to whinge and moan, its just NOT FAIR!!!!!!

[JjandtheBeanlovesUnicorns]

your all probably fed up of me by now, so i shall just write a long ranty self pitying judgey pants post to make myself feel better.

My dp was made redundant last october, after a few years of pretty unreliable work our fianances were a mess, and we were under a threat of eviction from Housing association, being young and nieve, we believed they actually would evict us unless we paid arrears in full.

we now know theyd accept reliable weekly payments no matter how low.

so we have burned the bridge for ha housing.

we moved to a lovely house rented out by family but it was 100miles away, we thought this was our break, our fresh start.

wrong

a few weeks later my grandma who brought me up was diagnosed with terminal cancer. the medication and general shock has changed her so much its extremely difficult maintaining the relationship ive always had with her and it breaks my heart.

then a few weeks after that my baby brother died.

after staying with my mum a while, my ils decided to sell the house we live in.

i couldnt deal with another pile of shit so packed up mine and the kids clothes and moved into mums. dp has been fantastic and taken over all the other stuff packing and so on.

my lovely mum has squished me dp and the dcs into her wee terrace house with her my step dad, brother and sister.

we have now been house hunting 5mnths, and its a nightmare, so many people wont even let us veiw as dp is unemployed, he is severly dyslexic has a problem with his hips and it goes against him at all job interviews.

When we finally found a lovely house that accepted housing benefit and us, basically, someone else popped up and was a better risk than us.

now due to a farking sickness bug, making my pill useless, there is a chance i could be pregnant, got a faint positive (i will be overjoyed at a bfp, but so disapointed to bring a life into the mess we are in iyswim) im pretty ashamed of myself right now.

i know a fair few single mums, who left school had children and never worked and they seem to have holidays, treats and nice easy lives, but of course i know they are playing the system and there kids dads,

anyway ive found a truly lovely house on rightmove, and i have a feeling it will be anouther, NO HB!

dp is working his arse off job hunting, hes taken any training the job centre offered, and we see less of him now than when hes working.

i just want a home for my family, why will no one give us a chance.

people at housing options even told me being single would give me a home, i cant do that, its wrong.

where can i go for help, i feel like a total failure, fuck up and embarassed of myself,

of course the kids love living at grandmas and are happy as usual.

but i feel so depressed about it all, so much so house hunting upsets me, i find ones we can afford and think, well we wont get it.

so thats me complaining and whining, ignore me and tell me iabu, there are far worse things i could be dealing with yes.

im guessing most of that makes no sense too. i havent slept well for months, as im on the floor.

I'm sorry you're having such a tough time.

You've had some great advice on here, so nothing I can add there, but wondered if this site here might have anything for you?

Really hope something comes up soon for you.

youre council should have homeless centres where you can present yourself as homeless. take your kids and husband down there with as much stuff as poss, and tell them your mums asked you to leave. they have a duty to house you, they will no doubt put you in a horrible temporary homeless flat or house if youre lucky, that feels like the end of the world, but its a roof over your head where youre not cramped. and remember its only temporary, if youre not working you wont have to pay council tax or rent, and these places always have gas/electric meters. easier to budget and save for when you do get rehoused..., usually less than 6 months.

ive worked as a housing support worker for 6 years, and have been through this process personally with my baby. i was lucky in that although i got put in a damp ridden hell hole, after 5 months, i got moved to a beautiful tenement in my preferred city area :)

---------

Suffolk Coastal is required to provide emergency shelter for homeless people who are in priority need. In general terms this includes families with school age children; pregnant women; people with a disability (including those suffering with mental ill health); and those people above state pensionable age.

You are classed as homeless if any of the following apply:

* You have no accommodation available in the UK or elsewhere.
* Your family has no home where you can live together.
* You have a home but you cannot get in.
* You have a home but it is considered unreasonable for you to live there.

If you are homeless and need help with accommodation, contact the Housing Options Team on 01394 444237 or email [email protected]

also on the council website, they offer a rent deposit scheme

Landlords of privately rented accommodation may require a deposit before agreeing to a tenancy. The deposit covers the cost of any damage done to the property while the tenant is living there.

Some tenants want to rent privately but cannot afford to pay a deposit. Suffolk Coastal's rent deposit guarantee scheme helps people on low incomes to rent privately by guaranteeing to pay the damage deposit (equivalent of a maximum of one month's rent), should a genuine claim be made by the landlord.
Who is eligible?

Prospective tenants must be homeless or at risk of becoming homeless and able to provide evidence of one of the following:

* on a low income (qualifying criteria apply).
* eligible for Housing Benefit.
* unable to raise the full rent deposit by own means.
* have difficulty in accessing social housing.
* able to sustain a tenancy with reasonable housing support.
* must have a local connection.

Finding a property

Once the tenant has found a suitable property, he or she can contact the landlord direct, or contact Suffolk Coastal's Housing Options team, who will talk to the landlord on the tenant?s behalf, providing details of the scheme.

Prospective tenants must not commit themselves to a tenancy until an inspection has been made and all the paper work received and completed otherwise they will become ineligible for the scheme.

For further information please contact:

Housing Options
Suffolk Coastal District Council
Melton Hill
Woodbridge
Suffolk IP12 1AU

Telephone: 01394 444237
Fax: 01394 444743
Email: [email protected]

Some brilliant advice here Jjandthebean.

Just wanted to quickly add, if you're anywhere near Ipswich, I was housed by Thompsons estate agents who seem to only take on DSS tenants.

Best of luck to you all, and congratulations on potential new DC.

arses, we are very near ipswich, and its somewhere we have considered moving to, so i will look into thompsons straight away.

chippin,
we had a small talk, hes not a talker lol, i have a sneaking suspicion he knows who i am on here and read the thread, as he was too apolagetic for things i hadnt said had upset me, but hes been lovely since so fingers crossed hes taken it on board.

and i also cant remember who asked, re me working, dp is a bit of a mare, he really is a brilliant hands on dad but he cant do the full time dad thing, it drives him mad and hes so shy picking ds up from preschool would push him over the edge, it also doesnt help matters that due to having my dcs young i lack qualifications, i have tried suggesting me working, since hes the driver it would make life easier as he could drop me off and so on and take the kids out easier but i think i dented his male pride and he got very arsy about it being his job to sort things and look after us.

thanks for all the info bridals.

we have had a small bit of good news THREE houses have been listed that accept hb, so now waiting for veiwings and we will go from there, so cross your fingers for me!

dp has also got 2 interveiws for some part time driving work, one of which is almost certain, its only 10hrs a week, but its money in out pockets and alot of landlords will apparently be more likely to consider us.

and re the faint positive pregnancy test, it was faint for a reason, i have got the mother of all periods now to go with my flu so i feel rough as and have no idea whats going on with my body, for the best really i suppose.