How do you react if someone offers your allergic child food?

[mumtodd]

My dd is 15 months old and has an egg allergy. It is fine when dealing with close family and friends as I have explained it to them and just remind them to check ingredients if they are giving her anything. The other day a friend of my dad asked me if she could have a bar of chocolate. Before I could say anything my mother said 'no, she has allergies' and the poor man looked taken aback. I want to be able to tell people in a polite but firm way without sounding like an over anxious mother. I think some older people think allergies are all in the mind but dd has been properly diagnosed after a bad reaction so we can't take any chances.

I had the same thing with my LO and an egg/dairy intolerance (so not as bad as your situation)and also vegetarian. To be honest I do feel like I am being fussy at times but people really don't mind. You probably can't imagine it at the moment but your LO will soon be speaking up and saying something themselves about what they can eat! My son who is 3 will quite happily ask if something has egg in it now (and make some rather bizarre statements about what vegetarians can/can't eat!)I think the bottom line is that in fact there are lots of people around with allergies etc and so people are much more understanding of it than you might expect. Also, when it comes down to it you are doing it for your child's welfare and not to be difficult.

My DS (4) has an egg allergy and I've never had a problem with other people. Most are very understanding and appreciate receiving guidance of what he can and cannot eat, and for me that's been the case whether it be kids' parties or school snacks etc. What I have found, though, is that people are really shocked when they realise what products can contain egg (ice-cream, cheapo sausages, stuff with breadcrumbs, chocolate, croissants etc). DS had a recent reaction to hot cross buns that we didn't realise had an egg glaze

My mum STILL mortifies me by saying "does it have nuts in it" to anything I take off anyone (I have a nut allergy BTW!). So I think it's right that you're firm and polite. But also that you're not neurotic as your child will pick up on that.

I would simply say "she has an allergy to eggs so I'd better check the ingredients first, but I'm sure she'd love some chocolate". I would tell your mum to calm down a bit...

My friend's DS is allergic to milk and is very matter of fact about it. He is 3.5years and asks politely if there is milk in the offered sweet/cake etc as he is allergic. He doesn't fuss.

My DD is allergic to nuts and although she loves nutella, she knows it makes her skin really itch so doesn't eat it. She did say recently that when she is a bit girl (she is 5) that she will be able to eat nuts.

Does anyone know if you can "grow out" of a nut allergy?

I think you can grow out of nut allergies, you can certainly grow out of most of the others. Just be kind but firm - 'thank you for offering but DC has a food allergy so I'll need to check.' I've found generally (and we don't have any food allergies) that people tend to ask before offering or giving food, whether because they are allergy sensitive or they've just got the idea that it's polite to ask the parent/carer first in case the DC is about to have lunch.

I have the same problem, my ds who's 3yrs has been diagnosed with acute peanut and tuna allergy, but people I know still offer him chocolate he asks me to read the packet but if I have to say no, Im frowned apon like im a bad mother.

my dd2 has anaphalactic reaction to peanuts, I was told there is a 10% chance she could grow out of it.

people I know here in Canada are very used to allergies and know how serious it can be. I found it very hard when I was back in UK though, people are just not as aware of anaphalaxis etc. flower - does your ds carry an Epi -pen?

I agree with alot of what has been said. I jsut say something like...'ds has a bad allergy to nuts, can I just check the packet because if it doesn't have any he would love some'. Tbh they usually ask how I know, what happens etc (checking if you're neurotic). I usually give a quick, oh he'll go blue, maybe throw up and stop breathing so we have our epipen with us people love the drama and it's no big deal. DS is very vocal though and tells everybody, he also, now he's 7 uses it to his advantage when he doesn't want to eat something or try something new . 'Better not have that it might have nuts' it's chicken get on with it .
I was told that nut allergies are the one type that you don't usually grow out of sadly.

My nut allergy (mainly peanuts, cashews, brazil nuts) has certainly reduced I think. Though it's hard to test the theory really. As a child I would have anaphylaxia, though nuts rarely made it past a touch to my lips due to the swelling so I only had a very bad reaction a couple of times. Nowadays, I'm pretty sure I just get mouth/tongue swelling, wheezing and sickness. Though I'm not entirely sure as I have only had that reaction a couple of times and can't be sure it was nuts I ate. hope that makes some sense... I certainly don't mind living my life without nuts, nor do I mind exercising caution (and taking risks!) when eating out. I still carry my epipen just incase.

used to say thank you but I'll have to check its safe first as my child has a nut allergy. People then tend to panic and you get the questions about how you found out and how they will react. People with young children themselves often worry about how they'd recognise it.

You can grow out of a nut allergy, about 20% do according to our doctor. However you're not likely to outgrow it if your tests result was high and if you have it at 5 then you have it for life. Reactions are unpredictable and someone who has a minor reaction one time can need an epipen the next - according to the allergy consultant we saw. I've met people who have been told they have "outgrown" their allergy only to have an anaphylactic reaction next time they ate the food.