to think that as a driver I have a say in who sits where?

[fartblossom]

Right I really do not know if I should have a problem with this or not and would really appreciate your advice please.

Basically FIL died Jan 09. MIL doesn't drive, neither does DH so its up to me. I dont have a problem with this what-so-ever. We take her shopping twice a week among other places.

I have 2 children (DS who's 5 and DD who's 2). Currently we do a lot of the chore things like shopping etc when DS is at school for more space in the car.

We have a large saloon car so there is enough room in the back for 3 people. However, MIL refuses to sit in the middle. That would be fine as long as Im convinced that it is perfectly safe for one of my children to sit in the middle. Is it?

DS has a booster (he's tall for his age and is in 6-7 clothes) and DD has a car seat. Neither of which look particularly safe in the middle to me. The two end places seem to be shaped that kind of cuddles the car seats. (Hope you know what I mean)

Ive said if we were to go on long car journeys (ie trip to the seaside etc) I am more than prepared to stop as many times as needed on the way.

Basically what I am asking is: Is one of my children completely safe sat in the middle for those journeys MIL comes along? If so, which is usually the safest?

Obviously my childrens safety come first to me, but if they are just as safe in the middle I can stop worrying about who wants to sit where.

Thanks

my understanding is that it is actually safer for children to sit in the middle - presumably less risk from side-impact collisions.

What kind of restraints do you have? DC would not be safe with just a waist belt. And is MIl small enough to fit in the middle?

As long as it has got a three point seatbelt in the middle then yes, it is as safe i think.

If it has only got a lapbelt i don't think it is as safe for both your MIl and children.

If it has got a proper seatbelt, i would say have your 5 year old in the middle. Sitting in the middle of a rear seat is rather uncomfortable for an adult.

A lap belt is not as safe as a belt that sits across but it is adequate. Why can't DH sit in the middle and have MIL up front with you?

Sorry meant to add that bit. MIL is a size 6/8, about 5ft 3.

Im thinking its probaly better to put DD in the middle as she is the one in the proper car seat still.

The middle is just a seat belt. Sorry not sure what you mean about 3 point harness

As long as you have a 3 point harness in the middle seat and the car/booster seats fit properly in the seat, then I can't see a problem tbh. If you're worried that the seats don't fit properly in the middle you could always pop along to somewhere that fits carseats (or your local police station) and ask them.

A 3 point harness will sit across your body and has a belt reaching from above the shoulder, same as a passenger side belt.

3 point harness is a 'proper' seat belt, that goes diagonally acriss the body and across the lap (like the driver's seat belt).

A lap belt, well, just goes across the lap and not across the body.

Lapbelts not safe at all iirc, and in an accident can cause internal damage to your abdomen.

Cos MIL cant work the sat nav (Im thinking of more going to places Im not sure where Im going), also DH is bigger than MIL (by a lot) so no matter where he sat, would be really squished.

Yes its a 3 point harness then

Middle is fine - most modern cars have 3 point harnesses I think? Make DH sit in the back or buy you a people carrier!

Thanks everyone I can stop worrying now. I will put one of the kids in the middle,

I think it depends on the car and on the make of car seat.

I remember looking at the Britax website which has a page where you can input your car make/model and it tells you which seats are safe for your carseat to be strapped into.

In some cars the centre seat is not wide enough to take certain car seats safely.

Perhaps you can sell it to your elder DC that they will be able to see more in the middle (you get a better view out of the front window).

Then everyone's happy

DS is more than happy to sit in the middle, I was just worried about safety, but I am so not anymore whatsoever. Big massive thanks to you all

If you have a 3 point harness it is the safest seat in the car

Can you fasten 2 year olds car seat in the middle with the lap belt as that wouls be safest option if possible. I don't think booster seats with lap belts in middle are safe.

its not just the harness thats the issue - our back seat has 3 adult seat belts but the middle bit of the seat is raised so that a booster seat cannot sit level on it, you get a see-saw effect, so if the seat is not the same level all the way across i would not put a car seat in the middle bit, or only one that fitted properly

Cant you just restrict these journeys to when your eldest is in school?

Or can you and MIL not go shopping alone and leave the kids with their dad?

Forget satnav-get a map.

Could you go shopping with just your MIL (either with/without the kids) and leave DH at home? Then you wouldn't need to move the child seats and MIL can sit in the front.

Set up your sat nav before you drive off and if you're going to the same supermarket every time it won't be long before you know the route.

Yabu.

It uncomfortable for an adult to sit in the middle especially someone of that age however as you already know its the safest seat in the car.

In that situation I would make my DH sit in the back with the kids and let the old lady sit in the front. Whenever I drive round my gran or my DH's gran we always insist they sit in the front. I wouldn't really care if he was a bit squashed and I know how to use the sat nav myself!