AIBU to refuse to play barbies/princesses with DD?

[JustBeachy]

I will happily craft, bake, lego, board games etc but making barbie/princess dolls talk to each other in faux american accents just literally bores me to tears. She is 5 and will not play with them alone. AIBU to refuse and make her save that game for when friends/grannies come over and do it with her? I feel mean but I really can't face it!!

I couldn't face it either, though it was Action Men with my DS. I would make accessories for these dolls as a compromise.

YABU - we all have to play games that don't appeal to us to make our kids happy.

JustBeachy - imagine how you could use the role play to educate your dd that there are no princes and that brains are better than beauty

Actually, my dd is approaching 8 yo and we've refused to buy her Barbies in order taht I don't have to face this dilemma

treas

"Hi Barbie, I'm just off to university, I've got a physics lab class. What are you doing?"

"Hi Princess, well I've been putting up shelves and Ken's busy doing the laundry"

"Gosh Barbie, that sounds fun. I'm actually leaving my husband because the Royal Family is being a right pain. Let's go paintballing."

I don't enjoy it either although I do it with her, in the same way I sit in the living room when dh is watching any kind of football, I listen to my mum and her endless gossip about people I don't know, I go make up shopping with my sister even though it bores me silly, just pick a lipstick ffs!! YABVU and I hope you don't feel put out when she's 10 and would rather speak to her friends than you

"YABU - we all have to play games that don't appeal to us to make our kids happy."

No we don't, that is the most blatantly untrue statement I have read all day.

My children are very happy and yet I have never played Ben 10 Super crashing with Sonic in my life.

Wigglesrock, you sound like a classic martyr.

Would you really want someone to accompany you if they loathed and resented every second of it? I'd rather go on my own. I bet your husband would rather watch Tv on his own than have you brooding in the corner of the living room like a resentful plum pudding.

Having a bad day colditz!!

Why don't you want to play barbies? It's not the 'they are so anti feminist' arguement again is it?

I hope you don't say to her that you find it too boring

Colditz - (re theminky) thanks, you said that a lot more politely than I was gearing up to do . I disagree with you a bit about Wigglesrocks post though, I think most of us do things we'd rather not, to grease the wheels life. If I didn't do things with my Mum that I'd rather not, for example - I'd never see her!

JustBeachy - I'm right there with you, I even enjoy helping to set it all up (and we have quite a lot of the associated barbie crap!), I'll even dress and undress them for quite sometime before a fuse blows - but actually play with them ---- urghhhhhh. Sometimes I'll give in and agree to play and I do for a few minutes then I'll say 'Just got to pop to the loo, be back in a minute' by which time she's so engrossed in her world that she doesn't notice/care that I've not returned and if she comes looking for me, I look very busy and mutter 'yes, in a few minutes I will'.... naughty maybe, but it's better that than just refusing as then it's nag, nag, nag....you never play with me irrespective of what else we've done all day!!

YANBU.

I get roped into these kind of games with my DS, but I like to fuck with his storylines challenge his preconceptions.

I don't have girls, but I am definitely restistant to the idea of princesses/ barbies because my niece just has such limited aspirations!

Today

DS: I'm going to be a goody pirate.
DN: I'm going to get married.

Well, at least she's a bit more realistic than he is

Nope, I've had a lovely day, I just cannot believe that you will sit and watch sport with your husband just because he wants to watch sport, instead of doing something you'd rather do.

It's not abandonment, it's called being a person.

And I do not agree that we have to play barbies or our children will hate us when they are 10. I am a 30 year old woman, I am a mother, not a child. I do not play barbie, or princesses, or ben 10. I will facilitate these games, I will plait barbie's hair, I will apply face paint, I will help clear an area for super sonic super sonic super sonic tuble sonic fights, but I am a grown woman. I don't expect my children to spend 3 hours in a shoe shop with me while I dither over flats v heels, they do not expect me to pretend to fight/play with plastic figurines.

Sometimes playing with children is boring, doesn't mean you shouldn't do it.

There is an enormous difference between not playing with children at all and not playing one type of thing which you hate doing. Surely you can see that?!

Colditz Well maybe it's not 'abandonment' and you don't 'have' to...but just because you don't have to, doesn't mean you shouldn't. It just seems a bit mean to be honest.

what's mean?

As chippingIn says, there is a big difference between playing with your children and being their puppet.

I play monopoly, console games, i read books, will apply face paints, make socks talk, and insert my vibrating toothbrush into small boys' noses.

it's not mean to say "no thank you" .... maybe if more women understood this, they'd be better at saying no to unwanted sexual attention.

YADNBU, there are loads of games I refuse to play with dcs. Ds would have me carrying him around on my back all day pretending to be a horse if I let him, which, especially at 27wks pregnant, I don't. I also refuse to play 'Mummy you're a chicken and you have to sit on me because I'm your egg and cluck until I hatch' game anymore.

Hmmm mixed response. I like the set up too chipping but it's the actual game - she even tells me what to say "then your one said, oh who's that beautiful princess...etc" I really wish she would just do it on her own!

I do capitulate once in a while and the storylines tend to be more and more farfetched the longer it goes on. If I duck out she follows me. No amount of time is ever long enough.

My usual tactic is to offer to play Guess Who? or get some paints out so she is redirected into another game rather than left whining. I do tell her I don't enjoy that game - surely it's part of life to like some things more than others and, at 5 she can understand that without being scarred for life?

I am quite surprised that people spend so much time doing stuff they hate Especially for adults! I would be horrified if someone pretended to like spending time with me an I didn't realise!

LOL hmmsleep maybe that chicken game would be an acceptable substitute - i'll try it next time!

OMG giddypickle that sounds exactly like DD!

this is the sort of game best played with other five year olds.

GiddyPickle, you just summed up exactly what I mean when I say "I am not a puppet. If you want to make somehting say specific words and do specific things, that is what your toys are for. Call me when you want me to play with you and not just be ordered around"

Agree with colditz.

DD plays dolls on her own, or with friends. It would be deeply weird for me to play along with her.

MandyMcFly - when I do say 'No', I say that I don't enjoy playing barbies, that she can play on her own (and I'll help her get whatever out & set up that she wants, if anything) or we can play x, y or z together - then it's up to her. As I said, I occasionally give in and play, but not for long.

JustBeachy - I have been known to say 'Stop being so bossy, if you want me to play I will choose what she says OK!' OR 'If you know what you want them to say, do it yourself!!!' and leave the room.... there is only so much, 'No, you say this' 'Nooooo, you say that' 'You be her.... you make her say what you want.... 'Noooo, she says...'' that I can take!!! Allowing them to do this all the time isn't good - she was getting far too bossy with her friends when she was allowed to do it with us.

GiddyPickle - bloody hell, he's a keeper then isn't he . Mind you, I suspect he spends a lot less time with them than you do! (True or not??)