A non-milk, non substitute "milk" for milk

[ZebraZeebra]

I know that's incredibly complicated sounding but please hear me out!

DS has egg, nut, sesame and coconut allergies. For lifestyle reasons, we don't have dairy and he's not keen on rice or soya milk.

Is there a reason we give children a "milky" type thing - I'm thinking specifically around bedtime? He's 14 months and still BFing but at some point, he's going to stop and then...what?

Is there a reason we move them onto another kind of milk - leaving aside nutritional aspects, I mean. If it hadn't been for the coconut allergy, I would have given him the Koko coconut milk but obviously I can't and it's got me thinking. Do I even need to move him onto another milk?

Sorry, these might be really stupid questions. I've just got it into my head that children have something milky at night after they've moved on from BM or formula, and I'm just wondering why.

You could try oat or hemp milk. The only benefit to trying a "milky" type substitute is for calcium & vitamin D. If he doesn't take this I would consider giving a calcium supplement or reconsider your dairy (cows milk use)

I have never given mine anything milky after she weaned. She has water available in the night (and usually drinks some just before falling asleep - maybe she likes the full feeling still).

I know a warm milky drink is meant to help you feel relaxed, full, and therefore sleepy, but if you are able to get a child to sleep without it, then there is no actual need. So long as they are getting the calories and vitamins etc they would get from a milk or milk substitute during the day of course.

He has a super diet and has vitamins so I'm not concerned about it from a nutritional aspect.

I just have it my head you're "supposed" to move them onto something, and I don't know where I got this from.

My kids have never drunk any kind of milk except breastmilk. Supper can help to give toddlers a good sleep, I would give some banana with toast or a crumpet with just water to drink. My kids have never eaten dairy or substitutes.

My DS is allergic to similar, and he absolutely loves oat milk. I buy Oatly with added calcium & vitamins. Have you tried that?

He doesn't need any form of milk so long as he's getting enough calcium from his diet.
Dietician told me to be careful with hemp milk because it contains arsenic. Forgot to look this up but will now.

I'd give a calcium and vitamin D supplement and just give water - or maybe something like chamomile or fennel tea for a warm bedtime drink.

Have you tried a few different brands of soya milk, btw? Some have maltodextrin in them and a nasty aftertaste, but the chilled alpro doesn't and is a lot more pleasant to drink.

You could also try oat milk, though, like rice milk it doesn't have the protein that real milk and soya milk have.

I'd try almond or rice milk, if your health professional agrees.

We give oat milk through the day as a drink but she was bf to 27months as an evening drink. Its nice to cook with as well.

Just a side note. Rice Milk should not be given to children under 5 because of the natural arsenic which it contains building up in their bodies. And before giving large amounts of soya check out the NHS guidelines on soya oestrogens effects in children.

My children did love warm berry tea sweetened with apple juice.

Rice milk has the arsenic issue, too, btw.

Ooooh yes I thought about tea of some kind - chamomile or berry, warmed down in a beaker.

He can't have almond unfortunately, because of the nut allergy - it's specific to almonds.

Oat milk is an idea but I hated it so it didn't occur to me. We just don't have milk, substitutes or real stuff. We have goat's milk yoghurts but DS has yet to acquire a taste but they work well in curries in lieu of coconut milk.

The calcium enriched oat milk is fairly good I think

Those of you that just never gave dairy or substitutes, I'm really interested to hear more, if you have time? I've read a lot of milk debunking myths and researched it a lot so feel comfortable not having cow's milk. But I don't know...I can't seem to let go of this idea of no milk at all!

zebra- there is a lot to suggest that milk is not the superfood that some would like us to believe.
With the introduction of factory farming methods after WWII we had a massive over supply so milk marekting went into overdrive promoting it as a healthy foodstuff.
We don't eat dairy as a family-although my children did have breastmilk until they self weaned. I have tried dairy but my kids think it is rank and stinks.
Many cultures don't consume dairy past toddlerhood, indeed they can't as they quickly lose the ability to digest lactose.
Lactose intolerance is not uncommon here in the West, although less so.

We eat a diet rich in calcium so it's not an issue, meat, fish tofu, eggs, greens, canned fish is a better source of any dairy- especially fish with edible bones - fish and sardines. We eat tofu, I use vinegar in my meat cooking for Asian sauces, sesame and other seeds, rhubarb is very high in calcium too.
I do buy occassional dairy- OH likes Stilton at christmas time and I will eat a bit of cream once in a while, but having a glass of milk or making acreamy sauce is not something we would do.

That's really interesting - thank you. We've focused his diet on protein, "good" fats and naturally occurring carbs. He's never had cereals or grains because we feel like they fill you up but without the same nutritional "bang for your buck" as other foods. He has leafy greens every day - like kale and spinach - has lots of quality organ meat like liver, kidney and heart, lots of oily fish, lots of different kinda of meat and fleshy fish, good fats through butter, avocados, fatty meat , goats milk yoghurt and bone marrow and carbs like sweet potato, green banana and yams. He's had baby biotics since he was four weeks old. I feel like we're pretty clued up in some ways but the milk thing has thrown me a little.

With the coconut allergy I can't give him all the things I want to but I guess it's not such a big deal.

Given your son's allergies you may want to allow him to self wean.

Then you can be sure his need for milk is over.
Many children throughout the world eat no dairy products at all after weaning.

DS1 eats very little dairy. He doesn't like milk, or custard, or rice pudding or creamy sauces and he can't eat cheese (it triggers migraines). I don't worry about it. He loves leafy greens, he'll have the odd bit of lactofree cream on a pud and he likes the occasional alpro pud. He can eat nuts and seeds and has egg sarnies almost every morning. I'm lactose intolerant, so treat (lactofree) milk as an ingredient rather than something to be guzzled in quantity. I do like hard cheese, though, but it doesn't always like me.

I think that's a good idea. He's recently dropped night feeds these last five nights or so and last night he rolled into bed and fell asleep without a breast feed.

So herbal teas like chamomile - are they suitable for young children? Luke warmish obviously!

Just thought I would recommend Pukka organic herbal teas. My toddler has a cup when I do. There are lots of variations and all are delicious . The night time one is really soothing and perfect for a warm cuddling drink. They are great for specific mood enhancers too.