Two months sober, and suddenly he’s off on another bender. A half bottle of vodka, in one go. Now it will become a litre per day and no food, for a week. No reason to do this. He’s a millionaire, he has just bought a house, he has me, we have just booked a cruise of Norway, everything should be lovely. I’ve been on eggshells waiting for the next one but still here I am awake at 4am with a racing heart, feeling sick, wondering what to do. I’m so glad I refused to live together and I have my own house, because this time last year I was living in a hotel to escape him. Yes I should ditch him, I know. I also know that I would still worry the same amount and possibly worse. It’s just such a terrible waste of a good person, but I’m learning he doesn’t care about anyone, not even himself. I’m waiting for 12 weeks of counselling locally to help set boundaries and take care of myself but really there is nothing anyone can do.