AIBU to think my neighbours have no manners?

[MeandMyKid]

We moved into our new house about 5 months ago and about 4 weeks later we invited our neighbours round for supper and drinks to say hello. AIBU to think that 4 months on they should have invited us round for a drink (I don't expect supper) as it is good manners to return the compliment?

I think yanbu at all, your neighbours sound rude. It's only civilized to return an invitation I think, but it seems we are in a minority!

I don't disagree, but what sort of timescale is reasonable? Isn't this different for different people? If someone only likes to entertain a few times a year then it will take a while for a return invitation IYKWIM.

"It's only civilized to return an invitation I think"

We live in a very friendly street. There are lots of families with kids the same ages, most of them going to the same school. And lots of elderly people who smile at the kids (and give them the occasional treat). Us mothers go out as a group every couple of months, and the Dads do too.

We have been round to each neighbours' house (well, not every neighbour, but the dozen or so we know well) several times but haven't invited anyone back for the past couple of years. Because dh's hoarding has reached such ridiculous levels I am embarrassed to have people round. So we see our friends outside the house and only have people we know VERY well inside it - close family, ds's old nanny (and a big tidy up before she comes).

I do try to keep dh's hoarding under control but it's a losing battle. However, once I have passed my driving test and can fill the car full of stuff for the charity shop/tip, All This Will Change. (I do take stuff to the charity shop but can only carry a couple of bags at a time - not as much as he ruddy brings home.)

YABU. You did a lovely thing invinting them round, but it's impolite to keep track of invitations like that - you invite, enjoy, move on, invite someone else - or invite them again! I don't always return invites directly, I just figure if everyone is generally hospitible it all works out. Maybe their kids are rubbish sleepers and are scampering round sweigging fruit shoots til 1am. Or something. Live and let live, and invite someone else round - without keeping track. It's an act of generosity on your part, not a trading card swap.

OP, you are me four years ago.

We thought if we had adjoining, and rather thin, walls we should say hello. We had the neighbours over for a meal when we had other people over with kids the same age as the neighbours, it was all fine.

Didn't get a return invite, wasn't bothered really but at the back of my mind thought it was a tiny bit rude.

We did get a return invite two and a half years later though, so you might get yours eventually! We couldn't go, but that's not important!

I suppose what people are saying is true and the neighbours might have thought we were being too full on, but personally I feel we were just being polite, right OP?

I am more concerned that there is something wrong with us or something we did but I think we're pretty nice and chilled in company. If I was being full on I think I would have pestered them but I haven't actually spoken to or sought to speak to them in 4 months. I suppose everyone as a different view of what OTT is.

My neighbour one had a long conversation with me over the front garden fence, in full view of the terraced street, in nothing but his yfronts - he is a large man in his late 60s. I didn't know where to look, but it was pleasant and friendly enough - but just in pants.