will this kill our friendship

[iambach]

i have a friend who is single, never been in a relationship as far as i know. Most people that i know, who know her presume she is gay, rightly or wrongly. If she is she hasn't admitted it to herself.

We are close. We hug alot and are far more touchy feely than i would be with any of my other female friends. All her body language says the feeling is mutual but i need to know what is in her head. BUT i don't want to loose her friendship by scaring her half to death.
She once told me she didn't think she could find a women sexually attractive, she knows this isn't the case for me. But her body language sayd different. I don't want to get naked and dirty with her. i just want to know that she feels the same connection with me, if she does.

Is there a way of asking her this without getting in a complete mess and loosing my best friend.

was thinking i could ask 'am i worrying you by the way i am with you because i can back off if you like. I think it is fairly obvious how i feel but i am able to control this and i'm not about to do anyting wreckless that would jeopardise our friendship.'

AIBU to think if i have got her wrong she won't run a mile!

Just tell her how you feel.

She will be flattered, I would think, regardless of whether she fancies you or not.

A good friend will accept the situation.

she might just be asexual, my ex SIL is I have never known her to have any sort of relationship with anyone over the 25 odd years I've known her

She still lives at home too

she could well be asexual and as i said i don't really want to have sex with her. But i feel connected with her in a more than just a freind type of way. I don't even want to kiss her i don't think i just love her to bits. She is an amazing person.

If she is a good friend and you take the approach you suggest I can't see it harming your relationship. Just make sure you're prepared for a possible rejection in case you're misreading her body language.

If you don't want to kiss her or have a sexual relationship with her why do you want to change what you have now?

Sorry, I'm a bit confused as to why you feel the need to say anything to her? If she wasn't comfortable with the way things are now, she would show that in her body language or she would have made excuses not to see you...

To me, it feels like you just want to know whether she's gay, straight, asexual or what.... and it feels a bit intrusive. I think you do risk upsetting her, if not ruining your friendship, by asking her - mainly because if you had the kind of relationship where you wouldn't, you wouldn't need to be asking...

Agree with Chipping, just leave it alone.

If you don't want he relationship to progress (and it doesn't sound like you do if you aren't physically attracted to her) then I would leave well alone tbh. If on the other hand though, you would like to take the friendship further then you could subtly sound her out about it.

Are you sure you don't want it to progress? A little bit? Sounds like you do. If you really want it to..and are willing to take the risk of possibly losing a friendship (and gay straight whatever thats sort of thing could lose you a friend) go for it,.. It could be worth it. ANd if you don't want it to..Leave her be for now. Let her figure herself out.

If you don't want to kiss her then what sort of relationship DO you want with her?