to think more than occasional pain med in preg is dangerous

[eml71]

We have an acquaintance who is also pregnant and constantly in and out of the A.E. or labour ward with pain issues. The doctors have never found anything to diagnose (they don't know what causes it) but she goes almost every weekend. I'd say for every 3 or 4 visits she gets pain killers and seems really chuffed to have gotten them. I have a really hard time acting supportive since taking any drug in pregnancy worries me, but especially opiates like this.
HOWEVER -- I have only felt that kind of pain in labour so I can't relate, and may be being really unfair. Is it reasonably common to have so much pain in pregnancy? I'm not a health care professional and it should be noneofmybusiness but it worries me. Isn't it dangerous to take opiates when pregnant? I guess they are doctors so they would know what to give.
I keep having this sensation that I'm watching a drug addict trying to score each time she has a 'pain attack' but feel really super duper jerky for thinking this. This person was weaned off pain killers for another condition (fibro) about 5 months into her pregnancy.

When I was pg with DD1, I felt like that. I just couldn't bring myself to take any pain meds, i.e paracetamol as it made me feel terribly anxious. Then my consultant told me I would HAVE to have an epidural due to other health conditions I have.

I did get the feeling of smugness coming from your post. You typed, 'I have a really hard time acting supportive since taking any drug in pregnancy worries me, but especially opiates like this.'

Like taking pain meds in pg worries you so it should worry other pg women. That may not be how you meant it but that is how it came across. To me anyway.

She may be worried about taking them, but she may not be able to function as a human being without them.

I know when I was in and out of the home while pg with DD2 I was in so much pain that at one point I even considered having an abortion as I literally could not cope with the pain anymore. I felt like ending it all tbh. That is so hard for me to admit to as even DH didn't know how bad I was becoming mentally & emotionally from the pain, stress, depression which the pain played a huge part in.. Such a difference from my pg with DD1.

I have rheumatoid arthritis and there are some days that I am in so much pain that I am literally drugged up on pain meds just to get me through the day.

brightlight - I can certainly relate to that, I was in severe pain from SPD last two pregnancies but particularly in my last one, so bad that I had to take cocodamol 20 mins before getting out of bed so I could actually get out of bed, if it weren't for the cocodamol I would have not been able to drive my 5yo to school, my 4yo to nursery or do anything with my 1yo. My DP ended up working 3 day weeks to give me a bit of support but with no family around I couldn't have crutches or a wheelchair and still be able to function with the other DC.

The number of times I would get a look or "should you be taking painkillers when pregnant" or even that the baby would be born addicted to them etc when I told someone I had to take them. It was not a choice I took lightly and didn't take anywhere near the dose that I was prescibed. (I did work out that I had taken over 300 in total whilst pregnant though).

OP - personally I would mind my own business. A lot of my friends do things that are whilst pregnant or with their children but you really cannot say anything unless they are neglecting them in some way

'Like taking pain meds in pg worries you so it should worry other pg women. That may not be how you meant it but that is how it came across. To me anyway.'
Yeah, even thought it's not nice I think I did/feel mean that. But I see it's way too harsh when you don't understand the situation.
I would feel terrible if I made someone worry even more because of being judgemental.

LunaticFringe - think we're both right, as I was referencing them as pain medication where they're bad as they do thin the blood - which in your case is great and necessary, but would be a bad side effect in a painkiller! :)

germl - I took co-codamol and co-dydramol throughout my pregnancy up until 3rd trimester and DD is ridiculously healthy so you should be fine.

3rd trimester is a bit different apparently as at that point morphine derivatives can make the baby too sleepy so they prefer you not to have them if you can avoid them in any way. eml71 the reason your friend was in a wheelchair at the end of her pregnancy will be this I suspect.

I had severe SPD during my pregnancy and I was on pain killers for it, and I felt like shit for having to take them and was worried it would harm my ds.

But if I hadn't taken them I wouldn't have been able to look after dd, move, sleep ect ect, I would have spent 99% of the time sobbing in agony, So I had very little choice.

You don't know what kind of pain she's in or how she feels about taking the pain kilers. So yab(a little)u

yabu. depends on the individual circumstances. and sounds like your friend has a chronic painful condition that means she needs some medication.

I can understand why you are concerned. In an ideal situation no medication would be taken in pregnancy. However pregnancy does not make you immune from illness and these must be treated in the best way possible. Fibromyalgia is an extremely painful condition. Some women are incredibly lucky and their conditions improve during pregnancy. Others suffer more more frequent flare ups. Don't know your friends medical history, but does sound like she is suffering bad flare ups.