Nearly eight months sober and still certain I do not want alcohol

[Lemonthyme]

Sober for nearly 8 months now.

A year ago, I would have told you I could never get through my Christmas sober. Never get through my birthday. Never get through time with my family. Never get through the bad times. Never celebrate the good.

But I'm still here. Still very sure I don't want to drink. Even though my partner now thinks I'm too puritanical. I also don't crash out comatose at the end of the day. I also don't spill wine from my hand as I fall asleep because I'm so drunk (once managed that on a hotel pillow). I also sleep really well. Turns out I'm not an insomniac after all.

This is exactly what I needed to read!! Thankyou. I’ve been “ forced” to stop drinking my husband is out of detox and rehab after tipping into extreme alcoholism.
i was drinking more or less everyday so when he was discharged into a dry house I really had to stop.
i am finding it difficult if im honest.
i think the total change in lifestyle is what im finding hard BUt ive managed 8 weeks now. I find getting over that 6 o’clock bump the hardest but am sleeping like a log remembering books I’ve read it things I’ve watched on tv. Spending a lot less money
really hoping i can stick with it.
i cant predict for my husband but thats a whole other story
well done and thanks for that positive message!

Yep same here, been sober since 20th December last night DH & our friends were drinking in the garden they said “oh go on spicegirls.”
I had one sip of cider and just thought “nope I don’t want to be drinking” went back to my ice cold drink of coke and actually had a really good evening, went to bed around midnight and woke up fresh as a daisy while DH was downing water like it was going out of fashion.
I just don’t see the appeal in it anymore.

What do you mean your partner thinks you’re too puritanical?

As long as you don’t wang on about it to others… how can you be puritanical about it?

No problem. It must be SO much harder when you've not come to the decision yourself and it's been more imposed upon you but I can see so many benefits to it.

I don't think I was an alcoholic but my Mum probably is and I could feel I was heading that way. As a result some days are still hard, especially when I've had a difficult day with work but every day I decide not to drink on a hard day, it gets easier.

I don't wang on about it and honestly sex is a lot better sober. So he's not minding that. But since the start, we've both been fairly heavy drinkers. Certainly above the recommended 14 units a week and it's something we often did together.

I think his issue is more that for the first few months at least, I wasn't keen on the idea of going to our local bar (which I'd always loved) because it would be such a source of temptation for me. But we've been back recently and it was fine. We recently went away for the weekend and I drove there and back and to any restaurants we went to which I think he liked. Before, he would drive and I'd regularly drink a couple of drinks to his one.

He's not gone on about it but he did just mention it at the weekend. I think it's also because I'm doing some intermittent fasting to lose weight too so my lifestyle has changed a lot in the past year.

It doesn't bother me. He was being honest about it and he knows I have my own mind on it all so won't change just because he's said that. That's not how our relationship works. Would I like him to be more supportive? Ah, a little but it's not a big deal. It was much harder in the first few months than it is now.

Congrats OP⭐️ I have been dry for a month, miss the glass of wine with food, but not the mornings when I couldn’t remember much about the night before 😁.
All best wishes. 🌺🌺.

Well done OP, that's great! May I just ask, please, what tipped you into making the decision to quit? I've been wavering for a long time and just waiting for something to tip me into quitting. At the moment, the fear is too strong.

A few bad experiences I'd say. Including waking up covered in wine in mainland Europe on a business trip. 🙄

But most of all, I'd realised for some time, I was self medicating my anxiety with alcohol and it was only making that anxiety worse.

Lots of bad stories stick in my head (the business trip being one) but also a comment my son made, c. 2 years ago. I'd poured myself a glass of wine and saw him looking.

"Oh I don't drink every night."

(This was probably a Thursday.)

"Oh I thought you did."

Gut punch.

Six months sober here and I don’t feel any better for it I must say lol. I’m definitely less bloated in the face but that’s about it for me. But I have to not drink due to medications I’m now on and will always need to take.

my weak point is seeing people with a glass of wine on tv. That’s when I want to go get a bottle.

you’re doing great op x

I'd fins a comment like that really hard too @Lemonthyme . Thanks for sharing. Always makes me feel so inspired reading peoples's sobriety successes. Thanks for sharing!

Ah I used to get that too! You really start to notice it don't you? It doesn't bother me so much now and occasionally I open the bottle of wine my partner has open (there's normally one), sniff it, realise it smells far more like vinegar than I remember and how much I don't want it.😆