to think that giving one's DH a BJ as a thank you.....

[funnysinthegarden]

.......is weird Mc weird. A BJ as part of generally having sex is fine, but as a way to keep him placated?

Am very uncomfortable with this, but seeming tis quite a normal thing to do.

Now if he gave me a good licking for doing eg, the washing up, then twould be fine to do likewise..........

.........but seems some men think that they are owed a BJ because their DW is 'on' and can't have actual sex that day/week.

I think its fine if its what the lady choses to do to thank .

Its not fine if its what the bloke expects.

I love giving my OH a BJ so I don't need much excuse

I agree with Ladyanonymous its wierd if its expected. Sometimes I get a massage if I have been particularly fantastic that day,fine if he just does it wierd if I marched up to him and said "ive done......wheres my massage".

It is wierd and wrong imo.

To be fair i could get do to agree to anything in the world if were having sex or hes getting a bj at the time but its icky, i have friends that put on a very baby/girly voice to thier dp on the phone whilst saying stuff like 'lright babe, i have just seen this great pair of shoes, can i get them in return for a bj?'

do you really LA? I find it all a bit salty......

No yanbu it is a v. strange concept.

Also as a compensation for a man not having sex because DW is "on" it's revolting. a)menstruation doesn't automatically stop you having sex and b) what compensation does the woman get for not having sex?

Its a dietry prob that funnysisthegarden....

I agree about baby voice - sick and wrong....would never perform a sex act to thank for a money related issue...

see, TBS, thats what I mean. Whenever me and DH have disagreements, one friend in particular says to me 'oh you don't give him enough BJ's'

HELLO, I am not a prostitute..........

Tis foul to behave like that.

Personally I think a BJ when I want timeout (from the kids, life....) is the way forward...

all the years together and he has never made the connection.... and he's always soooooo grateful!
Of course we have plenty of nice sex anyway but my DH proposed after a particularly nice BJ and I knew then it was the way to his heart...

Yes, HB. Since when did being 'on' mean you couldn't have sex. has never stopped me. And aye if twas mutual, I would have no objection.

DP would never expect it of me, if im on and not up for it he will sometimes ask for a hand job which it either do or just say 'do it yourself' depending on pmt. We dont indulge during the first few days when the flow is heavy.

If i want something though i just do it or get it then tell dp afterwards he is very chilled out in that respect he would never moan or expect something if i have brought myself something.

I did pursuade him to get me a Puppy whilst in the middle of a shag though.

I can't have sex when I'm on as I have Hep C so maybe there is a little guilt but its really not a chore .

DP doesnt get many bjs anyway its not my favourite thing to do, i dont mind ocassionaly but not something i do all the time. He is greatfull when he gets one.

But, Macforme, while I am happy to have a shag, for the same effect, I just can't bring myself to do a BJ for that reason.

I actually find performing a BJ very degrading. On yer knees pleasing your man etc......

Perhaps it's just me?

I quite like feeling degraded with someone I trust - esp if I have dressed for the occasion

TBS, I can't believe you DS asks for a wank! Surely he would just get on and do it himself.

But if you agreed, surely twould be a turn off that you did it begrudgingly and because you had been asked?

ahhh, LA. I am obv approaching this in entirely the wrong way......

He doesnt see it as being the same as a wank he would do himself... apparently its different when i do it?!

Its not a turn off becuase it usualy get me in the mood or i dont have a very kigh sex drive but am a firm beliver that physical intamacy is important so me doing it to him and the closeness is nice, i would never do it unless i wanted to.

DP not DS!!!!!!!!!!!

On my knees? Na... my kneecaps couldn't manage that...

I love how very happy it makes my DH... he's a good man, and also it's quite fun to reduce him to a trembling heap....!

fair enough TBS. Prob we would just have a shag then to get the physical intimacy.

One persons shag is another's BJ/wank as they say.......

Well sometimes im not in the mood to actually have sex (i have ishoos from many years ago) but i do enjoy seeing DP in ecstacy over something i have done to him! lol

TBS, I have a terrible habit of confusing DH's with DS's. Have 3 boys in this house, so is an easy mistake to make. Sorry for the hideous faux pas though!

For OH's b'day last week took the day off work. He was due to arrive at lunchtime so I dressed in brand new underwear complete with stockings, suspenders, and stilettos. Full hair and make up.

"Arranged" myslef on the bed ready for his arrival and then thought what a good idea it would be to have his cake on the bed with me.

Nipped downstairs to get it quickly - whislt in the hallway the doorbell rang (glass front door) its the postman with a fucking parcel.

Did he just leave a "while you were out note?" Did he fuck? Proceeded to ring the bell another two times.

I ran into the kitchen while he then proceeded to open the side gate and walk down to stick the parcel through the cat flap - catching me in full view through the kitchen window just before I ducked .

Well, will confess that back in the dark and distant days of having a DP, I did know that waking him up on a Saturday morning with a bit of BJ action would put him in a good mood for the day. Not that he would be in a bad mood otherwise, but it just seemed to make the day go more.... smoothly IYKWIM?!

But also adore giving them to him for same reason as LadyAnon said

Lol no worries

LA - lol i bet you were red faced... lucky postman though