To be annoyed at the classroom assistant?

[Smash09]

DD is 5 and in year 1. Yesterday she was a bit sick at her desk, not a massive one, just over her own bit of paper and her lap. I know that she is only 5 and can't explain the details but from what she told me, this is what I assume happened:

DD suddenly vomits during quiet drawing, sits there and starts crying (obviously shocked!).. all havoc ensues with surrounding children fascinated by said sick, classroom assistant is sent to deal with her and rather than discretely scooping up the sicky paper and taking DD out, she grabs DD and half carries her to the toilet (just outside the classroom). Then leaves her standing there and goes off to get dds PE kit to change in to, doesn't help her but instructs her to put the sicky clothes back in her pe bag with no carrier . Then takes her to the office where they are HELPFUL and give call me to pick her up. She had some sick still on her hands and face when I got there and wasn't a very happy person all in all!
I don't know if there is a "protocol" as such for dealing with this but I expect it happens fairly often with the little ones and I'm just a bit annoyed that she was dragged off crying and covered in sick and then had to get herself changed and stuff the clothes with no plastic bag into her PE back, so it was a bit of a cleanup mission later.
I don't expect them to spend their days mopping up bodily fluids and nursing my child, but how would a 5 year old know how to sort herself out?! I feel that the CA should have been a bit more helpful really. DD is fine no btw but seems to think CA is not very nice! I think I agree! Am I being unreasonable to want to mention it to the school?

Smash - I wouldn't be impressed at all :(

She's only little and as much as she's probably quite able to 'sort herself out' when she's well, being expected to clean herself up and change into clean clothes by herself after vomiting is ridiculous.

Horridhobo you have a bit of sense, if the CA washes her hands properly there is no reason for her to become sick. Every child has the right to be helped to be cleaned up and comforted - irrespective of whether their parents sent them to school unwell or not - it's not the childs fault.

If she had been helped properly in the first place she wouldn't have had sick all over the place anyway!

Smash - I don't know that I'd ring the school though, I don't suppose it will achieve much other than a lot of eye rolling :(

Thanks, I think actually I agree about not calling them now. I'll leave it. Like you said, I may have my facts wrong and guess I'll never know exactly how it went. DD is no drama queen but she's young so I suppose her account, feeling upset and sick probably could be a bit against the CA for not doing it all for her!
I don't want to overreact based on what I would personally do so I'll leave them to it. She's thankfully not sick often!

ChippingIn - How would you like to be cleanning up sick over and over again?? I am not saying they shouldn't do it, but inevitably they are not going to be thrilled. School staff are human you know, and TA's are not cleaners or nannies. You are right in saying that it is not the child's fault if they are sent in sick, but maybe parents should stop and think about how unpleasant and unfair it is on the other children and the staff if they are sent in sick. And no matter how careful people are with hygiene the sickness germs will spread around and inevitably do.

Smash - I don't think you have your facts wrong, not at all, you have the evidence - upset child covered in sick, with sicky clothes shoved in her PE bag - plenty of reason for complaint on those facts alone. All I meant was it's not likely to change anything and you'll just get a lot of eye rolling and as it's not something that's likely to happen again, I can't see the point in complaining...

Horridhobo - no one is suggesting they should be thrilled, just that they should be more compassionate and help the child. They can be as pissed off with the parents who send children in that unwell children as they like, over a cup of tea in the staff room - but not with the child when dealing with it. TA's are not nannies or cleaners, but they are looking after small children, not lecturers at a university.

Germs will spread around far more quickly doing what the CA did with Smash's daughter than if she had helped her clean up and change properly.

...and for the record, I have dealt with cleaning up sick again and again - not that it's really relevant.

If you had read my post properly ChippingIn you would have realied that I am NOT advocating that TA's should not be compassionate - of course they should - but it is not their job to be constantly cleaning up sick/poo/wee. They do it because someone has to, but at our school TA's are trained and qualified, some are university graduates , they work with small groups of children (under the direction of a teacher) helping those children in particular who need extra help with literacy/numeracy etc. They are not some sub-species who are there to clean up. Don't send in children who are obviously not well, and make sure that all children can change their own clothes (I am not suggesting that this applies to the OP's child). Parents need to take some responsibility for their children and make sure that they are able to do these thing s BEFORE THEY START SCHOOL. Don't forget, the TA is probably also keeping an eye on 30 other children n the class as well as yours.

Unknot your knickers.

TA's - you said I can understand if the woman in question seemed a bit off hand as she may have had several incidents like this to deal with during the day (it is not uncommon for children to wet or even poo themselves at school) and no one has limitless patience. If I ever see a TA irritated in this sort of a situation it is generally not because of the child but because of the suspicion that a child has been sent into school even if not 100% because it is easier for the parents. I don't think it's acceptable for a TA to be offhand with a small child because she is pissed off with the childs parents/cleaning up sick. You think it's fine - I don't.

If the school don't have someone else to do the job, then it is the TA's/Teachers job to do it. It's part of looking after small children.

TA's are trained and qualified, some are university graduates - so what, the job is the job, a uni degree doesn't change that.

YOU are the one saying it's beneath them to clean up, I'm saying it goes hand in hand with looking after small children. FWIW I don't regard people in the cleaning industry to be a sub species - that says far more about you....

You brought up parents bringing children into school that are already poorly, it is not what this thread was about. If you have an axe to grind about this - deal with it in your school.

Why the lecture on children being able to change themselves - feel free to save it for an appropriate thread or, once again, take it up with the Head/parents at your school - it's not relevant to this thread.

They didn't have TA's when I was at school, the teachers coped just fine - I'm sure the teacher can spare the TA for 10 minutes to deal with an UNWELL child.

I totally agree with you Chipping - absioluteky right.

Theer is no need to go on about TAs being trained/graduates/whatever. What is missing here was a sense of compassion and care for a 5 year old kid who was just shocked and upset at being sick all over herself. A bit of TLC was needed, that's all.

Thank you - Horridhobo I see what you're trying to get across completely but as you already acknowldged, I didn't send in my DD knowing that this would happen, she was fine in the morning, and wasn't sick again either. All I was saying and ChippingIn etc are saying is that it would be nice to help a small child clean up, the way it appears to have been dealt with, I would rather that they called me and asked me to rush straight there to deal with myself, if they were not able to help her. And yes - I think the germs would be spread more this way than if everything was contained a bit more carefully.
In their defence it is a large group of kids between ages 4-7 (summer program) in a big classroom so I do appreciate the inconvenience of mess and a crying child, it's just that I would rather not have seen my daughter more upset than she needed to be by it. I think many grown adults at work get more sympathy when they're ill!

I'm a primary teacher and a few years ago at Christmas, there was a winter vomiting virus going round.

The whole school had been in the hall practising carols and it was very hot (other teachers get annoyed with me for opening windows but I'm a stickler for fresh air, particularly where you you have lots of small children!) when I noticed one of my girls (she was 7) suddenly going quite green.

I strode into the middle of the line (they were all sitting on the floor, about 250 of them!) and practically lifted/dreagged her out before she was sick all over people, this was a very real possibility!

I took her into the first aid room, she left a trail of vomit the whole way but thankfully didn't catch anyone!

She was very distressed and I was trying to comfort her whilst simultaneously clean her trousers. Unfortunately, the smell had the typical effect on me and I ended up asking her to move over as I started vomiting too!

I really felt for her. I then went and laid a trail of paper towels in the hallway so that the other children wouldn't see/slide in it.

The girl was then loked after, given a drink of water etc. It was almost hometime and I can't quite remember if her mum was contacted, though I'm sure I came to talk to her when she was there.

There was no ancilliary staff around at the time and it wouldn't have mattered anyway, I'd have done the same for any child in the school. Being sick is a horrible experience and can be quite humiliating for the child, so I have always tried to do a damage limitation when it happens. Usually, I try to get the rest of the class out and away from the smell!

To get back to my original story, I had another boy who was sick in class that afternoon and I had to run out again myself! I got zero sympathy from the HT or DHT!! A TA brought me a drink of water and a boiled sweet to take away the horrible taste!

I think that anyone who works in a primary school has a duty of care to the children and if that occasionally means cleaning up some bodily fluids and giving the poor wee soul a comforting hug, then so be it. These accidents are distressing for young children and in the absence of their mummy, the person who helps them should be kind and reassuring, regardless of how disgusted they might feel.

I would like to think that if either of my boys have an accident when they start school, that someone would help clean them up and give them a wee hug.

I can remember being 5years old and crying in the playground at lunchtime 'cos I'd wet myself and didn't know where to go for help.

One of the older children's teachers (whom I'd always been a bit scared of but for no other reason than I didn't know her and she seemed quite stern)was crosiing our playground to go over to the staffroom.

She saw me crying and asked me was wrong in a very kind way. When I told her, she helped me although I don't actually remember what she did (am 41 now, brain like a sieve!). But I have never forgotten how nice, kind and gentle she was. She died a number of years ago and when I was at her funeral, all I could think of was that incident and how nice she had been to an upset 5 year old.

Children remember these things!

Anyway, as I said, I think if you are not prepared to help a child in a yukky situation and do so with a degree of kindness and compassion, then you shouldn't be in working in a school!

As for children who come into school when they are unwell or have been sick in the night, this mught seem selfish but a LOT of children absolutely insist going in as they enjoy school and don't want to miss anything!

There are of course, mums who send them in when they aren't 100% but perhaps they don't have anyone to help out and the child might have rallied a bit in the morning. We all know they can go downhill very quickly and then bounce back just as fast! Sorry, don't mean to be going off at a tangent and it can be a pain if a child comes in unwell. I usually tell them to put their heads down on their desks for a while and just try and be kind and accomodating. There are days where I would struggle to get anyone to watch mine if they were still unwell in the morning although I know a teacher who just takes the day off to care for her DD if she is unwell!!

Sorry, have warbled on a lot, just discovered this forum and had a rare chance to sit down!! Apologies for any typos, gotta go and change DS2, I detect a whiff int he air and it ain't roses!!