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Original poster

DC's photos on the Internet, what's the problem?

50 replies

LightBlueTouchPaperAndRetire · 12/07/2010 06:35

I know this is going to be an emotive topic, but I'm genuinely curious.
Why do some people get their knickers in a twist about their DCs' pictures being published on the internet?
If there is no indication of where they live, go to school etc, what actual harm can be done?
I know the argument is about 'perverts' doing unspeakable things over the pictures, but as long as your DCs are safe with you what real danger are they in?
Surely that sort of attitude would require never allowing your children in public without a paper bag over their head in case some 'paedo' is off to get his jollies from seeing your children.
Please enlighten me...

OP posts:
Tortington · 12/07/2010 06:39

i agree in principle - the only other thing i would like to poinbt out is that some people could be fleeing domestic violence and don't want to give away their location.

SpiritualKnot · 12/07/2010 07:11

My dd had a talk in school from the police. Perverts can also cut and paste your kids faces from the photos and put them onto photos of other childrens naked bodies for their own and others sick pleasure.

LtEveDallas · 12/07/2010 07:12

I agree with you, I don't really see the harm, especially if you are Internet savvy and have your settings correct.

I suppose some people, those with a million friends, most of whom they've never met could have a point but even though I've only got friends on mine, people I have known for years and have all my photos set to friends only, I still had one person who sent me a quite sarcastic 'i think you should take down the photo of xxxx in the pool, it's very inappropriate, can't you see the dangers?????" wall post.

Dd was swimming face down and showing off her bare bum. I think it's a great photo and still don't see how there can be any danger to dd when only my friends can see it.

I get what custardo is saying, but surely someone in that position would have even stronger settings?

SpiritualKnot · 12/07/2010 07:14

Sorry, didn't mean just "your" children, meant it generically..I've still got photos up on faebook of my kids though, for friends and family to see.

gorionine · 12/07/2010 07:35

I do mind because once they are on internet they become public property and their picture can be used for anything . I am not necessarely talking sex criminals or actually putting your child in danger but the photo could be for example used like that: Look at those ugly mugs but with real child/children instead of drawings. I once wanted to send a clip to "you've been framed" and stopped when I realised I would have absolutely no controle of what the comments would be or what the clip could be used for next. Internet is even more risky in that sense.

Saddly, SpiritualKnot is right too.

Intergalactic · 12/07/2010 07:43

Agree with the OP, personally I don't have a problem with it at all. I put photos on facebook and flickr and the flickr ones are totally public (not sure about the facebook ones TBH!). I don't see how it could cause any real danger. I live in a villiage and I expect there could be more potential harm to my kids from people seeing us out and about - if anyone wanted to they could probably ask around and find out where I live. But the chances of any harm are so remote that it's not something I worry about.

As for someone cutting and pasting their face into an abuse picture - so what? It's a fake image, my child isn't coming to any harm and it's unlikely I'd ever find out about it. Obviously creating the original image is very wrong, but I can't get angry or concerned about the possibility of my child being edited into such a photo.

MrsWobbleTheWaitress · 12/07/2010 07:45

No, I don't understand those dangers - not going to harm your child, is it? But for me it's about privacy, and my children's right to it. Just because I'm their mum, doesn't give me the right to plaster photos all over the place of them; and I wish I could get out of the habit of writing about them on here, because that's a breach of their privacy too.

Original poster
LightBlueTouchPaperAndRetire · 12/07/2010 07:51

Intergalactic I was just about to say the same thing.

OP posts:
RedArsedBaboon · 12/07/2010 07:52

as someone else said. perverts cutting and pasting it onto porn. not worth the risk IMO

MrsWobbleTheWaitress · 12/07/2010 07:53

Why, RedArsed? What will happen to your child if that happens? I'd rather they had a photo of my child than couldn't find any photos and ending up with a real life child instead!

TheLifeOfRiley · 12/07/2010 07:56

For me and my sisters the worry is our father (an abusive, alcoholic paedophile) seeing our dcs tagged in pictures and then being able to recognise them and use that to his advantage to try and gain contact / access to them.

Also know of an old school friend who moved literally to the opposite end of the country to escape a very dangerous ex and went into hiding with her dcs, him seeing their dcs pics on facebook for example could have grave consequences.

For me the bottom line is it's about respecting people's privacy and personal wishes.

RedArsedBaboon · 12/07/2010 08:12

but they would be using the pic of the child. it would be your child face on anothers naked body.

MrsWobbleTheWaitress · 12/07/2010 08:17

So? Yes, the idea of it feels horrible, but it's not hurting any children, and they're going to do it with photos of a child whatever happens! Why does it make any difference if it's my child? Just my own icky feelings about it. The answer is not to think about it IMO!

bigstripeytiger · 12/07/2010 08:20

How common is it for peadophiles to cut and paste pictures of children that they dont know at all onto pronographic images?

Given the ease with which paedophiles seem to access child pornography on the internet it seems like it would be a bit of an effort for them to bother putting the face of some random child onto the picture.

RedArsedBaboon · 12/07/2010 08:23

It is quite common BST.

BUT if you are ok with it then that is fine. I just gave my opinion that I am not ok with it and for that reason I wouldn't volunteer pics of my children on the internet.

MrsWobbleTheWaitress · 12/07/2010 08:25

I'm not 'ok' with it - I think it's horrible! I just don't think it's a rational reason not to have photos of children on the internet.

grumpypants · 12/07/2010 08:29

I don't want one of the dcs fathers to know where I am. Therefore, I have asked people/strangers in RL to avoid including said dc by accident in a foto of their own dc while we are out. I wd be a bit cross if this dc was on Facebook because I can't control; the settings of other peole's pages, but I can my own. The cut and paste thing doesn't occur to me in terms of my own child, as others have said.

FluffyDonkey · 12/07/2010 08:29

For me it's just that once they're "out there" you can't get them back.

I once saw an article (in the Times ) where they showed lots of pictures of girls in bridesmaids dresses and made horrible comments about the dresses/girls.

I also think it's extremely odd, that through google I can look up the wedding pictures and the baby pictures of an old friend from school whom I haven't talked to for 10 years. Ok it's not "harming" them, but I do think it's odd.

But it's all about choice. I choose to have as few photos as possible of me/my family on the internet (I have never posted any of me but I know at least one friend has a photo of me up which I'm not happy about but am not getting worked up about)

scrappydappydoo · 12/07/2010 08:29

I don't have to much of an issue with it although dh does so i don't post pics of dds on internet.
Dh admits he doesn't have a particular reason just that he doesn't feel comfortable with it and thats enough for me. Besides if there are any nice photos I want to share I would e-mail them out - don't really think my 'friends' on facebook would be all that interested tbh.

bigstripeytiger · 12/07/2010 08:32

Really RAB?

Do you have any data on the 'size' of the problem - eg the proprtion of convicted paedophiles who have been doing this, or the number of instances of this detected?

It just seems like a big effort to stick the picture of a child that you know nothing about onto a porn picture.

deliciousdevilwoman · 12/07/2010 09:16

I'm with RAB on this. I just don't see the need to post pics of kids via the 'net, personally. Each to their own, though.

chandellina · 12/07/2010 09:16

the internet is awash with images of children of every age, many posted by children themselves. I think the chances are very slim of your child's photo being singled out by some sicko.
I'm more concerned about the suggestive photos young girls (such as my nieces, aged 13 and 16) post on their facebook pages.

DetectivePotato · 12/07/2010 09:24

I don't really like this. I dont mind on my friends FB pages that are private but my DH's cousin's page is open to everyone and she has loads of pictures of DS on there from xmas. I'm not very happy about it tbh. Would this bother anyone else to the point where they would ask her to take them down?

I didn't know about the cutting and pasting thing. Disgusting and puts me off even more wanting my DS's pictures open to everyone.

OrmRenewed · 12/07/2010 09:27

It doesn't bother me. If I was wary because of an ex or someone else who was trying to find my DC I would feel differently. As for the paedophile thing - they are just pictures not real children. It wouldn't hurt my DC.

mummytime · 12/07/2010 09:30

I would also want to make my kids wary of posting their own pictures on the internet. As its a bit like smoking, if you never smoke you are unlikely to try cannabis. If you never post pictures of yourself, you are unlikely to post ones of yourself that are sexually explicit. And it does happen, teenagers texting photos of their breasts to boys they like etc. Then as well as the boys being able to text it around the whole school, what if a friend on Facebook offered to send a T-shirt for a photo , and so on?

Anything on the internet is public, and may never go away.

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