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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this is selfish?

7 replies

FirstTimeMum2Be · 22/07/2010 13:31

I'm brand new to MN but when I saw this forum I really had to get this off my chest.

In March I started a new job in London which was an hour & a half away from where I was living at the time. DP also works in London & because I couldn't afford the £300 travel every month plus our rent we decided to move in with DPs mother until our contract was up & then look for out own place closer to London.

DP brother (25 yrs old) had also just moved back in at Xmas as his rental contract had ended and he was meant to be moving to Hong Kong in April. It was only a 2 bed so MIL & BIL were in the bedrooms & DP & I were on the floor in the living room. This was fine until I found out I was pregnant in April (it wasn't exactly planned or well timed I'll give you that)and we also realised that like many of BILs plans a move to Hong Kong was going to be a long time coming. Because I wasn't sleeping properly on the floor & my morning sickness was really bad I asked BIL if he would swap rooms so we could sleep in a bed (nearer the toilet) & he could sleep on the sofa. He said he'd think about it. A week later my DP asked him again & said he'd give him use of an Xbox & 37" TV to try to sweeten the deal, BIL says he'll think about it if DP pays for Xbox online & gives him £20 a week!!! DP says no to this & BIL starts saying how its his bed anyway (its actually MILs) & its his room (he pays no rent) and he has to go to work (like none of the rest of us do)and why should he go out of his way. When MIL finds out she sides with BIL and says we're being selfish (but then she also still treats him like a baby, taking him shopping & paying his bills & wiping his backside) and that she won't have it brought up any more.

We moved out at the end of June after spending 4 months on the floor but its still annoys me that this was their attitude. AIBU and selfish as MIL told me or was he just a spoiled little brat?

OP posts:
JustAnother · 22/07/2010 13:35

Her house, her business. She probably wanted to make sure you moved out before the baby was born. Poor woman, she went from being on her own to having 3 adults in the house and potentially a baby. YABU

Lauriefairycake · 22/07/2010 13:35

You weren't being unreasonable obviously but it was her house and she chose him over you.

You'll have to get used to the fact that she is going to choose her sons over you ALWAYS or you'll have a long and unhappy life in this family.

They are quite simply, both tossers. Get used to the tossers.

bonnymiffy · 22/07/2010 13:36

YANBU, he is selfish. How could he bear to see someone suffering, have the means to do something about it and not do it? He is an arse. Hope things are going well for you in your new place!

Jasonthunderpants · 22/07/2010 13:37

YANBU he sounds like a real bozo only looking out for himself and MIL no better

paisleyleaf · 22/07/2010 13:41

What a nightmare, 2 grown men living at their mum's arguing about x-box stuff.
Be glad you're well out of that now.

FakePlasticTrees · 22/07/2010 13:42

don't get your hopes up regarding babysitting once your DC is here...

FirstTimeMum2Be · 22/07/2010 14:14

JustAnother she knew we were planning to move out in June anyway, I never had any intention of staying any longer than that and it was her that offered to have us stay in the first place.

FakePlasticTrees as she's never even said congrats and didn't ask to see scan pics or anything I'm def not expecting any offer of babysitting.

I'm glad people agree, I was starting to think my pregnancy hormones had made me over sensitive

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