Grr... men who walk two paces in front of their wives / girlfriends

[MrsSawdust]

AIBU to think this is rude and arrogant in the extreme? I see it so often, and the poor woman is usually half running to keep up.

Thing is, my own DH does this. He is a wonderful husband in so many ways, and we do without doubt have an equal partnership. But he comes from a very working class northern background in which this way of walking seems to be the norm (sorry for the generalisation).

When I complain (which I do, all the bloody time) he says I should catch up to him and he's just walking in his own way, not deliberately ignoring me.

So AIBU to think that a couple who are walking together should ... well ... walk together?

Don't know really, we're the opposite, I tend to do everything at 100mph, including walking and I don't do it deliberately. Dh's lack of spotting the gaps to speed through in a crowd infuriate me, so I kind of forge ahead and he catches up eventually.

If it is deliberate in that your dh thinks you should be deferentially walking behind him in some kind of submissive way then of course yanbu at all.

I do this to DH, I can't help it, I just walk really fast and he's a stroller.

My parents have been married over 50 years and my Dad has always done this to my Mum. Not rude so much as he hates shopping whereas she's a browser... oh the arguments...

DH does this. He tries to slow down but then forgets and hurries up. It pees me off, as he knows I suffer from intermittent arrhythmia and there's no way I'm running after him. Thank goodness DD is happy to amble along with me.

Well I think that conscious effort should be made sometimes.

I see other couples meandering along, arms wrapped around each other and I think I want that.

I know 2 women who always fall 2 paces behind when walking with anyone else

its SOOO annoying! I always tell them off saying "you've making me look like I have a slave!" They always use the speed excuse, but that makes no sense??, they are walking THE SAME SPEED as me just a space behind, if they were walking slower they would get further and further behind, not a consistent distance behind. I keep slowing back to be level with them but they soon fall back 2 paces behind again.

So when I see it I don't always assume the man is the cause

the title made me snicker. I accuse dh of this when he occasionally does it. I ask him if it is because I look like a mail order bride.

My DH does this. Not to make some sort of twattish point, but because he walks insanely quickly and despite being nagged and hissed at for 15 years continues to walk insanely quickly. It drives me to distraction.

My son does it when he walks with me. He is six foot four tall and with a very long stride and I have to remind him constantly to slow down!!!!! DH OK, as we always hold hands anyway when walking.

Lol My DP does it to me and my Dad does it to my Mum, they have longer legs stride and don't get distracted absorbed sidetracked by shop windows caught up in the crowds

DP does this. He's nearly a foot taller and has much longer legs so he just doesn't realise how quickly he walks sometimes. He says he has to make a conscious effort to walk as 'slowly' as me.

mine does this. Drives me mad. I ask him, "are you going to X Mr ZZZ" and he'll answer, "yeah". "I'm going there too", I say, "shall we go there together?"

He does it all the time though, I give up on it really.

I walk pretty quickly, but when I'm walking with DH he's always about a step in front. He stays the same distance all the time, so why he can't just walk with me I don't know.

He really doesn't realise he does it, until I point it out to him...for the millionth time

TBH though, I'd rather he was striding in front than lagging behind.

I don't think it's necessarily anything more insidious than one being taller and faster.

I was wondering if it was a genetic thing, throw-back to more primitive days where the man stalked on ahead (possibly) club in hand to make sure things were safe.

As a fast walker myself, i can honestly say it is very annoying to have to slow my step. Much more annoying than quickening it, since the slower I walk, the longer I have to walk at a different pace.

Although I guess this is not exactly helpful information.

I go out walking as part of my work with groups. For a while rhere was only teenage lads coming to the group. We would set off on a walk up a hill or mountain and I would always fall behind. They tried to slow down and the pace was uncomfortable for them as it was outside their normal walking pattern.

Once on the flat I tried to match them pace for pace when we were casually walking along a river bank. i was jogging to keep up and they weren't pushing themselves.

They weren't being rude, just a couple would srart talking and they would fall into a comfortable pace. Well it got my fitnes up pretty quick.

The answer was to recruit girls into the group!!

I have observed this phenomenon - it's usually noticable when the women is wearing some kind of heels, and she's sort of trotting desperately to try and keep up, while the bloke strides on apparently oblivious. Worst is if they're holding hands and the bloke looks like he's dragging her along, like i do my toddler.

I think it's rather handy for clearing the landmines .

The feeling I get when my Dh strides out ahead reminds me of my childhood when I was always running trying to catch up (youngest child emoticon) - and so I feel rather inadequate when my Dh strides on ahead.
Now, I know my DH doesn't mean to make me inadequate, so I have to work on my own feelings of annoyance and frustration that I'm a grown-up and still can't catch-up .

Maybe I should have married a shorthouse like me, not someone with three foot legs!

Mine does it - he's very tall and has much longer legs is why.

mine also does this - i sometimes stop and watch him march off it's fun seeing his reaction when he realises i'm not right behind him

My brother has always done this from his teens he just walks very fast then when he notices whoever he is with lagging behind he slows down but soon goes back to his normal walking pace and is ahead again.

It's not that they are doing it intentionally it's just that is their most comfortable walking pace and unless they are focused on walking they will just stick with their normal pace.

Why not be annoyed with the wifes/GFs who can't keep up?

Slebs do this, don't thy? Remembering those papparazi shots of Chezza Tweedy and that Brian beard bloke of hers, who had obviously been given instructions to "keep two pasuz behind uz or I'll lamp yer one. Pet."