that meeting also needs to exert more control and not allow the participants to be talked over. Not your fault at all.

Aw thank you sloany That makes me feel a lot better :)

The other thing is I'm usually not quite as 'assertive' as I was today, so maybe all in all it's a good thing that someone stood and showed how frustrating it all is!

Thanks Pheebe

You are so very right about the chairing of the meeting!

That doesn't sound like a hissy fit to me - more like a controlled way to deal with the ignorance of the other person in question.

I wouldn't spend any time going over your actions, it's not like you had a screamy fit, stamped your feet and demanded to be heard.

(as an aside I posted an update regarding my FW request for you earlier today - thanks again for your advice).

Ok, maybe I still have ishooosh with 'authority' and expressing my feelings honestly. I really need to get over that.

I am in a high profile job, with loads of responsibility and often need to face up to quite powerful people (some of whom - mostly middle aged men in gray suits - have said things like "off to the beach, are we" when I'm wearing a colourful, patterned top to work or "I'm not sure those earrings are suitable for someone in your position" (I have three piercings in one ear lobe).

ishoooos I mean. Maybe I also have spelling ishoos!

"everyone else present has said it was understandable, and showing a bit of honest frustration helped to move the conversation on"

I think that's the bit I would focus on if I had been in that situation. Although you felt close to tears, it sounds as though other people there read your response as someone who was as utterly fed up as they were but who actually did something.

Don't forget that there are two sides to a story - one of which is yours, which is the "emotional, crawling into the corner" aspect, and the other is everybody else's, which is the "hairytriangle demonstrated a pertinent and appropriate response to the BS".

As for the gray suits - perhaps you could respond along the lines of "you seem to have an interest in women's clothing and jewellery, would you like me to bring in some magazines for you?"

Aw, bless you huggly will you be my personal agony aunt/life coach ?

God I soooo wish I had thought of that response, it is genius and I will use it next time!!!! I sooo wish I was quick witted.

I've had a bit of a blub now, and feel better, I think I most likely have 'mid cycle tension' which I do seem to get, so everything seems more intense.

on the earrings comment, I do wish I'd listed in one great big rang all the achievements I've made and said at the end 'and I did it all while wearing three small studs in one ear lobe! Fancy that!!"