in not telling DP about others opinions on his kids?

[sunshinerainbow]

I live in a small town.

DP has 4 kids who don't live with us all the time.

The 2 eldest are pretty good kids, the 2 youngest are lovely, but can be challenging.

I keep hearing things through other people about how badly behaved and ill mannered the 2 youngest are.

People who work at school and pupils who attend the same school have said how DSS is always causing trouble and constantly being sent to Head for fighting, or rudeness to staff. Some of which DP knows about. They have also said about DSD who is rude and arrogant and never uses any manners.

DP is not naive about his children, but we have been having "discussions" about contact time at the moment so the last thing I want to do is seem to be "moaning" about his kids any more.

its not going to achieve anything or solve anything is it - however now you are in the know at least you can support him in becomming a full part of his childrens lives and parenting them accordingly.

oh and neverallow amything to be said in front of you - if you don't defend your dfamily - (and they are now your family) it makes ou look like a twat

Are they 'lovely but challenging' or are they 'rude, arrogant, mannerless fighters'?

And what does 'discussions about contact time' mean? As in you want less and he wants more?

Sounds like there are some bigger issues here than just what others are saying about them.

Nah- don't tell him. People always have a view on other people's kids and as you have said, he IS aware of aspects of their behaviour.

Those with the most damning opinions are those who sometimes should take a closer look at their own kids.

Be as supportive as you can be of the children as I often think that kids are too easily labelled.

Dont listen to gossip, im sure if the kids are badly behaved, he will hear about soon enough from the school or his ex.