To chase up non RSVPers?

[yikesascorpiobaby]

I am a bit scared of doing this as I don't know if it is rude or not. Another dc etiquette minefield to negotiate!
Background:DS bday party is next week and there are about four outstanding rsvps, all from boys- there are zillions of girls coming and far fewer boys. Invites went at end of term.
Do I
a)wait and see,
b)assume they're not coming,
c)assume they are coming
or d)just bite the bullet and ring up? Or get dh to ring up in the case of the mum I am a bit scared of?
Is it rude to chase people up?

d) phone them up.

It's not rude to ask politely whether they'll be attending. You'll probably just have nice chats with people who apologise for not responding yet/losing the invitation :)

Phone them - they may have forgotten / lost the invite and you can politely ask if they're coming - you need to know numbers I would have thought...

and scared of what?

Phone them definitely - tis a personal bugbear of mine but I got flamed on a thread for ranting about the rudeness of non-RSVPers cos "whats an extra sarnie and a piece of cake?"

How old is your ds? I can't trust my 13 year old to remember to dig invites out of his blazer pocket and my 11 year old invariably leaves them in his tray at school. I've been having children's parties for about 15 years and I've never known everyone RSVP. If it's a party at home I don't bother chasing. If it's somewhere where you have to confirm numbers and pay up front then I jolly well do! Lots of parents, like me, haven't seen the invitation, or they haven't checked school bags. I had a mum chase me up for a reply to an invitation about a month ago. I'd never seen it as ds had left it at school. Chasing up goes with the territory I'm afraid! And if your ds is old enough, I'd get him to do all the chasing!!

No of course YANBU I still remember my DS's sadness when not one of his invited 'friends' came to his b\day party .his b\day is on Jan 3 i didn't ring anyone (it didn't occur to me) . I wish I had!!

Oh ppeatfruit that IS sad, I want to definitely avoid that! All the non rsvps are supposedly good friends and it is important to ds for them to be there so I suppose I had better do the chasing.
Stricnine scared of what is a very good question, it is pathetic but I admit I am in fact scared of speaking to other mums... on the phone, in the street, at the school gates, you name it. Why, I do not know!!!!

its not rude at all, just phone im sure they wont mind, they probably just forgot to let you know

If you know their numbers chase them

Phone them definitely.I usually find we get very few replies until a few days before hand and then everyone responds yes tehy are coming.