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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Noisy Neighbours - age make a difference?

19 replies

vaganova · 03/09/2010 23:07

The next door neighbours only moved in a few weeks ago (they're renting). They look in their twenties and are childless.

Every Friday evening without fail they have a gathering of friends and usually stand roaring and swearing and drinking in the garden just where the dcs bedroom is.
They are fairly quiet the rest of the time, they have a dog which whines during the day but I can cope with that.

Dh (who works away and doesn't generally return until Saturday morning) says I don't have a leg to stand on as far as complaints go, because our (pre school) children sometimes squeal and make noise when they play outside.
He thinks they are not being inconsiderate (as I do, they know we have young children after all), just being 'young'.

Oh dear, and now they've decided to play loud music. At least the children have managed to get to sleep now.

OP posts:

Skyrg · 03/09/2010 23:15

I'm 'young' (also childless, claiming right to mumsnet due to nephew and desire to have children eventually!) and we've just moved into a new flat. We always try to think about the neighbours, more important in a flat, but I think it's sometimes tricky with families with kids because they're usually in bed before we are so our TV/Stereo would annoy them more...

If you're inconsiderate, you're inconsiderate, age is no excuse.
If it's a problem, you could ask them (I would be horrified if I was annoying my neighbours/keeping their kids awake and would do my best to shut up keep the noise down), or you could talk to the council. If they're renting, not making too much noise at certain hours will probably be in their contract anyway, so you could also see if you can talk to the Landlord or letting agency?

Skyrg · 03/09/2010 23:19

Ah, also regarding the not having a leg to stand on, you DO. Your children presumably are making noise during the day. They're making noise at night, it's a totally different thing. Also, your kids are just being kids, whereas they're swearing and drinking, I think technically that would count as 'damaging' to your kids. (Bit extreme, I know)

Starbuck999 · 03/09/2010 23:21

I would definitely go round there and mention it to them. They may be totally unaware and horrified that they are keeping your kids awake.

However, it really does depend on the level of nuisance and what time it is as to whether YABU to take it further of they do not wish to comply.

It is summer, and kids do go to bed quite early. If they want to have a gathering every Friday night and the noise is from their garden and general people noise (rather than loud music I mean) and it's before say 11pm then there's not really much you can do except shut the kids bedroom windows. The kids in the rec ground behind us often stay out playing til gone 10pm int he summer (and fair enough it's summer, warm light evenings and all) and dd often mentions she can hear them playing, not much can be done really from general living noises.

If it's going on late into the evning and they refuse to co operate then I'd try calling the local police, or the council if they're council tenants.

ifancyashandy · 03/09/2010 23:23

I don't think you can get them on the drinking Skyrg.

Noise maybe. Drinking not so much

mamatomany · 03/09/2010 23:23

Is it still going on ? 11pm is the cut off point for being loud.

Starbuck999 · 03/09/2010 23:26

I garee mamatomany. If I have friend over then we always make sure the music goes off and we come indoors for about 11pm. Before then I can't see there is much you can complain about, it is their garden and they are entitled to use it, generally more so in the summer.

Skyrg · 03/09/2010 23:27

ifancyashandy (I read your name as something else entirely! Ifancyasha.. cough)
I didn't mean they weren't allowed to drink! I meant presumably it's affecting their behaviour and making them louder, more sweary inclined to swear. It can actually be quite threatening having loud drunk people near your garden..

OP, smelt any weed/seen any signs of drugs? That would probably get the council to act. I know it sounds extreme but our neighbours did similar things (very loud music in garden, drinking, shouting) and they were always smoking things they shouldn't have been, could smell it a mile off.

ifancyashandy · 03/09/2010 23:33

Wash your mind out Skyrg!

Really, you would shop someone for the odd spliff on a Friday night? I mean, I would get fed up with constant noise, don't get me wrong but I wouldn't go looking for 'extra's' to get at them with.

Maybe it's just me but a bit of weed really wouldn't bother me.

oldinboden · 03/09/2010 23:35

What can the council do?

Skyrg · 03/09/2010 23:38

Sorry .
And no, I wouldn't, we never reported them, but if I had small children I might have done. Also if the OP really wants to deal with it quick, that might shut them up!

The council are obliged to deal with noise complaints as far as I know. They do suggest you mention it to the neighbours first, but they will come and mediate if that doesn't work. Not sure they can DO anything if that fails (although they do fine people if it gets excessive I think), but just the threat may put the neighbours off.

I mentioned earlier about the letting agent/landlord. That might be more successful, contracts can be very strict about that kind of thing (it's in ours)

Skyrg · 03/09/2010 23:40

Must remember to read everything before posting..
'Maybe it's just me but a bit of weed really wouldn't bother me.'
This wasn't a BIT, seriously, it smelt like a whole crop of the stuff. You could smell it through our closed windows.

Starbuck999 · 03/09/2010 23:48

But Skyrg we don't even know from OP is the neighbours are having these gathering til late at night. If not, and it's 8/9pm ish (kids bedtime perhaps) then they are perfectly entitled to make reasonable noise in their own garden.

The weed smoking wouldn't bother me either. Up to the neighbours if they want to do drugs int heir garden.

Skyrg · 03/09/2010 23:58

Well the OP said evening, so I have made the assumption that they're not all going in quietly at exactly 10:59

TBH even if it is 9, they're still not entitled to make noise if it seriously disturbs someone else. Council will take it seriously no matter what time it is (we enquired about the regulations because our bloody neighbours were so loud), especially if it's affecting children.
I'm not suggesting calling the police or anything :) as you say it's their garden and they have the right to have fun, but I don't see any harm in asking them nicely to shut up.

It really does make a difference if it's after 11 though.

ccpccp · 04/09/2010 10:05

Its FRIDAY evening.

Remember how much fun they were?

Give them a break.

KarmaAngel · 04/09/2010 10:17

Age has nothing to do it. My old next door neighbour was in her 30's with 4 young children. She used to play music at club volume 24/7 with consideration for anyone else. My next door neighbours on the other side are a house share of twentysomething teachers. They have get togethers but are reasonably quiet.

ChippingIn · 04/09/2010 11:06

Vaganova - they're young, childless and have just moved in! Probably their first place away from home... give them a bit of a break. It's Friday nights, not everynight, it's only been a few weeks - the novelty will soon wear off and autumn will soon draw in.... by the time next summer comes - who knows.

If, however, they are still doing this in a few weeks time, then go and speak to them, nicely :)

Coralanne · 04/09/2010 12:04

Why did you feel that you had to add that "they're renting"?

Do you think that they wouldn't be noisy if they had purchased the house instead of renting it?

ChippingIn · 04/09/2010 12:45

Probably to give everyone the whole picture otherwise people would have piled in saying they have bought the house it's up to them who they invite over.... etc etc etc Also if they are renting there's the tennancy & landlord route to go down etc...

I'm sure it wasn't meant as any slight on 'renters' - unclench a little.

mintyfresh · 04/09/2010 22:03

Would also drive me mad vanganova but then I'm really intolerant when it comes to anyone keeping my DC's awake at night - it's hard enough to get them to sleep in the first place

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