Introducing DC to nuts when I myself am severely allergic - any experience or advice please!

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I have an extremely severe allergy to nuts, with high scores on the blood tests for the vast majority of tree nuts and peanuts, and moderate reactions to those I've accidentally eaten. I have only had one truly life threatening reaction, to walnuts, where 2 epipens didn't so much as pause the reaction, but I also react quite severely to peanuts without ingesting them directly (enough to have had to use epipens).

DD (nearly 2) is already under the allergy clinic for mild allergies to dairy and egg and they are advising that I start introducing nuts (very slowly using the ladder method).

I made a start on this with cookies containing hazelnuts and almonds as I am only moderately allergic to these two nuts. A friend made the cookies according to the clinic's recipe and I have been feeding DD increasingly big pieces of the cookies.

I have two problems with this.

1. My allergy may be hereditary (my DF is allergic to nuts too) so I am very wary of feeding nuts to DD when the results could be disastrous if we get onto a nut that she is very allergic to. This led to me feeding her her nut cookie in the A&E car park this morning which feels ridiculous but the hospital is a 30-minute drive which is just too far in an emergency situation.

2. My house is my only safe haven where I know that I am fairly safe from allergens. Nuts never cross the boundary. I cannot see how I can continue doing this with other nuts that I am more allergic to without contaminating the house (At other people's houses I have come out in hives or with a swollen face from contact with allergens - this doesn't feel dangerous but it does mean I'm uncomfortable which is fine from time to time when out and about but I like that I am 'safe' at home.).

Even if I ship DD off to a friend's for the morning to try different nuts, she will need a wash and clean clothes (and mouth and face rinsed out with bleach) before I see her and she is too young to understand that she won't be able to kiss me etc. For this reason I can't see how we're ever going to introduce peanuts unless I send her away for a weekend to do so and only collect her quite a few hours after eating the nuts.

I am horribly torn between making sure that I introduce the nuts to give her a fighting chance of not developing the allergy and protecting my own safety.

I feel as though I'm being overdramatic but I'm a bit lost as to where to go with this.

How have others handled this situation?

Any advice welcome!

Sorry, that was long

Hopeful bump...

You are the same as me! Severely allergic to all nuts but advised to give my DD all nuts as early as possible. I found it really hard but had to suck it up and do it. We started with these Israeli peanut crisps (I’m so sorry I can’t remember the name now but I do still see them in the kosher aisle in the supermarket) that my husband could take my daughter to the park and give her and then clean her hands thoroughly before me touching her!! Then we loved on to peanut butter at my in laws house every now and then and now I let her have nuts as often as possible when we are out. She knows to clean her hands and mouth really thoroughly before touching or kissing me. Very best of luck with it.

Were the doctors who gave this advice actually aware of the severity of your own allergy and the family history? They should have explained what to do or not do in that light.

Oh! Found it by googling! Bamba peanut snack. Try them!

My DS's allergist told us to give our kids those Israeli peanut snacks as soon as we weaned our kids... apparently hardly any Israelis are allergic to peanuts!

And exactly as @ScottishDiblet says... scrub them down after!

Thanks for responding both of you.

Thanks for recommending the peanut snacks ScottishDiblet. Once I think I can explain to DD re not kissing me etc. I will get someone to feed them to her.

Gemma - yes, I did explain to the consultant re the severity of my allergies. They ideally want to do in-hospital nut challenges with DD for peanuts but that clinic hasn't been running for over a year due to staff shortages. DD has another appointment at her allergy clinic next week so I'm hoping to discuss all of this then and find that there is a better of dealing with this.

It doesn't help that I'm a single mum so no husband to take this on for me, so feeding DD the various nuts that are higher on the scale for me will mean drafting in the help of friends.

I massively missed the boat on early introduction of allergens with DD. Despite first having a conversation with my GP about the issue of DD's likely allergies before she was born it took until she was 10 months for us to get a referral.

A family member stood outside her local A&E when she gave her child his first taste of peanut butter.He had excema and asthma and she just thought he was the type of baby to have a nut allergy.When she told me her plan I thought she was being PFB. She wasn't-he had an allergic reaction and she ran him in.

Sounds like madness to me. My dd's consultant said we should only try my daughter on nuts if she is actually going to be eating them regularly and as I have severe tree nut allergies she won't be eating any of those as we don't have them in the house. She had some sensitivity to peanut but I'm not sure whether I'm allergic or not so consultant advised me to have blood test first to make sure we can then safely (for me) keep peanuts in the house before considering trialling dd with peanut (in hospital).

I have a similar severe nut allergy to you. I was old by my allergy consultant to keep nuts well away from my DC. Like you my home is my only true nut free haven and I'm certainly not in a position to introduce nuts to my DC.
I understand the logic but I can't introduce the DC to nuts.