What can relatives/friends do to help?

[cloudjumper]

We have recently found out that my lovely SIL is an alcoholic, and has been for years. No one would have every suspected it, and we're still trying to process the news. DH and his brother are trying to figure out what to do, but it is so difficult. She is in total denial and will not engage with anyone, neither with her DP, her siblings, her best friend etc.
She is at risk of losing everything - she hasn't got a job at the moment, is massively behind on mortgage payments for her flat (for which she can't find tenants since the previous ones moved out) and is fully dependent on her DP - who is now stopping to give her money for alcohol. Tbh, I would not be surprised if he left her...
Her health is really bad due to her alcohol consumption, and again, she is not willing to address this.

DH and his brother are going to try and meet with her next weekend, but chances are that she's either going to refuse, or if she does meet, she'll walk off when they try to discuss this with her.

Is there anything we can do at all? From what I have read/heard, until she admits that she has a problem and agrees to get help, it seems that there is very little (if nothing) that anyone can do to help. I feel so sorry for my DH who has always been really close to his sister. One of his friends died due to alcoholism, so this is extra hard on him. He also wouldn't accept help.
So we just have to stand back and watch until she hits that turning point?

Al Anon were very helpful when a good friend of mine was an alcoholic, (he subsequently died.) I can remember them saying that he would only help himself when he hit rock bottom, (I thought he already had but they said not.) There's not much you can do, unfortunately, other than don't enable it; and ensure you prioritise your own MH and wellbeing because alcoholics, like any addict, are highly manipulative.

I also recommend Al-Anon.
But yes sadly all you can do is basically watch - if they don't want to get better there is little you or anyone else can do. I watched my aunt do this, drank herself to death over about 5 years - she sadly died in January at just 50.
We begged and pleaded but ultimately they have to want to help themselves. My aunt never hit rock bottom, as cruel as it sounds I hope your SIL does because then she might have a chance of recovery.
I wish you all well.

Can I ask what happens at an Al-Anon meeting please? And it is faith/religion-based?

Smart Recovery is an alternative to the AA for family and friends. They have online/face to face meetings. And also have a book, which is really useful.

https://smartrecovery.org.uk/smart_family__friends/

There is nothing you can do except look after each other. It's a cruel ride.

Thank you, I will have a look x