Advice about child contact, alcoholic ex

[18000lostchances]

Posted previously, my partner hid £18k of drinking debt from me. He moved out in Jan but we have 2 DD, 4 years and 7mnths.

He won't stop drinking. Tells me he will stop, says he wants to stop but then after a day or two he claims he realises he doesn't need to, so starts again.

What do I do about contact? We had informally agreed every other weekend and Tuesday overnight for my 4yr old. No contact with baby except the odd hour or two now and then. I can't send my kids to him overnight though knowing he will drink.

He claims it's only a pint here and there. You don't run up £18k debt on a casual beer. He's rarely obviously drunk but never a day off the beer. He is still working (as an NHS doctor!!) but he is lying to work and telling his supervisor he's getting support to quit.

I will call a lawyer today but what should I expect? He is threatening to go for 50:50 contact and I just want to know my daughters are safe.

Do you have any evidence that he is a heavy drinker? He can threaten 50/50 all he wants it will cut into his drinking time so it's probably just a threat

Not really. I don't know how I would get evidence. His bank statements show pub after pub after pub every day, but I don't have access to his bank statements now he's gone.

He didn't answer his work e-mail for 4mnths and there have been work repercussions (he was drinking very heavily at that time) and they will have an e-mail trail about that, but again doubt his HR would share with me. That will be confidential.

You are maybe right he won't bother pursuing contact. I asked for family mediation but both parties have to complete the forms and he hasn't bothered so it's been rejected by the mediation service at this time.