Drinking at a weekend in 40’s

[Creek2025]

I’ve always been a social person but feel like now I’m in my 40’s I really need to stop drinking as much when I go out.

I can’t always remember bits of the night.

I don’t drink in the week or at home I’m more of a binge drinker on a Saturday when I’m out with friends I don’t have a stop button.

it takes me days to feel better a lot of my friends also take coke when out how do I come away from this or just drink less when I’m out.

I don’t feel the need to have a drink unless I’m out at a weekend but feel like I need to grow up I’m in my 40’s not 20’s and it really isn’t a good look and the amount of money I spend is ridiculous.

If you don't remember everything that happened, can you be sure you didn't take coke as well?

You need to decide what you actually want to do here. You want to stop drinking as much but admit you don't have an off switch?
Do your friends feel the same? Maybe they do and want the same as you? Have you tried suggesting something different as a get together?

You either come away from this and just say no to going out, suggest a different form of social activity, OR you get into AF drinks when you're out and see how that works for you. Just try something to break the habit.
I grew out of the big nights but believe me I remember them (or not). I'm now stopping altogether after years of on and off and, like you, feeling like it really isn't a good look... but your mileage may vary.

I faced this in my 30s (well, not the coke but the boozy nights out!)

where does all the drinking happen - is it pubs and bars?

I told everyone I was on a bit of a diet and only drinking G&T. Then I’d just buy tonic water, lemonade or even just a lime and soda. I’d ask for extra extra ice so it would melt and last ages. I’d make sure I finished my drink at a different time to everyone else so I could buy a drink outside rounds. Everyone else usually too trolleyed to notice or care.

You need to stop if you have no off switch. I couldn't be arsed with drunk coke heads, perhaps you've outgrown your friends as well. It takes a while to get used to and there's a certain amount of fear involved but let go. After a while being sober doesn't bother you.

This is a great idea and yes I can’t image anyone even noticing just the tonic

Yes I do feel like this I’ve moved out of where I lived a few years back so my friends here are not who I’ve grown up with my friends like a night out back in my hometown but not all the time like these, definitely feel I’ve gone back 20 years.

Yes I do suggest other things but seems as though people just want to do things that involve drink or ends up involving drink. I have actually been taking up other activities like gym classes to meet other people who don’t want to just drink. It’s like a few turns into a full day and night out.

When you say coke, are you referring to the drink?

I am in my 40s and I don’t really know anyone who is out drinking every weekend. Yes, some people drink, but we’re more in the staying home phase of life or doing other things, like running clubs and wild swimming and yoga and pottery classes. It sounds like what you need is new friends to a degree.

If people say, let’s go out partying, you can say no. Or you can say, do you want to go see a film, do a class, go hiking, whatever instead.