to think the baby-boomers had it easy

[Ionderog]

Is it me or did our parents' generation have it much easier than us?

In terms of house prices yes, they were lucky.

But in other ways, no. My mother had a long and devastating breakdown in the 70s because she was an unhappy and deeply unfulfilled houswife in a world where she was not encouraged to forge an edcuation or career for herself. (Hmm wonder why I'm FT working mum).

Comparing generations by the the sophistication of the technology in their homes is always going to produce a false picture - by that measure every succeeding generation would be better off .

What is undeniable here is there is a strata of middle class baby boomers who have had luck on their side financially in a way the Generation X/Yers will not - we are picking up the bill in their wake.

Yes, very good post cat64. Also, very good points about high interest rates and negative equity. Living in Brussels I wasn't caught out by the latter but certainly when we bought our house the former was an issue. I think, like Crazycatlady says, it was more the middle and I guess the upper classes who had luck on their side financially. Wouldn't know coming from a working class family myself ;)

I think the main difference between our parents generation and our generation is the massive inflation in house prices which is usually everyones biggest expense.
We were looking at a house the other day in a desirable part of town priced at £850,000 which in todays market is not unreasonable and the owner volunteered that he had bought the place in 1979 for £11,000 which was about 3x his annual salary back then, I certainly don't earn £213,000pa.
The inflation in house prices has meant a lot of households now need both parents to work to pay the mortgage whereas in the past one salary would have covered it.

Much of it was down to good fortune. As now you could only pay your mortgage if you stayed in work. Many didn't and they lost everything in the 70's & 80s. You can't only base it on the fortunate, just because some were.

I don't resent my Mum's and IL's good fortune, they are lovely people who have worked hard and deserve their time in the sunset.

What I HATE is the constant accusations and inferences from both sides that DH and I are 'selfish' for both working, having a car, occasional holidays, iPhones etc. We want to start TTC this year but having bought our first house last year - nothing amazing and an hour ish commute for us both into London, there is just no way in hell we can afford it, even with us both working. Yet we're selfish for not having children yet, I'm an extravagant, materialistic 'career woman'.

My mum worked occasionally during her marriage, but when she did it was to pay for extras, not necessary for paying the bills, so she just doesn't understand. I'd give anything to have the luxury of choice, which she had. We have shot ourselves in the foot - working full-time isn't a choice but a necessity for all the young women I know. Having kids is a luxury we just can't afford, so for now I'll love my iPhone

Nope. They just lived more frugal lives. My parents had their own home, but no TV, car, carpets or washing machine for years.

My parents were born in the fifties.,

yy PosieParker

I do wonder how much we could save if we lived like our parents lived - hand me down furniture, clothes mended rather than replaced and often made rather than bought, no foreign holidays, no imported food, very few evenings out, no mobile or internet, heating kept down low, no Sky, elderly car, no credit cards...

It's not about holidays and iphones. Before DC we had holidays and some of the 'in' gadgets...cameras and HiFi in DH's case. PIL thought we were extravagent and should get on with continuing his family name. We did have the choice unlike their generation many of whom were parents within a year of marriage. We made them wait nearly five years. PIL actually ask DH if I was having trouble getting pregnant. Strange how any problem would have been MINE! Even my own mother thought I had chosen a career over motherhood. I was 24 FFS!

It seems incredible now. DC can't fully appreciate how people lived even 25 years ago. It will be the same with our own DC I'm sure.......many will resent working until they drop to pay for our pension etc.

Surely the pension issue is the fault of the government in any case? The only reason that our generation will have to pay for the pensions of the previous generation is because the governments of Europe (some but not all actually)have spent the money that the previous pension contributed. Also there have been loads of pensioners who have been caught out with bad endowment mortgages and pension schemes that have gone to the wall who have been left with nothing.

My parents couldn't afford their house on one salary. They struggled for years to pay the mortgage. It's really not a new thing!

'hand me down furniture, clothes mended rather than replaced and often made rather than bought, no foreign holidays, no imported food, very few evenings out, no mobile or internet, heating kept down low, no Sky, elderly car, no credit cards...'

What makes you think everyone has these now?

How much would you save if you didn't have internet? About £70/annum if you're on ultracheap plans.

Hardly enough to fund a big pension or buy a house.

FFS.

The reason a lot of people didn't have a lot of the stuff we do now is because it didn't exist.

And have you seen how much it costs to sue a laundrette these days?

'Nope. They just lived more frugal lives. '

Some did, but certainly far from few had what mod cons were available at the time.

I was born in 1942 and have had a very lucky life. Therefore I feel I should help my children financially. However we need to look at reasons. (Deep breath!) If many women had not delegated child care to child minders and grandparents, enabling each house to bring in two incomes, then house prices would not have risen in the same way. It's not wrong to have done that, but it's a treadmill that once on, it's difficult to get off.
The pensions issue is a problem which our generation went into in good faith. The increased life expectancy was not anticipated and has caused most of the shortfall, I think. I am worried that paying our pensions is one reason why the govt. cannot afford free university education, which is a source of regret to me.
I think my generation has a responsibility to be the "Bank of Mum & Dad" if possible.

But the bank of Mum and Dad only benefits our own....already privilaged? offspring!

I'm not sure I would blame mothers working/double incomes for the increase in house prices. The reason house prices rose was more to do with greed. Banks and estate agents must take much of the blame. Banks and other lenders allowed people to borrow far to much, and estate agents encouraged sellers to ask increasingly outragious prices. Yes I know it's all to do with supply/demand but estate agents didn't help the situation.

Yes people did pay into pensions in good faith. Some especially in the private sector will get nothing, others very little. Also many have retired very early and will be collecting pensions for more years than they have worked.

Sorry about spelling etc.!

"But the bank of Mum and Dad only benefits our own....already privilaged? offspring!"
Whose? Mine?
Actually I'm not arguing with you, it's fair comment. However there is also charitable giving. Or are we just irredeemable?!

No probably mine!....Actually already told the 3 in their 20's to expect nowt!
2DS already have own home, DD spends money on holidays etc.

Will of course see 17, 15 & 13 yearolds through education.

Another reason house prices went up is that people whose children grew up and left home still said in the large family home, thus reducing some of the supply. Therefore prices went up and/or more houses were built on increasingly scarce land. Not at all saying that people should sell up and downsize, but it has contributed to house price inflation.

You'll be needing a glass of wine to sort that one out!.....cheers!

Hmmm. My MIL (68) and FIL (70)are war babies and my Mum (60) is a boomer. The difference in attitude is HUGE, how much of this is generational rather than individual I don't know. My Mum and I clash a lot anyway so I'm bound to look unfavourably at her. It is frustrating that she makes out her life is so hard financially when she lives in a large 3 bed mortagage free and has my dad's work pension (he died 5 years ago) and will get a reasonable state pension plus her work pension (she still works full time and has a good income), and she makes comments that she could never live anywhere as small as my house or in such an undesirable localation. My mum was a SAHM for 7 years and didn't really enjoy it, but from when she went back to work her salary was pretty much hers to do with whatever she wanted and now my dad's died she is very resentful that she has to use her income to pay for utlities etc. She's always complaing about the gas bill etc to me even though she's mortgage free and has a larger household income than us.

Both sets of parents live just 10 mins drive from us. When I had my DD my MIL cooked me meals, cleaned my bathroom and paid our large vet bill and looked after our ailing cat (DD was in SCBU and cat got really sick - it wasn't great timing). My mum would never do anything pratical to help. If DD got grizzly when she came to visit she'd make her excuses and leave. Both my dad and mum were from working class backgrounds and became middle class due to good education (dad went to oxford) and house prices, but they never believed in passing anything onto their kids (I don't think that's necessarily wrong). I moved home for just 3 months after finishing uni and paid rent the whole time and they made it very clear on a daily basis that I was not welcome there. They couldn't understand that I wasn't able to just walk into a job the same way my dad did in the late sixties. Less than a week after I moved into digs for my first job they turned my old room into a study and explained there was no longer a bed at their house for me. So I've never had cash handouts from them, but my FIL and MIL paid the deposit on our house 8 years ago without which we would never have bought one.

I hope your mother doesn't expect you to make any huge sacrifices when it comes to caring for her when she gets old, Monkey, because I'd as soon tell her to take a long walk on a short pier if it were my mother.