To have expected my sister to babysit?

[canella]

I'm overseas -we've no family nearby but my sister decided to spend her summer holidays with us. She's older than me (i'm 36) but she has no man or dc so dotes on my 3 dc.

So today is our wedding anniversary - we've only been married 3 years and she was with me last week when i bought a card for dh. She got up this morning - didnt wish us happy anniversary & hasnt once mentioned it all day. If that was me i'd have offered to babysit but i'm sure it hasnt even crossed her mind.
I know i've been stupid in not asking her but she's been so reluctant in the 10 days she's been here to do anything with the kids that i felt awkward asking her!!

AIBU to expect her to offer??

I mean dotes on them as in buying them presents not playing with them.

YABU

It just doesn't mean mch to some people, I'm afraid. If she is staying with you all summer, then it would not be unreasonable for her to help with the DC but you need to ask.

Particularly seeing you didn't even ask if she could. She's not psychic and it would not necessarily occur to a child free person.

She doesn't have children, there is no way that it would have occurred to offer.

YABU, especially since you could just ask her you muppet.

I can remember DSIS being shocked that we rarely went out as we had DC - it hadn't occurred to her that we would want to go out nor to offer to babysit - she was single and no children so why would it.

However when asked she would always do it.

Just ask her

I asked her if she would put the kids to bed on night last week so we could go to an important parents eve (we were out the house for less than 2 hours) but she huffed and puffed so much that i feel funny about asking her again! Its not as if the dc are babies either ( the youngest is 4)!

I know i am a muppet (great word)!! Will just force her to do it the next time!!

YABU. You can't ever expect anyone to offer, why should they?

Eh because they're thoughtful!! If the shoe was on the other foot i'd have definitely offered!!

If she's getting a free holiday with you then a bit of babysitting in return is fair - I'd ask her!

If she is staying with you for the summer, then occasional babysitting would have been more than reasonable. But you might have to ask her.

No point getting wound up about her not doing something you haven't asked of her though - if she doesn't have children herself it may well have not occurred to her. If you ask her to babysit and she refuses or makes a fuss, then be pissed off.

You can't force her but you can ask.

YABU - you should have asked.

If she is staying with you all summer then its only reasonable she helps a little, perhaps you should have been clear about this upfront.

What is she doing all day - is she treating your house like a hotel?

yanbu!

she clearly ought to mind-read you. honestly

Yab double unreasonable then!