to put my 5 year old on a diet ???

[mummyloveslucy]

Hi, my five and a half year old daughter has always been very tall. She's now in age 8 clothes in order to get enough growing room. She's always been right on the edge of being a healthy weight for her height so we've never really worried about what she eats. She does eat a lot. Her diet is fairly limmited but fairly healthy, just high in fat. She likes rice cakes with penut butter. My husband says she'll eat 6 of these for lunch. (I wouldn't let her eat that many, I'd offer an alternative after 2). My husband tends to just give her whatever she asks for though. She also likes cheese, toast, bread sticks and homous, baked beens etc. I've recently been giving her Rocs organic squash as I've heared that artificial sweetner is bad for them. She won't drink water and dosn't like her fruit juce diluted. Recently though, she's put on quite a bit more weight. She is now overweight for her height.
I'm wondering wether it's the change of drink that's done it or a combination of everything. She does have ice creams, popcorn, sweets or some form of a treat every day, sometimes several times a day if she's being looked after by my MIL.
I've talked to my husband about our daughters weight gain and he thinks it'd be cruel to put her on a diet saying "She loves her food", and "She's not that overweight". I know that everyone has to be supportive, because if they keep feeding her what ever her heart desires when I'm at work, then it'll become a real battle. I'm not going to let her go hungry, she'll just eat more fruit and vedge and I'll swap her white bread to granary, because she dosn't mind it, and change her drinks to sugar free. She will be a lot more healthy for the change, but some how I do feel a bit guilty for doing it. It somehow seems wrong to put a young child on a diet. She can still have the odd ice cream etc, but it'll be once a week instead of every day.
I think I'm doing the right thing as she dosn't want to walk as far as she used to, she was always such a good walker but now she says her knees hurt. (I'm not sure if this is true or not)
If anyone has some tips, I'd be greatful or ways of helping my family to understand why I'm doing this and to back me up.

My daughter was overweight at seven and, like you, I didn't want to take her to the doctor's about it because she was so sensitive.

Instead, I rang the dentist and explained things to him, and when we went in he said her teeth were great. He asked who her favourite pop stars were (Spice Girls then!) and asked if she wanted teeth like theirs - he had photos there. He told her that if she did she must make sure she didn't drink juice or pop and that she only had one sweet thing per day. He said her teeth must be brushed half an hour after the sweet food (so this meant she couldn't really eat it outside the house.)

Over one summer holiday she lost nearly a stone and even now doesn't eat too many sweets or drink pop etc.

If she thinks it's to have "pop star teeth" and not to lose weight, it's less likely to lead to eating disorders later.

And now she's 21 and has never had a filling.

My dd is also 5 and also verging on overweight. She is very short but chunky. The problem seems to be her lack of exercise as she likes to play sitting down with toys, drawing etc (unlike her 7yo brother who is never still and is very skinny). She also asks for something to eat when bored or tired.

We are trying to cut back on snacks between meals, give fruit, cheese and breadsticks after school instead of biscuits and encourge more active play. We go to the park/beach alot but dd tends to sit on a swing or make sandcastles so we play tig and run about more.

Its a gradual process (rather than drastic measures) and nothing has been said to dd but definately good too keep your eye on it.

Good luck

Granary bread is good for protein as well, it has seeds as well as the wholegrain (including the oil etc).

I would cut out all the crap but not say anything to her, and just insist that she is up and about more.

She is only 5, she can't be in charge here, she doesn't know what is best for her.

oh my god- i stARTED drinking rocks organic cordial this year when i began breastfeeding, also to avoid sweeteners. i piled the pounds on. it's just sugar! when i stopped my weight stabilised.

i now make up iced tea type drinks with herba tea bags- bright coloured drink for kids and some taste ok.

stop the rocks!

The other thing to bear in mind is that lots of kids go out, just before they go up! She may be due for a growth spurt.

I agree with eveyone who has said just to exchange some of the snacks she has and get more exercise - I bet she would happily scooter for miles if you are prepared to walk with her :) Also, keep practising with her bike then you can go on rides together.

I would also stop associating food with TV watching - it's not a good habit to get into :)

You said you use food as a treat. Really think about how you talk about food. I dont allow and have never congratulated either of my kids for finishing their plate. Once they've had enough they leave their plate whilst if eating with their cousin he always gets congratulated by the family for finishing everything on his plate. As an adult I feel cheated if I dont finish my plate, full or not.

We have lots of fruit in the house - nice fruit - grapes, different types of berries etc. Ditch snacks with films. We dont even have popcorn or snacks in the cinema. We used to but we stopped and they dont care.

We only have water in the house and they are both fine including ds who is 14. They will get used to managing without squash.

Thanks everyone, I'll definatly avoid the Rocs.
Good point about congratulating her for finnishing her plate of food. We do this! I think it's because my parents did it with me and as an adult, I still feel that I must fill myself to bursting point to finnish my meal.

I know food in front of the T.V is bad, we will put a stop to that. I'll ask my DH to stop buying junk like pop corn too.

Water takes on a whole life of it's own if it's in a bottle from the shop - refill them and put them in the fridge, she wont notice for a while and will think it's a treat.

or fancy glasses
or straws
or novelty drink bottles
or lots of ice

The other biggie (as an overweight adult I feel well qualified on this subject :) ) is food as a reward - try your best not to do this... try to treat it as fuel, not a treat or a reward - you said about stickers they're great, there are lots of cheap little rewards or stickers on a chart type things is you want rewards.

Seeing 'Food as fuel' to be enjoyed for sure - but not a treat, reward or to comfort is one of the greatest advantages you can give your kids.

I would try and get her to drink milk or water.

Children do have inbuilt calorie counting systems ? but calories in drinks aren?t noticed.

Calcium in human bodies can bind to fat and make the fat leave body in waste products - it why adults you eat a lot of low fat diary tend to be slimmer than those that don't.

Problem with sugar free drinks is if it?s not aspertain it will be another sweetener in there. Artificial sweetener tend to be sweeter than sugar and can train pallets to expect all things to be sweeter.

Other things to watch portion sizes - ( using smaller plates means less is eaten per sitting - bizarre but true) and eat more soups - apparently eating food in liquidised from rather than meal means it stays in stomach longer so takes longer for stomach to empty and send fill me signals.

Other thing young children don't grow in straight lines - ie she may be putting on weight just before a massive growth spurt - all mine seem to have growth spurts in summer months.

Sorry I don't have time to find links for the info I've posted here - DH is making lots of noise down stairs my presence seems to be require.

Oh and don?t forbid foods ? just try and not have them around ? forbidding makes the foods more exciting and will be valued more and eaten more when you are not around.

And not all calories are equal - protein fills you up longer than carbohydrates ect so make sure she is getting enough protein in her meals - my DD also 5 often leaves it favoring the carbohyrates in the meal eg the pasta.

Have a strong word to MIL. You alone can distribute treats. As well as treats making her fat, having them regularly dilutes their power as rewards for good behavior.

YANBU.

YADNBU. Do it.

I found trying to get family on board was better than 'having a word' but it will depend of your family. If you not around you are dependent on them doing what you ask and them telling you what they have actually done not what you want to hear.

Try pointing them at health foods she likes saying there are her favorites ect providing health sancks when others look after her - all pre-prepared so less work for them.

I totally agree with Gardening and other similar posts on here. And a word of warning - try to get your dd into healthier eating patterns now - as children get older and tend to be out and about a lot more without you, you have less control over what they are eating and the situation becomes more and more difficult.

snacks -

Dont eschew popcorn entirely if she likes it. Just dont buy Butterkist or caramel flavour or those microwave ones that have 10 tonnes of salt and a shedload of palm oil.

Just buy the kernels, put a teaspoon of oil in a saute pan, add the kernels, put the lid on and turn the heat off when the popping slows to once every 10-15 seconds or so.

Its actually mentioned in the Weight Watchers book as an acceptable "healthy" snack.

Lots of v v v good advice here. I'd only add: don't go for sugar-free drinks. Being fat and having rotten teeth is preferable to having artificial sweetener (and I let mine have Coke and all kinds of junk, so I'm not obsessive about this sort of thing). Try to get her onto water instead. Not easy, though...

I think at this age it is often about portion size too, as really tired says.

If you look up the right portion for a 5yo, it is a lot less than you might think. Less than half of what you would eat IIRC.

Try using smaller plates for her to make it less obvious.

Exercise - you have 3 more weeks of hols, get her out and about every day!

My DD2 aged 6.5 is on a 'diet' for medical reasons. We don't calorie count, but can't afford for her to have empty calories so we are careful what she eats and limit food and portion size.

She eats off a small plate.
She has sugar free squash (Asda and Sainsburys do theirs with sucralose rather than aspartame if you're worried about aspartame) and is allowed one glass of semi-skimmed milk a day.
We don't use food as a reward - she earns treats such as going to the shop for a comic, or going to soft play.
Her plate is half vegetables, then of the remaining half a third is protein and two thirds carbs.
She is only allowed one snack a day, such as an oatcake, or fruit, or an ice pole.
She doesn't have chocolate, sweets, crisps, biscuits, fizzy drinks or cake. She very occasionally has a tiny portion of ice cream.

Obviously my DDs needs are quite specific, but it's really easy to have control over what your young child eats as long as other adults are on board too.

The other side of the coin is physical activity - DD2 is disabled and has muscle weakness and dyspraxia so can't do as much as her peers but we go to soft play and encourage her to climb, we have a trampoline, we go swimming when we can, she can't ride a bike but we bought her a stable scooter which she can just about manage for short distances.

Hi MLL - have found this thread really interesting as have been getting a bit concerned about my DD's weight recently - she is nearly 6, also v. tall for her age and is wearing anywhere between age 8-10 clothes depending on where they are from.

Your DD sounds very similar in the sitting down writing and drawing and watching TV sense. I also think part of our problem is that as she has never been fussy eater and always good with fruit & veg etc, I have always tended to be quite laid back about treats.

Since starting school, she is getting v. picky though, which I don't think is helping. I also need to lose some serious weight (part thyroid problem - part liking my food too much ) - so clearly need to get off my butt and set an example. Think I will get her on the Wii fit with me most days as she loves it and its's one of the few forms of exercise I can bear to do.

FWIW there are loads of ice lollies with minimal fat/calories, Mini Milk, Fab, Refreshers, Fruit Pastille lollies, mini Twisters are all pretty good as these things go.

I've also started giving DD a cup of low fat hot chocolate with a couple of suger free marshmallows (Sainsburys) and fruit for an afternoon snack instead of biscuits or toast.

Now all I need to do is try and wean her off the cheese....

Thanks everyone!! There is loads of great advice to go on.

I've spoken to MIL and DH about it and they do agree with what I'm doing. They say they'll support it. Wether they actually will in reality is yet to be seen, but hopefully they'll be on board.

I told them that she is now classed as overweight and that her knees hurt when she walks too far. I think that might have made them realise I'm not being a mean health freak. I'm going shopping today and I'm going to get loads of healthy food, I'll give the Rocs to my SIL and we'll make a new start. My husband has said that he also wants to make positive changes to his diet and is quite happy to not have the unhealthy foods in the house.

Thanks again.

The occasional ice cream as a treat is fine. Get a hot air pop-corn maker and give her unsweetened pop corn. (My kids have this occasionally as a treat.)

Get all of you to be more active (my local leisure centre has a summer activity challenge and it helps my lot do exercise over the summer). Go to new parks, the woods and other outdoor places. (For winter a Wii can help, my little one likes doing jogs with it.)

If you all get rid of the healthy foods it will help a lot. Try to not just take away but add, vegetables, fruit, new recipes. Substitute wholemeal for normal flour (at least 1/2).

Find out what physical activities your daughter likes and encourage her in them.

Good luck!

It really is best to just not have the junk in the house at all. If it isn't there you (and she) can't eat it.

I buy brioche (the choc chip ones from Waitrose) and a tub of ice cream on the weekends and they taste so good because we just don't have them everyday.

I often want sweets/ice cream through the week but if it just isn't there it isn't an option (and I am far too lazy to go out just to buy it!).

Quite a few people further up have said 'don't swap her bread to granary' - I'm bemused by this.

Are we taking white bread as the default, with granary as some kind of extremist alternative?

In my world it's the other way round. I would only ever eat white bread or give it to kids if there was a very specific reason for doing so.

Granary bread is a basic foodstuff, not some weirdy extreme fibre-food - isn't it?

I've C&P'ed from guidelines from Food Standards Agency re: fibre for children under 5 - my mistake in mentioning it above as OP's child is over five.

"But if you tend to eat high fibre foods, remember that young children's stomachs can't cope with foods such as wholemeal pasta and brown rice. Also, too much fibre can sometimes reduce the amount of minerals they can absorb, such as calcium and iron"

There is a term known as 'muesli-belt malnutrition' where young children are given a too high fibre diet and end up malnourished as their diet is not as balanced as their parents might think.

Granary is not extreme for adults but it is for young children - I was v surprised as I didn't know about the impact on children either.