Hi, this is all new to me and I’m not sure how best to support my friend. In summary, we’ve been friends for years but haven’t seen each other in person for a few years and talk sporadically. Earlier this year he told me he was an alcoholic, was no longer working, getting some counselling and going into rehab. Have spoken a few times since then. He relapsed after rehab and last time we spoke he was quite chipper and still seeing a counselllor.
I’ve just spoken to him and he’s drunk and not very coherent, going between being bright, crying and telling rambling stories. Says he’s going back into rehab in two weeks. We spoke for about half an hour but he was rambling and I suggested we talk again when he’s not had as many drinks (he said he’d had loads).
What’s the best approach to take if he calls me drunk? How do I best support him? I don’t want to say the wrong thing or inadvertently be very unhelpful.
my approach has been to be matter of fact, listen, not try to ignore his situation and, just now, to tell him he wasn’t making sense and I wasn’t following his stories.
any tips? I want to be his friend and be caring and supportive but don’t want to get drawn into an unhealthy dynamic which I know can be an issue. Should I call regularly? Lay out boundaries? Say or do anything specific?
we’re not in the Uk btw and I don’t know the details of the rehab or who he’s getting any help from.
thanks for any advice