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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be irritated with these parents.

30 replies

xstitch · 30/08/2010 18:05

Through my marriage and subsequent divorce I developed a very bad habit of comfort eating and ended up morbidly obese (yes I know this was self inflicted). I have been to weightwatchers and have been working very hard at retraining my eating habits. I have also bee working out 3/4 days out of every 7. Finally last week I fitted comfortably into size 14 clothes. I was really starting to get my confidence back now that I am seeing results. I have no intention of stopping there as I want to reach my target weight and stay there. So I do recognise that I am still fat b**ch.

Today I teenage boy was dancing about behind me singing 'I'm a big fat bloater', puffing out his cheeks and making a ball shape with his arms. His parents were with him and laughing saying 'oh isn't he funny' I was so irritated by their reaction, I always try and teach my dd that it is rude to highlight the flaws of others. If she had done this to someone she would be getting told off.

OP posts:
abr1de · 30/08/2010 18:06

That is really, really awful. I am so sorry. I am glad you are angry.

And well done on your weight loss. Keep going.

lolapoppins · 30/08/2010 18:11

You are a size 14? Far from fat!

Although, I dieted down from a 24 to a 10 myself, and I felt massive all the way (still do somedays) so I know what it's like to still feel fat in your head.

The parents are idiots. I would have gone apeshit at my ds for being so rude.

FunnyLittleFrog · 30/08/2010 18:14

Yanbu. How horrible.

But, I am suprised as size 14 is fairly normal really - certainly not anything out of the ordinary. Sure it was directed at you?

Original poster
xstitch · 30/08/2010 18:14

That's why I was so annoyed lola if dd had done that to someone, no matter how big they were she would have been in big trouble and she is much younger than this lad.

OP posts:
prozacfairy · 30/08/2010 18:15

YANBU. My daughter would have got a very public telling off (which she hates) and would have apologised.

Hmm at anyone finding something so dumb funny- it's so unfunny you almost have to feel sorry for people hat they are so thick.

You've done really well you should feel good about yourself. Well done.

pallymama · 30/08/2010 18:17

I wish I'd been walking behind the parents, I'd have had a thing or two to say! Angry
Agree with lolapoppins, a size 14 is far from fat, and the parents are idiots. So no, YANBU.

nowherewoman · 30/08/2010 18:18

Please don't refer to yourself as a fat bitch Smile

sianyc18 · 30/08/2010 18:20

First of all well done on your fantastic weight loss. And a size 14 is in no way what I would ever class as fat.
The parents should be ashamed of their offsprings behaviour and of themselves.Agree with lolapoppins if I ever heard my dd speaking in that manner she would be in all manner of trouble.

OTTMummA · 30/08/2010 18:22

yadnbu, after loosing 5st a few yrs back i had a drunk twat come up to me at a cashpoint screaming, oi, oi, fattie boom boom. ( he was paraletic ) i ignored him, but deep down i was crushed to be so publicly attacked for my weight, i was a small size 16 at the time, and looking back, i looked quite nice.

one the other hand, i was in a shop the other day and a woman was with her 7/8 yr old boy who was in a wheelchair, he quite rudely pointed out and laughed at a small lady, im not sure what condition she had, but his mum was very cross, and made him apologise etc, and then said, ' how would you feel if someone started laughing at your wheels?!'
so there are good parents out there, don't give up.

Original poster
xstitch · 30/08/2010 18:25

I was the only other person there so must have been directed at me. tbh I would have been annoyed at whomever it was directed at because the parents should not be encouraging that behaviour.

OP posts:
pozzled · 30/08/2010 18:29

YABU to say you are 'irritated'. I would be bloody furious. Bad enough for the teenager to do it in the first place, but for the parents to encourage it... Angry

AliGrylls · 30/08/2010 18:35

It is really rude and really stupid.

Congratulations on your hardwork and weight loss. All you need now is the confidence to say "I don't care what people think, I know I am gorgeous because I feel it".

Zondra · 30/08/2010 18:38

This boy & his parents were absolutely rude arseholes & obviously soft in the brain if they think a size 14 is huge.
Not that being any size bigger (no matter how large) should receive insults & ridicule either!

Feel really bad that you had to put up with this today. I know it's easy to say,but, please ignore & forget about these idiots.

lolapoppins · 30/08/2010 18:40

Christ, I missed the part where you said it was a teenager, I thought you were talking about a younger child!

What kind of a parent laughs at a teenager for saying something like that? That's even worse than over indulgent parents of a younger child whonmay not have been taught better. A teenager should know better than to be so rude, crap parents or not.

5DollarShake · 30/08/2010 18:42

YANBU. Some people are cretins, pure and simple.

gobsmackedetal · 30/08/2010 18:45

WHAT??? YANBU.

My dd is 4 and already knows to respect other people's feelings.

She came back from nursery one day with a horrible pisstaking song (obviously made up by 3 and 4 year olds) about a fat woman who walks in an elevator and it breaks and walks on the bus and it breaks etc.

There was a long conversation for several things: a) pisstaking and hurting others, I tried to explain the concept of bullying.

b) judging people by their looks. Today is fat people, tomorrow might be people with big noses, the next day people with long fingers, where does it end?

c) although fat is in most cases of adults self inflicted and can be fought off, verbally abusing someone isn't helpful

you know what: SHE UNDERSTOOD!

Fact is, if I ignored what the song said, she was cute and funny and adorable the way she was singing. But HOW can you ignore it, isn't it our job to educate our children how to live harmoniously with other people around them???

FFS, I'm furious for you

gobsmackedetal · 30/08/2010 18:46

Gosh, I just realisd that my pp is huge, apologies, I'm livid though at how innept some parents are

Katiekitty · 30/08/2010 18:47

Wow, well done on your weight loss - god, I wish I was a size 14!

Do you still feel like you're larger?

What would help you realise how fab you must look? Have you been able to update your wardrobe with something new?

maighdlin · 30/08/2010 18:51

take comfort in the fact that if thats a "funny" thing to do they must have very boring lives and will probably always have very boring lives.

i can be a bit of a brass neck and say things to people but when its about my weight i crumble and want to run off and cry.

bunch of fuckers for doing it raised by a bigger bunch of fuckers who taught them to do it. Angry

ChippingIn · 30/08/2010 18:55

It's a shame you didn't turn around, look each of them in the eye, slowly and say something very cutting about their looks, dress sense or something....you know 'I am getting thinner all the time, you will always be ugly fuckers'.

People just seem to think 'fattie bashing' is acceptable and quite frequently on MN too :(

Congratulations on getting to a 14 though, you've worked hard! Don't let these idiots upset you!!

Marjee · 30/08/2010 18:55

Yanbu Shock I can't believe there are parents who encourage that kind of attitude! I used to be quite overweight myself as a teenager and I remember things like that happening all the time, it really made me feel like shit Sad. Size 14 is not fat, I thought size 16 was the uk average?

I would never let my ds behave like that, if he dared make fun of someone in public I'd tell him off in public!

You've done really well (as you know) to get down to a 14, feel proud of yourself don't let those fucking twunts get you down

StuckInTheMiddleWithYou · 30/08/2010 18:57

Congratulations on all your hard work - I wish I had your will power!

Anyway, I'd also take comfort from the fact that these "parents" probably aren't very bright. I'd rather be you than them, any day!

santander · 30/08/2010 18:59

Are you sure it was directed at you and not just a coincidence that you happened to be close by?? size 14 is hardly fat!!!!!

deakell · 30/08/2010 19:05

YANBU.

Should have called them vacuous, ugly cunts and left it at that.

However, I appreciate that this is easier said than done.

Well done on your weightloss and keep it up.

mmmperuna · 30/08/2010 19:09

What wankers - yanbu - but well done on your weight loss - size 14 is no way fat so please don't let these aresholes put you off

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