Sober October Challenge

[KK1983]

Good afternoon 😊

As the title suggests, I have decided to give 'Sober October' my all and go alcohol free for 31 days. This challenge might be a walk in the park for some but this is going to be HUGE for me. In the past 12yrs, I can't even remember the last time I have even gone a week sober, let alone a month!

So, I am a daily drinker. I have 1-2 bottles per day, sometimes more over the weekend. I have a successful job and a beautiful life but my drinking is becoming more of an issue that I ever thought it would be. I think about it more than I want, plan days around it and spend far too much money on it. Alcoholism runs in my family so i'm aware of the signs which is why I need to get a grip asap. I want to be able to moderate.

If you saw me in the street you'd look at me and think I have my shit together. I have the house, the kids, the marriage, the job - the lot! Drinking became a friend when I had none and when I was lonely after my daughter was born and my husband worked nights. Now drinking feels part of my personality, people know me as someone who loves a drink, the life and soul and I used to love that but now, I'm bored of myself.

I have tried to go sober several times but I get to day 4 and give in after finding any tiny excuse to reward myself. Night 1 always feels a bit rough. I role around the bed for hours on end and get a little anxious but nothing too bad. Day 2 I feel hungover without the fun the night before. Day 3 I cry a lot and become quite irritated. Day 4 - I quit! Not this time though, I NEED to do this and I WILL do this.

To help me along the way I have started taking the following vitamins:

• Vitamin B Complex high strength
• Live friendly gut bacteria
• Vitamin B1 500mg x2
• Iron
• Biotin & Zinc
• Vitamin D & K2

Can any recommend anything else or have any tips to help me along the way?

Thank you for taking the time to read this,
Kate x

Same. I'm mostly interested before I eat. Bringing eating forward/having a proper lunch helps.
One day nearly down team!

Yeah i feel the same tbh @needastrongoneagain Around 5pm I get the itch and around now cos I'm sat down watching tv. Today has been fine, day 1 always is, it's from tomorrow onwards I'll be concerned. I've ate A LOT today but it always helps on day 1 so I've enjoyed it 🐷

I usually drink each night. Wine's my thing and my DH and I can easily go through a bottle each. Our work culture is quite boozy which doesn't help. I am determined that I am not going to continue endlessly wasting the money and feeling like I have no self discipline.

Day 1 underway.

Well done everyone - sounds like mostly we are out the ‘danger zone’ in terms of reaching for a drink.

I’m away from home so no kids and no DP (who barely drinks) so I’d normally be ‘making the most of it’ and drinking a load. I went for a run then walked across town to my hotel listening to quit lit. I’m off to bed soon so that’s day 3 done for me. I’m hoping for a decent night sleep tonight. I hope you all get an ok night but for those of you who don’t, try to focus on the fact that it will be a better night tomorrow 😊

@nowinetimeforme Well done on day 3 - amazing! 👏🏻👏🏻

Doing good here, reading the Jason Vale stop drinking book on the sofa with a banoffee Horlicks and ploughing through a family bag of crisps! But hey it's better than wine! Glad to hear everyone is doing well 😊 😊

Hi all. I’ve been reading all the posts. @needastrongoneagain , I’m sorry to read of your husband’s health, things must have been pretty bloody rough on you all.
I can relate to so many of the experiences- the having a couple of days off then rewarding myself by day 3! The struggling to cook a nice meal without a glass of wine, the barely being able to contemplate a weekend without booze! ….yet here we all are for October. I find it’s easier once I’ve eaten so it was an earlier dinner tonight and I know I need to do this daily. This may not be popular with DH but i can’t see me coping otherwise!
well done everyone on day 1. Hopefully we might all sleep better tonight.

Thank you, I don't think I checked the chiller.

Sounds like we’re off to a good start!

As predicted I can’t sleep and DP is snoring so Ive come down to the sofa and will read to see if that can send me off

I also can’t sleep

@Retirementbeckons did you manage to get any sleep? Not sleeping is awful but at least no hangover!

I woke up about 2.00 as I needed the loo and haven't been able to get back to sleep. Last night was my first night for ages without alcohol.

Also been awake since 12.30am, but thanks to an awful cold. So now I feel hungover with a splitting headache, shakes and dry eyes but for once I'm actually not. How unfair!

Morning soberisters! Don’t let the terrible nights sleep get you down. It will get better.

for anyone who is interested, alcohol explained by William Porter has a lot of information on what alcohol does to your body and a whole section on sleep.

Morning, Sober Friends.

Ah, sorry to hear about the folk that didn’t sleep. Hopefully this is a temporary thing while the alcohol leaves our systems.

If it helps, I take magnesium and ashwaganda about an hour before bed. Magnesium has better research behind its benefits that the latter, but it helps me and might be worth a try (it’s a herb).

Thanks for the kindness re DH. It’s been a really shit 3 years in truth, easily and by far the worst time we’ve all been through as a family. Hopefully the lack of self medication with wine will help me process some of the trauma in a more postive way.

This is turning out to be a lovely supportive thread and so many of us seem to have the same triggers and patterns it’s so nice to have folk that really understand ❤️.

Soberisters 🤣

Have you thought about seeking some help to process the trauma @needastrongoneagain1? I guess you haven’t been able to prioritise yourself for even a second since the stroke. You must have a lot of emotions to work through. Sounds like a job for a professional to me 😂 Having said that, we’ll listen, if you ever want to share 😊 x

Morning all, I felt crushingly tired yesterday evening so had an early night, but did wake up several times, though thankfully not for long.

I agree with @needastrongoneagain1 it does sound like we're mostly coming from a fairly similar place in terms of our drinking, so it's lovely to be doing this with people who 'get it'.

Morning gang 😴

According to my apple watch I got a disturbed 4hrs and 5mins sleep. I felt really tired about half 10 so I thought (hoped) I'd just drop off but as soon as the lights went out I was fully alert. My husband chose the best night to play the nose trumpet too so all I could here was his snoring. He probably always snores this bad but the wine usually cushions the blow. I was also really itchy last night, felt like every part of me needed a scratch.

But here we are - DAY 2 🥳

Just having breakfast in bed and watching MAFS before I get ready for work.

Well done on night 1 - We did it!! xx

Morning all and here we go for day 2….

enjoying (if that’s not a bad turn of phrase) reading your updates and own stories as it makes me feel far less alone and far less ashamed.

Im away from work at the moment due to redundancy, I received a decent pay off which has meant with money in the bank and time to spare with no DC at home I’ve had no reason not to drink at least a bottle of wine a day. On days I start earlier, it can easily be two. Now sounds mental
to say that on days I held out until 5/6pm I’d semi congratulate myself!

I don’t even get ‘drunk’ per se which I think is due to tolerance and I do nurse the drinks during the day, but I can’t imagine what it’s doing to my liver and I’ve gained 2 stone in weight over the past year.

I too came from a heavy drinking industry so tbh my overall units have been high for a while but the drinking alone at home in my PJs (and often ordering in via Deliveroo etc rather than leave the house) seems all the more reason to break the cycle.

Anyone else wake up today expecting to feel virtuous and ‘better’ and still feeling the usual meh? It’s at this point I’d often order a bottle to ‘take the edge off’ and soon feel better; before the cycle begins again.

one day at a time…. Sending positivity and solidarity to you all 💙

@Youngatheart00

Anyone else wake up today expecting to feel virtuous and ‘better’ and still feeling the usual meh?

I've done this enough times to know it's not until about day 3 or 4 that things start to improve, which inconveniently usually coincides with the back end of working the week and a feeling that it would be a great idea to celebrate with a drink! Tonight I have planned to have dinner at a friend's and drive home so that should see me through (I am on day 4 now so well and truly in my danger zone 😂)

I can relate to a lot of this. I have 3 days off work a week and instead of doing something productive I use them to go out drinking or drink all day (slowly) at home whilst pottering around the house cleaning, etc. Also, Deliveroo etc was my go to, especially Tesco Whoosh. I swear they stopped asking my date of birth cos they just knew it off by heart 🙈

We're all pretty much in the same boat and we're all wanting to make positive changes so that's a great start at least. Small steps and all that.

@nowinetimeforme Day 4 - Woohooo!!! 🥳👏🏻 Smashing it! x

@KK1983 Thank you... I am feeling positive today but TBH, I've done the first 3/4 days a lot and I have always then just drunk extra on 3/4 days left of the week. Sometimes I'd get straight back on the wagon the following Monday and do the same again, sometimes, It would bleed into a bottle of wine a night for the following week before I tried again. I think if I can crack this weekend that will signify a big change for me because I've not gone more than a week without drinking since my last pregnancy, almost 2 years ago.

Well done for day 1 - tonight you will sleep a bit better. We'll all sleep a bit better.

My DH is a fabulous cook and said that he was going to put red wine into a particular dish he was going to make tomorrow night (so on day 3 for me). I asked him not to on the principle that we would only drink the rest. He isn’t going to now and I am stupidly proud of myself 🤣