Traumatised by what I have found out about hair dye allergy

[Ceriane]

When I was young in my teenage years and early twenties I used to occasionally experiment with hair dyes. For a while I regularly had it highlighted. Then in my 30's when I started to get a few greys I used Naturtint two or three times a year, didn't really need to as you could barely see the greys.

I never had a problem with it, and was oblivious to the dangers of hair dye allergy - just thought if you were okay with the patch test you were fine, and if you did notice any burning on scalp just wash it off.

However towards the end of my 30's I saw a magazine article where people had had an allergic reaction to a hair dye, and the images looked horrific - people with swollen heads, faces, eyes closed over and life threatening anaphylaxis. I heard people have died from it. However, I had no reason to think I would have a hair dye allergy.

In the lockdown I didn't dye my hair, I was still only 37 and didn't really need to, when we came out of lockdown I was 39, so I did dye it and was fine, and then after about 3 months you could see the greys.

The year I was going to turn 40 I booked in to have highlights, thinking I need to start thinking about how I'm going to cover the greys now I'm a bit older. I had the patch test and it was fine, but then I chickened out of the appointment after I remembered what I heard about hair dye allergy. I am an anxious person. I instead used Naturtint at home as I had never had a problem with it. I had no reason to think I would have a problem with the highlights either.

Then July last year, after I had Covid-19, I used Naturtint again, and this time I had a slight burning sensation on my scalp later that day. Nothing really bad, but it made me think, could I have developed an allergy. So obviously I was now scared to dye my hair. I thought it seemed really ironic to have developed an allergy after being worried about developing an allergy when I didn't have one before.

I then didn't dye my hair for a full year. I did try a patch test for a henna based dye, it seemed fine but I decided to give my hair a rest after dying it unnecessarily so much when I was younger.

A side issue is that over the last seven months I have been having therapy because I developed an obsessive phobia about allergic reactions in general - which has affected everything from worrying about food, drinks, products, going out and I have had really bad anxiety in general over this last year. I developed an irrational fear of potentially being allergic to anything and everything basically.

2 weeks ago I decided to try a patch test for just a normal hair dye. After 24 hours I felt unwell, the next day I had a burning sensation in my arm where I had applied the patch test, and this was followed by intense nerve pain that has spread down my arm, that I still have days later. I thought there would just be a bit of itching or redness if I was allergic I didn't expect pain. I have also been feeling sick for the last two weeks. I have spoken to an ANP at my GP surgery and they have said obviously don't use the dye and to monitor it for two weeks, and come back if it hasn't gone. Obviously I won't use the dye.

When googling to see if anyone else has ever had this problem and I was horrified by what I read. That someone had a reaction that was like 3rd degree burns and that if you have a bad reaction to a hair dye, the pain can be so severe that you have to be put into a medically induced coma as it is so bad. My fear before was of anaphylaxis, now that seems like nothing - my fear is now of pain. I keep shuddering to think what would have happened if I had have actually used the hair dye, and I know this sounds ridiculous because obviously I didn't use it, I feel like I am really mentally distressed by what I have read, I keep on having images of peoples faces swollen up from hair dye allergy and intrusive thoughts about how bad it would have been if I'd have used it, I can't stop thinking about it and it's making me ill. I know I sound absolutely nuts. I was doing so well on my fear of allergies in general, but this has thrown me and really shook me up, the fact that I do have an allergy - to hair dye - and that if I had have used it I would likely have died a really painful and horrible death and what I know about hair dye allergy is 10000x worse than what I thought I knew, so it's really set me back.

I have heard other people say that they have experienced a burning sensation after dying their hair and I feel like I need to warn them. People are putting themselves at risk. To be honest, I think they should ban these chemicals as they are more dangerous than I could ever possibly imagine.

I decided that it is way to much of a risk to use anything on my hair, so I will have to embrace the greys, I felt okay about this until yesterday, when I was at a wedding, I was so self conscious of my greys, and everyone else there was not a grey hair in sight, even in women in their 40's, 50's and 60's, so they are clearly all using hair dye - it scares me that people could have an allergic reaction at any time, and they are walking around oblivious to the danger. I felt like I looked rubbish compared to everyone else, I didn't think I was vain, but this has really got me down. It's also a real sense of loss as it's made me realise, I'm not a young girl anymore and can't even make myself look like one. I'd always looked young for my age, and always felt fairly attractive and now I have grey hairs that I can't do anything about and this is only going to get worse as I get older. I know a solution would be to find a hair dye that doesn't have PPD and other chemicals and that I am not allergic to, but I just feel that I can't take the risk of using anything on my hair.

Also my family think I'm being silly, and keep saying things like "for goodness sake, just dye your hair, hair dye won't hurt you, you've got to at some point". They don't believe me that I had a reaction to the patch test. Obviously I'm not going to use it and have thrown it out, but it's making me feel really unsafe and alone in what I'm going through.

I'm so sorry that I have written practically an essay on hair dye, but I really do feel distressed by this whole issue, it has shook me to my core, and I know I sound like I really am neurotic but this has really bothered me. I'm acting normal around people, but I feel traumatised by something that didn't happen but nearly happened if that makes any sense. I've put this in allergies but I think it's also mental health as I'm suffering extreme anxiety.

My scalp started to itch and burn after having my hair dyed. So I stopped, as didn't want to risk it getting worse.
Last dye was in April 2022 and just had the last dye cut out this week.

It's liberating and I'm nowhere near as grey as I thought I would be.
I've plenty of brown left and it's now multi tonal and in great condition.

Just don't die your hair, it isn't compulsory. I never have, and it has never occurred to me to

There are plenty of people who don't have health anxieties who have had severe reactions to hair dye. Maybe the people who keep posting that this is just the op's issue could do with remembering that. I mean obviously millions of people do due their hair without issues, but allergic reactions do seem to be increasing and the reactions can be very severe, sometimes even fatal.
Op, your family do sound awful. Sorry. I know it's hard living with people with anxiety but dismissing it al the time is the worst way to deal with it. I imagine that just makes you feel much worse.
Your self worth is not determined by your hair colour. Or any other aspect of your appearance.

From your description of the série of events, I’m wondering if you haven’t developed MCAS (basically some sort of allergic reaction) following covid. This is not unusual after covid/LC.

I personally would NOT try to die my hair with the same product again (or one with similar ingredients) after such a reaction. I mean who would want pain lasting several days because they’ve die their hair??

The problem for me is that you’re presented this very physical reaction in the middle of a long description of what you’re n ious about so everyone only sees that.
imo that’s a totally different issue, that you need to address yes. But not by doing a couloir and hiding your greys.

www.nhs.uk/conditions/hair-dye-reactions/#:~:text=irritant%20contact%20dermatitis.-,Allergic%20reaction,%2C%20or%20even%20days%2C%20later. You prompted me to look it up and it's very interesting re the black henna tattoo link I think I might have had one when a teenager

Oh that’s easy.
Because no one ever tell you that you can have an allergic reaction. I’ve rarely had a colour/highlights done and no hairdresser has ever made such a comment. If doing the test patch is ok then surely, there is no other risk right?

When my greys became more noticeable I had my hair bleached blonde. I don’t know if the same chemicals in hair dye are in bleach but I don’t believe so. After my roots are done I use a Scott Cornwall toner, no allergy warnings as it contains very little in the way of chemicals. I always said I would go blonde rather than dye my hair because grey roots with dark hair look horrible. Might be worth asking a hairdresser about. My scalp does sting a tiny bit while the bleach is on but that’s just the skin reacting to it rather than an allergy. It’s a strong substance.

But we all know the risks of getting in a car and we still do it. We know the risks of smoking but people still do it. I'm pretty sure more people have died more from those two things than dying hair.

I know it's a big deal to you, but most people won't think twice about it because that's just life. And a much easier way of life at that.

Thank you. The whole issue is really getting me down. Obviously I have no intention of dying my hair, it's way to dangerous, and clearly there are some, if not all dyes that I definitely cannot use. At some point I may find another way around it...not sure what, but I think I am going to park this problem for the time being....I think it has highlighted to me that the relationship I have with certain family members is not what I thought it was, their reaction to everything is to tell me it's anxiety...even when it isn't, so are very dismissive of absolutely everything, when this time, and it is just unbelievably upsetting. I feel like going NC with some of them over this. I do have a legitimate allergy. The whole thing is so confusing for me to deal with as it has happened in the midst of me dealing with anxiety about allergies in general, but that is off the back off, I did genuinely have reason to think I may be allergic to one or two things (and this spread to a fear of potentially being allergic to anything and everything which I know is irrational). I am not just an anxiety sufferer, I do have a legitimate issue here. I know people are saying "you do not have to dye your hair" and of course you don't have to...but from people I know, to people I see everywhere I go, to people on TV if you are honest, I rarely to never see anyone that just leaves their hair to go grey. Near enough everyone you see has had something done to their hair, even young people who don't need to. Again, I know it's trivial compared to what a hair dye allergy could do to you, and I know there are way more important things in life than what you look like, and I know there are WAY worse things in the world, I didn't think I was vain or looks obsessed, but I don't think I am being OTT to say that this is a big loss to know that I am going grey, and there is nothing I can do about it. I know I will come to terms with it, somehow or find a way around it, but it is a big loss, I know we all age, I know we all get older....but I have always been someone who really made the best of themselves and I feel that I am now not going to be able to do that. I know I'm worth more than what I look like, but this is really going to affect my confidence. I've always tried to be really positive about everything that ever happens to me, and I'm used to my feelings being dismissed by my family, so I have always had to hide my feelings and even physical illness so that I don't annoy them or them cause a row, and I think this may be what is behind a lot of my anxiety.

I have adult onset allergies. I have not found a hair dye that is safe to use. My allergies are so severe I avoid even stepping foot into the salon anymore and just cut my hair at home. Just taking my child for a haircut is enough to trigger a reaction at this point so my husband does that thankfully.

the world will not end if you can’t dye your hair.

you can embrace your natural color and even accept going grey. Hair dye is far from necessary

Thank you. I'm just going to have to come to terms with the fact I'm going grey. I'm just about getting away with it at the moment, you can see the greys if you are up close, but from a distance you can't yet. I will just have to see how long I can get away with it, and maybe when I'm older, I will be okay to just be grey. I could even experiment with things like hair pieces or something like that to cover them. I do agree that is is crap that society expects women to look a certain way....I was always able to look that certain way, and now that is slipping away from me faster than most people because I can't dye my hair.

I'm clearly missing something here.... why are you panicking about bayalage hair colouring, when the whole point of it is that it is being done on the ends of the hair and doesn't need to touch your scalp or any skin at all?

I don't feel society expects me to look a certain way, if you do own it don't blame society

@OrderOfTheKookaburra because even if I went for balayage it would still have PPD in there and it would still be a risk even if it didn’t touch your scalp. You can’t put something you are severely allergic to on your hair, that’s why they do the allergy test, even for balayage.

@WandaWonder I have always felt pressure to look a certain way, most people I know do.

Thank you for all of your replies. I think for now I am going to have to accept that I just cannot dye my hair, make the most of the fact you can only see the greys if you are close up, and maybe in a few years it won’t matter so much that I’m grey as I will be older. I think it has just thrown me that I have a genuine allergy in the midst of battling an anxiety disorder that cantered mainly around fear of allergies. I can still work on getting better from that but clearly will not be dying my hair.

@Ceriane you know grey is great too.
Maybe lots of people around you are colouring their hair but look at celebrities and those who have gone grey. They are still glamorous and real celebrities.

I dont think grey makes you look old as such. What makes you look old is how you hold yourself. It’s the look in your eyes. It’s your clothes (not mouton dressed as lamb territory either ). The way you see yourself and how you live your life.

It’s ok to not colour your hair.

Thank you. I know, it's just that it's going to be a big change for me. Because I have dark hair, greys really show, so I don't get away with it like people with lighter hair might. I know some people really rock grey hair, but I'm not one of them. I think it suits people who have that kind of blonde haired, blue eyes kind of look, I have dark hair, dark eyes etc....I was blonde once when I was in my twenties and that didn't suit me, so grey definitely won't. However, I will keep positive and make the best of myself even if I am going grey....if the worst comes to the worst I may even buy a few wigs....would hate to think I'm wearing a wig to be honest, but hey, at least I can have fun with them. I know I probably sound really vain, but this has got me down. I know worse things happen, and thank God I didn't use the dye, that I found out that I was allergic and didn't use it. Anyway...we move on....I can move past this chapter and still get past my anxiety, as I have been doing with the issues with food and drink and going out....dying my hair is just the one thing I can't do, but that's life, it's seldom perfect.

My DM has skin allergies including to hair dye, and has non-bleach highlights woven into her hair avoiding the scalp.

You obviously don’t have to dye your hair though.

You could absolutely not dye your hair at all, lots of people don't. But wash in wash out stuff should be ok for times when you fancy a change.
Shrine drops just mix with your conditioner and coat the hair. It doesn't contain anything like ppd and isn't permanent. Also dyes like crazy colour, directions etc or the Superdrug colour shampoos. Obviously do a patch test first just to double check

So, I have the hair dye allergy. The culprit is Paraphenylenediamine (PPD). I had dark brown hair with steel and yellowy grey coming in, not the beautiful silver grey, and it did NOT look good. So we used a dark brown dye to cover it. I was lucky that we 'caught' the allergy at the 'slight burny itchy' phase. I had patch tests done at my doctor to confirm.

My stylist used/uses a combo of bleach and a non-PPD auburnish-blonde shade in foils to turn me into a 'streaky brown' blonde. As I've aged (in my 60s now) and gotten 'greyer' she's gradually phased in more of the blonde and my natural grey. She's a miracle worker and so patient at first to find a dye that didn't have PPD but was still considered a 'permanent' dye.

Thank you. It is possible that one day I may be able to try something like you have suggested, that doesn’t contain PPD or other harmful chemicals, but probably won’t consider it for a long time, will leave it as it is for now, dark brown with a few rubbish looking grey streaks, and maybe try hair pieces etc if I want to jazz it up for an occasion. I think though I wouldn’t consider it for a good long time and not without medical advice and tests to find out exactly what I am allergic to. I think though it could well be that I just never dye my hair again and let it go grey and I am starting to come to terms with that.

BTW the extreme emotional reaction I had recently, I didn’t have a year ago when it was just a slight burning sensation after using the dye… the extreme emotional reaction came about after months of increasing anxiety about potential food allergies, the really bad reaction to the patch test and then what I read online about just how serious hair dye allergies can be, and realised I had been slightly naive to it as it can be a LOT worse than what I thought, really shook me up. I’m not normally a hysterical person, just going through a bad time lately with anxiety.

Also my family think I'm being silly, and keep saying things like "for goodness sake, just dye your hair, hair dye won't hurt you, you've got to at some point". They don't believe me that I had a reaction to the patch test. Obviously I'm not going to use it and have thrown it out, but it's making me feel really unsafe and alone in what I'm going through.

This stood out to me. When people have a logical fear that is dismissed it can cause them to get more afraid/panicked about it.

How can you family not believe you? Their response is irrational.

They are dismissive because they have seen me go through anxiety, especially over this last year....so anything I get now, their attitude is to get angry and tell me it's anxiety...which makes me more anxious. Their attitude towards it all is pretty bad to be honest, and this has made me realise that. It's really upsetting to be honest.

Yes, it doesn't sound very helpful or supportive.

Sometimes it is more helpful to confide more in people who are helpful and less in people who don't help. That doesn't mean tell them nothing but maybe they're not the right people to really help when your anxiety is bad.

Also remember the anxiety is only a bit of you, you are many many things in addition to 'anxious'. Try to remember all the other things you are too.