Or is hate perhaps too strong a word?
I posted this a few days ago, and since then there have been developments.
I did refuse my sister the loan after taking all of your advice, but the day after, she came at me with the news that her H's mother has become even more ill, now she has the beginnings of pneumonia, whatever the 'beginnings' means! After my initial refusal, with this new development, DSis has begged me and begged me to reconsider the loan and really put me in a corner. She said to really think about it for a few days. I very almost gave in, but remembered what a burden it would be on my own family if I was left with this loan to pay off, so I was left with 'just think about it some more'.
On the day I visited and got the news about the pneumonia, DSis was expecting me and asked if I minded cutting off in my journey and getting some groceries for her H from the Spanish shop as he doesn't really like 'food from here', i.e. English food. I agreed, and as I arrived at DSis' home, her H was in the living room so I handed him his carrier bag of groceries. Not an utter of thanks, no nothing. I was really pissed off, but said nothing to DSis or her H, as I didn't want bad feelings.
Anyway, forward to today and DSis asked me to go into her nearest town with her to do some stuff that she dislikes doing alone. Bear in mind, her closest town is about 20 miles away from me. I agreed anyway, so spent the whole morning traipsing round doing her stuff. Absolutely boring but glad I could help. We get back to her house, as she asked me back for lunch and her H was filling out some documents for something and asked my DSis for help, so from the moment I got there, I was sat in the living room, alone, while DSis and her H were at the kitchen table filling out these forms. I was alone for 2 whole hours without a single shout from DSis, so eventually I said ever so nicely that I should make a move to avoid all the workers on the train home. Well, DSis kicked off at this. She shouted that I should 'fuck off home then' and off I went, very calmly, said a little bye and was anwered back with an aggresive 'bye' back, and off I trundled, wandering what the heck I did wrong. I'm even thinking that perhaps life would be easy with very minimal (or none) contact with this fruitloop and her knobhead H.