Posted this in student parents, but hopefully will get more responses here.
I'm not a parent but DH and I are hoping I will be before the end of my course. I'm just starting the second year of my PhD. When I started, I agreed with my supervisor that I could do the course by commuting, since my then DP had just got a job in the city we lived in, and the research facilities are better there. I think it worked well, and I love the city I live in. There were downsides, and I know the department I'm attached to would have liked me to be more involved with life there - but to be honest, I'm not sure I would have been any more involved if I'd lived there.
My supervisor has now got a new job, and my new supervisor (though lovely), isn't fighting my corner so much. The head of department wants me to move much nearer to the university, which is 200 miles from DH's job (and my research). He thinks I need the community of students there, but to be honest, I have a perfectly good community here, and I chat with people over the internet too. I'm pretty sure the research community in my home town is better than the one at my university town, so I think he's being an idiot.
Could you tell me what you think of the situation? Are there advantages to living nearer my university that I've overlooked, or would you be happy to work long distance? Am I BU to tell the head of department he's being silly?