to make my kids eat dinner on their own? I think so :(

[MathsMadMummy]

wondering where the MN jury stands on this.

my DH leaves for work at 7.30am and returns at 6.30p-ish. he therefore doesn't get a lot of time with DD, 3.1. he sees more of DS, 11m, as he's a boob addict and doesn't go to sleep until 10ish which we obviously want to change.

a while ago we discussed whether I should do the kids' dinner at, say, 6, so we can get on with bath/stories/bed earlier (ATM we never have time for baths) but we decided against it because we felt having dinner together is important.

but it's not working out :( it's quite stressful TBH, the table is always a mess so we're not all sitting together, DD ends up refusing to eat (and she's not actually a fussy eater at all!) and DH snaps at her, and it just drags out.

I don't know, maybe I'm massively overthinking this? is it really so bad for them to eat dinner earlier? I'm hoping we can then replace family dinnertime with more relaxing evenings, DH can have a quick play with the kids while I get the bath ready etc...

AIBU to change it? or AIBU to be getting worked up over it? (hoping it's the latter...)

off out now but would appreciate your thoughts TIA

nobody will suffer if you eat separately from the kids. don't worry about it

yes I do find it pretty overwhelming ATM - and it has got worse since DD dropped her nap as that was 2hrs where I could get stuff done.

been on mild antidepressants for a couple of months now and they are starting to work, but DH just got diagnosed with exhaustion and told to take time off, which he can't really anyway we'll gradually try to improve things and I think the earlier dinner/bedtime for the kids will have a snowball effect on everything else, so I hope.

so grateful for all the reassurance from people - it's funny what people get worked up about isn't it! one parent's must-eat-dinner-together is another parent's must-not-watch-tv - or whatever else. easy to be blinded by these obsessions, I see that now...

anyway we're having early dinner all together today as DH is off - and it'll feature our first batch of home grown potatoes!!! :o

Home grown tatties - now there's an achievement to be proud of! Well done MMM. Hope the DCs enjoyed them.

Am with all the other posters.

I have supper with DC's during the week (4.30/5ish). DH eats when he gets in which can be as late as 8pm. Weekends are family mealtimes. Don't stress it during the week at all!

MMM it's so tough when you don't get time to catch up on the housework, I found that last year.

We have all tried waiting till DH got back from work to eat together, but it all just fell apart, everyone was too tired.

It's hard work between 5-7pm no matter how you try to handle it! It is much easier if you all make the same thing to eat in the evening in terms of mess.

Also have you looked at one pot dishes - they are so easy, minimal stress and washing up

here

the potatoes were delicious! :o

so, first time doing DCs dinner early tonight. and funnily enough it will be a one pot meal, a casserole including more of the spuds.

Hope it's nice, MMM.

We do family dinner, and it really is a push; I don't get in till 6.25pm, and my husband never starts the dinner until I arrive (and even then, needs prodding, because otherwise he's a tendency towards "oh thank god you're here, I can take ten minutes to relax instead of looking after the toddler"), so dinner's rarely on the table before 7. On the nights I cook, it's hard for the same reason - I get home late, then have to start dinner at the same time as my daughter is desperate for attention from me. I do lots of cooking ahead, but it's still a struggle.

Effectively what happens is we have dinner, then she goes straight into bath/PJs/bed from there. There's no playtime.

So I'm thinking of changing things around as well, but we'll see.

I also figured, as it's summer, I can use playing outside as an incentive for DD to eat dinner rather than faffing about (yesterday she was playing golf instead ) - when she's finished we can go outside until daddy gets home and then he can play with them outside while I clear up/get the bath ready. then inside for bath, which DH will do, and I get some me-time! :o