to consider moving somewhere DH won't get work and dropping our income by over £10k pa? Do I go to this interview? Help needed quickly!

[livethedream]

Can't make a decision so need help!

I have a job interview on Friday. I am in the North West, job is in the South West which is where we want to move to. Here's the factors:

Pros:

The job for me is a dream.
Beautiful part of the world
been trying to get out of here for two years and DS1 starts school in Spetember, after which time I will feel very guilty about movign him.

Cons:
Absolutely no work down there for DH. He currenlty earns about £30k and we just about manage. Any jobs down there for him pay £17k max.

We would need to pay for childcare for DS2 full time and DS1 probably after school, unless DH doesn't work in which case we'd have my salary which would be £18-22k. (I think.)

Rent down there is no cheaper.

We are going on holiday on Sunday anyway and to actually go to the interview DH would have to skived Friday so we could all go down there and have a weekend there before driving to Dover to get the ferry.

It sounds nuts really, but I worry that if we don't try we'll never get out of here.

DH thinks the whole thing is madness.

Help!

[livethedream]

See, I keep swinging between just going for it and not.

But the expense of going for something which I may well not get (at least £200) in addition to the hassle of havign to pack up and go on holiday 3 days early and crash on floors for three nights for something that may not be any good for us as a family anyway...I'm almost talking myself back round again...

[EnglandAllenPoe]

property cheaper than chips in exeter area...depending what you want of course (and probs not in comparison to NW)
a quick Rightmove pulled up 24 houses with 3 beds less than 5 miles away for under £150k (and exeter is commutable from North Cornwall if you wanted to look at more countysidey areas with generally low rents/ prices for nicer houses)...

go for it. it's a lovely part of the country.

[Rhian82]

Oh just picked up it's Exeter - I love love love Exeter, lived there for years and only moved away for my job. Rent's pretty decent for the SW, cheaper than Bath or Cornwall.

[SDeuchars]

Could you go alone by public transport to interview and meet DH and DC in Kent?

According to National Rail Enquiries, a first class ticket for tomorrow from Manchester to Exeter would be £68 (standard would be £72, go figure). If you can get an afternoon interview, you can do it on Friday morning and save a night away. If you don't mind being on trains for 8.5 hours, you can even do a return for about £100.

[expatinscotland]

It's only an interview. This is a recession, there might be many candidates for the job. So no harm in going for the interview and crossing bridges when you come to them.

[BeenBeta]

livethedream - you are taking a huge risk.

The economy in the South West is notoriously thin. Property is cheap down there fo a reason. There is no economy. Getting another job, if you lose this one could be very difficult. Do also check whether this job is only available because they have struggled to fill it in the past.

In short, taking a pay cut and putting yourself in a 'sole income earner' position is really a massive double whammy and I agree with your DH.

I also suspect public sector cuts will hit the South West hard as it makes up a big part of the very small economy there.

[livethedream]

Unfortunately, the interview is at 10am and it's not reachable by public transport. (It's 45 mins from exeter and £40 in a cab from the nearest station! Public transport totally out of the question. Gutted. Would be so easy otherwise.

Houses do seem to be cheaper there than they are here even, which is amazing! The only other glitch is that I probably won't get a mortgage in my name as was made bankrupt 3 years ago and prob have another 4 to go before my record is clear. And not sure what sort of mortgage woudl get on £18k...

[Cretaceous]

Why do you want to move away so much? Would you be moving to get away, rather than positively to get to the SW? Perhaps you could focus on whether you could build the life you want where you are at the moment, with the larger salary?

I tend to be a go-for-it sort of person, but why do you want to go for it? You need to make a list of pros and cons.

[livethedream]

Cretaceous - I used to live in COrnwall and North Devon and only really left by default. Came back to the city I was born in 7 years ago, met DH and we've been here ever since. We were looking to move on when DS1 came along which slowed down our escape plan a bit!

Basically, I grew up here and it wasn't particulalry good. The place is full of bad memories and there are people on the doorstep that make life hard and it really doesn't do my head any good.

There are positives to living here, but on the whole it makes me feel bad and we both want the kids to grow up somewhere a bit more green. (Instead of having to contend with fatal shootings, hangings and the like quite close by quite often!)

[onesock]

Is there any chance of getting a similar job in the NW? Are you close to Manchester or Liverpool? Because maybe returning to work closer to home is a better option, at least in th short term.

I have to disagree with the general view as I would advise you not to go for the interview if it's going to be a lot of money and hassle and then create an even bigger dilemma if you get the job. But only you know if you really want this job or whether you just feel stuck in a rut and want a change.

Englandallenpoe, we've just left the NW and found property there anything but cheap. We moved up from Surrey and were astounded at house prices in South Manchester and Cheshire. 4beds in many areas starting at around 400k. We also rented in Trafford for a while before buying and that was just as expensive. Of course, there are much cheaper areas of NW but much to rival London prices. Now back home in SE (not moving again ever) and on the hunt once more.

[HoopyFroodDude]

"Property is cheap down there fo a reason" Property is not cheap in the SW

[livethedream]

onesock - We're in South Manchester. If we wanted to buy something big enough to fit us in round here we'd either have to stump up £200k (not an option) or go and live in Shadesville. We sold up last year so we coudl rent thinking that it would make it easier to leave when a job came up.

Will start looking for work nearer here and see what happens. Can't hurt in the short term.

[livethedream]

Have declined the interview. I'm starting to get palpitations with the stress, I think we need to calm down, focus on our holiday (first time in 4 years!) and live in the now for a moment!

Thank you for all the help.

[kickassangel]

is it not possible to move house where you are? find a village location?

[onesock]

Yes, not as cheap as us poncey Southerners are led to believe!

We rented in Hale, then Woodford near Bramhall then we bought in Wilmslow. I quite enjoyed living there but- the bling!! What can I say? There's serious amounts of money around there but they do like to let you know!

[onesock]

Oh and whoever coined the phrase, Chelsea Tractor had obviously never been to Wilmslow. Quite seriously, every other car was a blinged up Range Rover or X5.

[onesock]

Well done for making a decision. Enjoy your holiday.

[livethedream]

OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

They said what a shame and asked if I would be interested in some freelance work!

[onesock]

Fantastic! I assume you said yes?

If I was still in the sunny NW, I'd pop round for a celebratory cup of tea!

[StarExpat]

What was the job?

[diamondsandtiaras]

you need to sit down with pen and paper, look closely at all your outgoings (including rent prices and childcare costs) and work out if you would have enough money to cover everything. if you haven't, don't do it.

[colditz]

You cannot ask your husband to walk out on a job he enjoys that pays well. he will become depressed and resentful and your marriage will suffer.

[sunny2010]

Hi I am the one of the other thread but thought I would continue the conversation here! My husband and I met when we worked away and were on a combined income of 35k with no dependents. We moved back to the south west and are now on 21.5k combined with one child and are a million times better off! We have a mortgage (live in a flat but it doesnt bother us. Its nice, spacious, right near the beach etc) but we have so much more to do for cheap. We are no way near as silly with our spending now because we are where we want to be. We get all our childcare paid through tax credits due to our wages, but we recieve no other help.

Would you not receive childcare tax credits if you were on lower income? My advice is Moneysavingexpert.com. Its where I learnt how to get the best deals, use voucher codes, read threads on how other people became more thrifty etc. I bet you are wasting loads and you dont even realise where your money is going. Trust me the site can really help you.

I was 18 when I met my husband and we were on very good wages for our ages in the military. We were honestly ridiculous spenders. We went shopping every week and came back with bags and bags of stuff, we were out every weekend and spending money like it was water etc. Now we go out I only buy if I actually really need it. I go out but I have a night out on less than £20 etc. I have changed my way of thinking and feel guilty about how wasteful I used to be. I am honestly way happier now and have so much more fun. You can do it if you really want it, but you have to both be willing to change the way you think.

[livethedream]

Morning!

Colditz - he freaking hates his job, I thought it might be an opportunity for him to rethink/retrain etc...

Hi Sunny! Thanks for your posts (here and on the other thread!) It almost swung me, as I totally believe that I woudl be so much happier and would spend less money on escaping. Plus when we move I would be growing loads of veggies and saving loads of money that way, and having lots of free fun on the beach etc...

But I've bottled it - we're talking about trying for a final baby next year and in light of that it's a bit barmy to make me the sole earner. And we need to get around the fact that DH will have to have a radical career shift to live down there.

I think for now I need to wait for inspiration to come to me with regards to starting my own business that would do well down there and be fulfilling, and maybe actually buying a lottery ticket so I stand a chance of winning ever.

Thanks for all the help everyone, much appreciated.

[scottishmummy]

be pragmatic if you cant afford,dont do it
housing will cost more less wages coming in
is it a we want to move or you want to move. if dh thinks its madness why are you so sold on it, why is he so against it

can he retrain for diff job,in recession how achievable is that

friends/family/childcare support- are you dependent upon friends/family for childcare

does new job fit in around child,or what arrangements will you make