to wonder why the hell someone would CHOOSE to go out for dinner at Frankie & Bennies

[GetOrfMoiLand]

It has got to be the worst restaurant on earth.

And it's not even cheap.

Vile food, and every 20 mins the lights dim and 'happy birthday' gets sung out the loudspeakers.

It's up there with Harvester and Bella Pasta in my opinion.

I go to F&Bs for the music - Blue Moon, Son of a Preacher, Poetry in Motion, etc etc.

Throw in a BLT with fries, unlimited diet coke and a cheap kids' menu and I am a very happy woman.

If we are going to do competitive illnesses could it go on another thread by any chance?

LeQ yes the Zizzi pizza/pasta is nothing to write home about, but the Cheltenham church really is beautiful. WEnt once with my mother who is a committed christian, her jaw quivered with disapproval when she saw that there was a pizza oven where the altar used to be.

Ho hum.

Oh was berni inn one of those places which used to serve a glass of orange juice on a doily as a starter. I used to work in a coaching hotel where the meal choices were all retro:

Juice (orange, pineapple or tomato).
Grapefruit with a cherry on top
Devilled eggs (egg mayonnaise, a bit of paprika)

The kids' menu is good - DD likes the big pizzas and 'cocktails' with free refills. I uslaly go for something hard to screw up likje a burger of club sandwich. Agree the pasta and meatballs is rubbish.

I prefer Pizza Express myself but the kids' pizzas are the size of a saucer. DD once had one that was all tomato puree with a few wee bits of mozzarella - we asked for more cheese and were told no as the crusts would burn if they put it back in the oven. They offered parmesan which DD was less than impressed with. On the same occasion I accidentally ordered a pizza with hard boiled egg on top. Turns my stomach thinking about it now!

OOh I like that pizza with hard boiled egg, Firoentina iirc.

Oh yuk floater coffee sounds poo-like.

Mind you when I was a kid a Brown Derby (fnar) from Wimpy was the height of sophistication.

Ditto the Knickerbocker Glory.

Tinned fruit. Jelly. Dollop ice cream. Instant whip. Hundreds and thousands.

HUGE disappointment.

I still am amazed that Wimpy still exist in this day and age (haven't been in one for years, still see signs on motorway service stations). Might go in one day for a Brown Derby.

I went on a date once with a guy I'd met in a nightclub. He was a Nice Boy. The kind your granny would like. Good looking, really sweet and kind and gentlemanly, but...this happened:

FN: So were are we going to eat?
NiceBoy: I know a lovely little place around the corner - it's called GARFUNKELS.
FN: Oooh. Lovely.

So, we are sitting in brightly lit, noisy and full of tourists GARFUNKELS when the waitress comes along, gives us our menu with pictures on and says:

'What would you like to drink?'

I'm just about to say 'may we see the wine list' when Nice Boy pipes up:

NB 'How much is the coke?'

Waitress: '£1.00 sir', (or whatever it was back in 1988)

NB: 'Is that for the large or the small?

Waitress: 'Small, sir. The large is £1.50'

NB: 'And how big is the small size?'

Waitress: 'About so big, sir' (and shows him)

NB: 'And how big is the large coke?'

Followed by furrowed brow and much deliberation, he finally settled on a small one.

He paid bless, him. In cash. To the penny. It was a very short date. I made up some heinous lie and left early.

Oh christ I forgot Garfunkels. Bless your date Fellatio

Are they still around?

Each to their own and frankly if you have time to worry about it, you need to get a life!

Don't know but if they are, I'm sure he's still taking women there in the hope of finding a wife, and wondering why he never sees anyone twice.

Lol MN Top Trumps

WQuite surprised that it took over 200 posts for some loser to say that.

Bless you, Malim, I expect you're smarting because it's your idea of a gourmet night out. (passive aggressive a la Bonsoir)

Awwwe we've resorted to Bonsoirisms!!
Am loving this thread. Probably the bottle of wine ive just consumed but hey ho.

Roffle at Top Trumps! Maybe MALIMOO is a regular and playing the game ... .

I always think, on the threshold of F&Bs - WWJD?

WWJD? Jane? She'd probably love it as all of human life is there to observe!

PMSL WWJD

He would get the flock out of there (and go next door for some nandos)

I rather like F&B - been in with a hungover touring rock band, & also with small dc.

On each occasion the target demographic went away happy...

GetOrf thanks for reminding me about the fruit juice starter. WTF was that all about? And the grapefruit half was hardly pushing the culinary boundaries either, was it? But be fair, there would always be pate, soup of the day and prawn cocktail as well. We knew how to live back then.

We went to a restaurant in Ireland once, and realised just that bit too late that it was crap, and we couldn't get up and leave without feeling guilty. So we suffered it, and then for pudding the DCs went for the 'chocolate mousse'. It was Angel Delight. Honestly!

I remember going to Ireland in the early 70s. The sandwich options were always ham, cheese or banana. Love it at home but as catering?