Just Diagnosed - Help!

[Harris090]

Hello everyone

Our DS has just been diagnosed with an allergy to walnuts, sesame, almonds, hazelnuts and egg whites. He had a strong reaction to walnuts which is why he was tested. He's been having hazelnuts on his breakfast for ages, so that was a surprise! Eggs have always made him sick, so we avoid them apart from pasta and the odd bit of cake.

I'm feeling really sad and anxious about how we can manage this and would really appreciate any help and advice on how to manage it all. Does anyone know of any good books? He's only 2 1/2 - how do you explain it all to him without freaking him out? Nursery have been quite straight forward but how do you handle friends / family / eating out? Should we avoid all nuts or just the ones that have been tested? Do you avoid all food stuffs that are produced in a factory where there are nuts or do you just look at the ingredient list? Should we take cake to parties?

Sorry to ask so many questions but my head is spinning!

Hiya, first of all I just want to say your head will stop spinning, things will calm down and life will be become normal for you, as it will just become natural for you.

How allergic is he? What are his reactions etc if he
is life threatening (which it doesn't sound like he is) I would avoid all things that "may contain traces of" if its an allergy that can easily be managed, he should be fine, just obviously be aware just incase.

I just go very careful the first time I give it.

I take food with us everywhere. But if there is food there he can have he has that instead or topped up with stuff I bought.

When we go to birthday parties, toddler groups, friends etc if he can't eat it he can't eat it, i'm hoping DS is young enough he'll out grow he's, but if he doesn't he'll already know he can't eat some foods and unfortunately its just normal for him.
At his party however, I did not have any food he could not eat. I felt his party was his party and he shouldn't miss out there.

I am still paranoid and always read labels (and ingredients change so don't become complacent and rely on it just because last week it was ok. It's silly I have been caught out a couple of times!)

We haven't tried nuts yet. Been told to hang off until he's 3.

I take food with us if we eat out. But I think with your allergies as long as you say when you order they will be able to cater for you.

My friends are great. They all know he can't eat things and some just know I will bring my own so don't worry and some will go out of their way to find things to make for us.

I also find at toddler groups its generally the same people that hand out snack, and they know to ask if he can have it or not. If its someone.e new I just stand close and say no thanks, and hand him something out my bag.

Most children's environments are nut free anyway and as I said, nuts isn't on our list, but we stay away anyway and we've never had a problem.

Your hardest one will be eggs.
May be worth seeing if its eggs in general it if he can have egg whites, egg whites is in more than just egg.
I think egg is our hardest one. We are retesting next month and o really hope we've own grown it!

Good luck. Sorry for the rambling LOL but HTH

Have a look at the coping with pre-school allergies page on the Food Allergy Mums website - I hope it helps, let me know your thoughts

www.foodallergymums.com/index.cfm?fa=contentGeneric.wbxkaqztsddpeysj

It's a big shock at first, but soon you'll get used to it. Hang in there.

There are great baking books for allergy kids out there ( i use and loooove ' the food allergy mama's baking book, its got hte best muffins ever). DD had egg, all nuts, milk, soy and for a time sesame, tomato, sun flower, and whatnot, but it was okay after a while. Not as convenient, obviously. :-)

And they outgrow stuff. Make sure you have a good allergist and an epipen junior if he needs one.

(Plus, your kid will deal with it if he has to. Honestly, there's worse things than not being able to eat cheese.) It'll be okay.

Ladies, thank you so much for all your help and advice. I feel much calmer just reading your posts.... You have so many good ideas, I'm going to go through them all. I love the idea of everything at home being safe. I've just been back at the docs and now have loads of epi pens which is a bit more reassuring. I think this site is going to be so helpful as there is so much to think about! He came home from nursery with an Easter egg that has nuts in it and we're off on an Easter egg hunt on Weds, so I'll have a look at that thread. In the meantime, thanks so much. Harris xxx

Kinnerton will always be your friend for nut-free chocs, they're often available in Supermarkets and things too nowadays. Just check it's from the nut-free part of their range...

Glad you're starting to feel more calm about it all - I remember the feeling just after the diagnosis so well, I kept bursting into tears and everything!

DS was about the same age when he was diagnosed with his nut allergy - we took the view that if we started 'actively' managing it so he could see then he'd just grow up hopefully accepting it. So far it seems to have paid off and now he's 6 he's starting to take some responsibility for it.

With friends and family, whenever we are going somewhere we've always made the point that 'only eat things if mummy or daddy have said it's ok' and have the conversation that even if someone else says it's alright he still has to check. At that age he wasn't really out of our sight for it to matter but it got him in the habit of checking if that makes sense. We still eat out - we just avoid Indian/Chinese/Thai and always make a point of asking about what does/doesn't contain nuts etc - we're now encouraging him to order his own food and do the same. It will become second nature for you all very quickly without really having any impact.

Re nursery and the Easter Egg how about a 'swap box' DS has one which has nut free cake bars/sweets etc in and the rule is if ever there are cakes / sweets etc he can take one but has to swap it for something from his box. We now do the same with party bag sweets at home too.

I do the swap box thing like Acekicker. I also give a treat box to school so the teachers can give a treat when other kids bring in cake etc

Kinnerton-great choc
It's nut free -nice refridgerator egg free cake, cereals, choc and fudge
Fab baking boys- flapjacks

I love the Alice Sherwood allergy book and there is a great recipe for egg free choc brownies in the recipe section of mumsnet.