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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to want some help correcting my sons pronounciation...?

27 replies

NordicPrincess · 06/09/2010 13:05

Please help.

My son whos 4.5rys has started dropping his T`s etc.. when speaking. Its driving me mad.

His grand dad (not biological but whatever) is scottish and speaks with a really broad accent. He never says words properly and where my son copies his with his english accent it just sounds really nasty. I cant stop his granddad talking this way and i keep trying to correct him but he still keeps talking this way. I really dont like it it sounds awful.

What can I do?

OP posts:

Original poster

NordicPrincess · 06/09/2010 13:13

no ideas?

OP posts:

nickytwotimes · 06/09/2010 13:15

Yabu.

scurryfunge · 06/09/2010 13:16

Just make sure he exposed to as many people as possible so that his pronunciation develops. Not everyone drops Ts. Is he at school yet?

He has probably picked up on the fact that it annoys you too.

3Trees · 06/09/2010 13:16

Model how you want him to speak, get him to read to you, so he can see WHY the letters are important. correct him at home (in a light way)

And then...

Relax. he will inevitably pick up slang / poor speech habits away from home, wherever they come from. Just be confident that he knows the "formal" form, for when he needs to turn it on.

Olifin · 06/09/2010 13:19

It's a tough one. I think, short of sending him to elocution lessons , all you can do is just to keep modelling the pronunciation you would prefer him to use; rather than correcting him- don't make him feel his speech is wrong.

His accent may well change more over the next few years as different influences appear in his life; school etc. People's accents are a part of who they are and a reflection of their pasts and the people who have influenced them. Ultimately, they are something to take pride in, IMO.

Just a little point though- I wouldn't say your son's grandad 'doesn't speak properly' (and please don't say that to DS). He speaks with an accent! There's no right or wrong here.

Tippychoocks · 06/09/2010 13:19

My DD says "Wadder" for "Water" because she loves an american dinosaur programme. Correction (nicely) and repeating the word properly yourself should help.

Why do you think he copies his grandfather's speech and not yours though?

Adair · 06/09/2010 13:23

he is experimenting, it's good. Talk casually about different accents and ways of pronouncing words, mention it when you watch films - eg australian or American accents. Talk about how Grandad speaks and enjoy trying to talk like him (or film characters etc). It is not about correction, but you could say you like him to talk like you when he is at home/school and give examples (eg we say 'butter', don't we?). Try to keep it light and as a game - it's not really important.

And FWIW, no accent is 'better' than another. People do have prejudices and you can talk about those later.

nickytwotimes · 06/09/2010 13:23

Yes, the 'doesn't speak properly' bit annoyed me.
I do appreciate the desire to have your child speak in a way similar to you, but it is no more or less correct than any other accent.
So long as they know how to speak formally when required, then the rest is snobbery imo.

moogalicious · 06/09/2010 13:23

My son did this at about the same age! I thought it was dh's strong London accent influencing him!

I just gently corrected him by repeating the word correctly (rather than saying 'no, you say it like this'). He eventually stopped - he's 5.5 now, so it was very short lived.

Original poster

NordicPrincess · 06/09/2010 13:26

we live with my inlaws, and thats grandad too. He really loves grandad and copies him all the time.
When i say that grandad dousnt speak properly (and to my son i say he speaks with an accent, that you dont have so you should pronounce your words with their Ts) i mean that as part of his accent he drops the ends of his words.

Hopefully wel be moving out soon but it just sounds so nasty on a 4ry old boy, it dousnt sound bad coming from granded because he has an accent that it stems from!

Olivier starts reception class next week...

im already considering elocution lessons...im just hoping he grows out of it and quickly. He cant really read, well his name and a few other words so its hard to explain to him, plus i think alot of it is him jsut forgetting, i wouldnt put it past his to do it to piss me off either...

OP posts:

YouMightKnowMe · 06/09/2010 13:28

you souldn't be worried about pronounciation for the reasons that you are concerned....BUT you should be trying to correct him nevertheless because correct pronounciation will make spelling sooooo much easier for him over the next few years.

For example if he is pronouncing the word 'water' "wadder" then he is likely to spell it "wadder" if that makes sense.

So I agree that you should be correcting his pronounciation but not necessarily for the reasons you outline. And if you think about in the way I have presented maybe you will feel more comfortable and more justified in making those corrections?

Original poster

NordicPrincess · 06/09/2010 13:30

its hardly snobbery as i have said if he were scottish fine, but hes not. he dousnt copy grandads accent, just his pronounciation of the words-minus the accent. resulting in him just sounds like he dousnt speak very well.

OP posts:

YouMightKnowMe · 06/09/2010 13:33

As for how to actually correct hsis pronounciation - which was actually your question...

Just correct him calmly when he makes a "mistake". Maybe concentrate on a couple of words to start with.

For example one of the problem words with have with DD3 is "eat and ate" which she pronounces "weat" and "wate". We started by correcting her, and now if she says "can I have something to weat?" we look at her in such a way that she realises she has mad e amistake and will not get anything to eat until she has corrected herself.

That all sounds really harsh and strict when written like that but in reality it isn't and we are quite calm about it.

Original poster

NordicPrincess · 06/09/2010 13:36

you might know me, Thats what I have been doing so far. Its just really annoying!

I think itl get better when he goes to school as recently he has spent two saturdays with grandad while and I and dp have been working.

OP posts:

BarmyArmy · 06/09/2010 15:32

The word is pronunciation, actually. Glass-houses, stone-throwing etc etc.

Original poster

NordicPrincess · 06/09/2010 15:45

sorry breastfeeding at the sim time as feeding baby. hardly glass houses and throwing stones.

rather entertaining when most people on this site write YABU-

still dont know what that means

OP posts:

collision · 06/09/2010 15:49

YABU - you are being unreasonable.

I do not think you are being unreasonable.

I am from the north
Dh is italian

We live in Berkshire.

DS comes home and says 'I done this' or 'I done it' and drops 't's in lots of words and we just stamp on it all the time. I hate bad grammar and pronunciation and bad spelling as well so he will have to stop doing it or be miserable for a bit!!

MmeLindt · 06/09/2010 15:51

It means You Are Being Unreasonable, as that was your question.

I don't think that the OP is being snobbish. She does not want her son to drop the t's when he pronounces the word "water". I correct my DD when she does this. She has learned it from school friends, I think.

What does the misspelling of pronunciation have to do with it?

Original poster

NordicPrincess · 06/09/2010 15:53

i live in berkshire too!

I suppose it just something that matters alot to me. Hes been a bit better today, with some reminders !

OP posts:

collision · 06/09/2010 15:54

ooh where in Berkshire?

Have just discovered another Mumsnetter lives near me too........in Warfield.

Just do what you think is best and keep correcting him.

Original poster

NordicPrincess · 06/09/2010 15:56

I live in Reading, sadly! where are you? never heard of Warfield...?

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collision · 06/09/2010 16:00

Well my Mum tells people I live near Windsor whereas it is just in Bracknell really!! LOL!!

Ephiny · 06/09/2010 16:04

I'm not sure about the spelling issue - there are so many words in English where the 'correct' pronunciation doesn't at all enable you to deduce the spelling, we really don't have a very consistent relationship between pronunciation and spelling at all, just look at all the words (homophones?) that are spelled differently but pronounced the same.

And yes, it is 'pronunciation' not 'pronounciation', though I love the irony of people getting that wrong :)

Ephiny · 06/09/2010 16:06

"What does the misspelling of pronunciation have to do with it?"

Because it usually means the person mispronounces it as well, and mispronouncing pronunciation is funny!

Original poster

NordicPrincess · 06/09/2010 16:26

no i say it fine thank you. not much to do with dropping letters is it?

im glad yo think its funny. since you have nothing constuctive to say, you can jog on.

OP posts:

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