Per the title. How the flip do I do this without going completely insane?
DD (4, suspected SEN) has a mixture of food aversions, fussy eating, and general limitations on how her food can be arranged on the plate. She won't eat meat unless it's blended with a sauce which then can't be touching pasta or rice etc, she'll only eat about three vegetables (unless they are blended in a sauce as well) and three fruits. She's also really slow to eat, up to two hours for an evening meal and has to be spoon fed anything with liquid in it. The only meals she will eat with a sauce are curry and spaghetti bolognese (which is how I sneak in most of her protein and vitamins, alongside vitamin supplements and cheese and eggs).
DS (10 months) has suspected CMPA and as of yesterday at least one other allergy which we will now need to try to pinpoint, as all the foods he had were previously safe foods (multiple exposures with no reaction), and definitely had no dairy or cross contamination. Unfortunately this knocks me back to about 25 safe foods for now. He really struggles with actually getting anything in his mouth (BLW, not fussed on being spoon fed at all).
DH has three items he won't eat, 2 of which are safe foods for DS, and one of which is from DD's very short list of acceptable vegetables. (Bonus, he feeds himself and manages to get most of it in his mouth 
)
Aside from breakfasts and lunches which I can cobble together to suit everyone individually, I have exactly 3 meals I can cook that suit all three of them (with adaptations). These are:
Spaghetti Bolognese
Curry (if I split part way through cooking and make two different sauces)
Sausages, beans and some sort of potato for everyone except DD who has toast.
I am so beyond stuck it's unreal. Every time I try to meal plan I just burst into tears.
Following yesterday's reaction and DS's medical history I've finally managed to get a referral made for the dietician, and we had a referral made to the dermatologist a few weeks ago.
Does anyone have any tips, tricks or advice? Failing that just some sympathy would be really lovely