to feel like a servant to my own dc

[AlwaysSickAndTired]

DC are 6 and 3. I prepare their breakfast first thing in the morning but by the time I've finished doing that and I turn to the kettle to make my first coffee of the day, one of them is already requesting/demanding this that or the other. Morning progresses with requests of one nature or another amongst the daily mundane chores of grocery shopping, cleaning, tidying up and preparing lunch. Lunch brings about a whole set of further requests: not this colour fork, not this type of straw, not this drink, i want ketchup, I don't like this, etc etc. The afternoon brings about more chores, activities, whatever... and then it's time for dinner and the same situation repeats itself. I often feel like I'm stuck in a rut and I don't even have breathing space or time to enjoy a single thought. Silence is a luxury. If bedtime becomes difficult I become extremely frustrated because I feel my DC are depriving me from the precious hours when I don't have to listen to their constant demands, moaning, whingeing and/or fighting. What am I doing wrong?? And can I just say my DC are truly lovely children, fun and loving, I know I've made them sound like brats but honestly they're not.

I guess you have not had oppositional children then MmeRed! Lucky you! But I think lots of kids do react badly if faced with a very direct 'you must do this'. Loading the dishwasher was never bloomin' 'immense fun' for my ds either - lucky you again! What was immense fun for my ds was stuff like UNLOADING the dishwasher, banging saucepans at top volume, attempting to eat the dishwash tablet, rolling the tray in and out manically, trapping finger under said tray.......I won't go on

They're all different, of course!!!!

Mine are 6 and 3 too and I'm starting to find them easier
six yr old gets up first and puts tv on
I get up have coffee and breakfast then when three yr old wakes up they get breakfast
they get what fork they're given
they our away there own shoes, dress themselves go to the loo on their own mostly
good luck!

I have six children, who are all very different. But they have all gone through phases of being eager to try new things. It is a case of capturing that moment, and once you have done that, instilling that everyone has to do their bit for the whole family.

Yes, they have done the saucepan banging, but not at the same time as emptying the dishwasher. My youngest is the worst for getting into mischief, but she also tries to be really, really helpful.

My second youngest is amazing at cleaning. We came back from holiday yesterday to the most gruesome fridge (my two eldest were at home but they didn't notice), and within an hour, she had it absolutely gleaming - all of her own accord. It really isn't rocket science.

hee hee my DS was also eager to try new things but ALWAYS related to the destructive side of things rather than the helpful. I really wonder if some people may have thought he had ADHD in his very early years!

However it can all be captured of course - he was great at jumping on cardboard for the reclycling bin

Oh actually this is quite refreshing to read. Im a single parent with 1 ds and sometimes I get him to lay table, play computer while I have coffee or shower.

I have a friend like minxo and have spent a lot of time with her this past week. When she was doing lunch today her youngest dc 5 kept asking for a drink told yes when I have made lunch. Kept going on and to distract mum said go and find your cup (it was in lounge) and when you get back I'll be ready to make it. I was when dc answered no you go and get it. The mum didn't reply but had finished making lunch and then went to find cup made her a drink and took it to her.

I actually began to feel like a lazy parent as I don't buzz around ds like this but I'm relieved to know its ok.

Ds asked for a drink and was told yes, when we've had our coffees - it wasn't until he asked 30 minutes later we remembered he'd asked

So op I would follow the advice of the pp and good luck

Can I add my Mum's invariable answer to these things:

"What did your last slave die of"

(And it took me until into my teens to realise that the answer is, of course, "Over-work")

i SHUT THE KITCHEN at some points

Just say "No", they are old enough to be doing a lot of what you mention for themselves.

Nobody even bothers talking to me before my coffee in the morning.

My DD brings me the coffee.

You sound like you have self esteem issues. There are other ways of showing love than by being a slave.