Husband drinking while driving

[nausicaa35]

i just caught my husband driving back from the shops drinking a beer. I lost it with him as I can’t understand how a reasonable person would think that’s OK, and also a good example to set to the children (although they weren’t in the car).
He lost it with me as though I’m the unreasonable one - he said ‘f*k your valentines day’, called me a c*t, the works.
He is upstairs sulking while I’m downstairs absolutely fuming with him but trying to act normal for the kids.
Is it normal and OK to drink while driving, even if you’re not over the limit? I’m starting to question my sanity here.

Of course it isn't normal or legal .
Bloody hell . I wouldn't let him drive his kids anywhere. Until he seeks help.
But really I would re think a relationship like this altogether.
Addiction makes people very mean and selfish

"Is it normal and OK to drink while driving, even if you’re not over the limit?"

What do you think the police would say and do if they spotted him swigging a beer whilst driving?

Exactly.

Your husband sounds awful. What's the relationship like usually?

Normal in no country on the planet. Not remotely.

Is he an alcoholic? If he is, he's probably already drink driving as he may be over the limit in the morning.

What's the plan?

It is not normal. Although I have not known my DH to drink while in the car, he is widely known for having 3-4 beers with his mates and then drive home. He thinks nothing of it. I have made it crystal clear that if he is arrested or he hurts himself or anyone else, I am filing for divorce.

You know he's drink driving? What if he kills or disables someone?

As soon as someone called me a c*nt, I'd be out that door. That's not what normal people call their partner.

Wtf? You're going to wait until he hurts or kills someone before you do anything about it?

None of it is normal. I would be reporting him to the police for the drinking and divorcing him for the abuse.

Not strictly true! In Australia you are allowed to drink one mid strength beer per hour when driving.

When you go to the bottle shop and order a crate of beer, the shop guy takes one of the cans out to give the driver - they call it a “roadie” - it completely blew my mind the first time it happened to DH!

Bit @nausicaa35 - no, this is not okay, no is his reaction towards you when challenged.

Wow! Just 😲.

Might Australian beer be quite low in alcohol compared to European beers??

Are you genuinely asking if it is normal to drink alcohol and drive at the same time?

If you are genuine where have you been living? and who else do you know that does it so we can report ot to the police

And why are so many people on here in the last few weeks asking if things are normal?

3.5 -4.5 % alcohol for a “mid-strength” beer.

In parts of Australia, drink driving is less of a social no-no than not liking sport! I used to go out for drinks after work and we’d all have nearly a bottle of wine each and everybody drove home after except me! And these were “professional” colleagues.

On a Friday afternoon, the tradies (manual workers) finish at 230pm and head to the pub - they park their massive utes/trucks outside, have a fair amount to drink then drive home - these utes packed with tools and equipment would be literal death machines if they hit you.

I think it’s partly that it dates back to the times when certain areas were very rural and there wasn’t much traffic on the roads. Plus out in the suburbs, there aren’t a lot of pubs so people might be drinking in a pub that’s miles away from their house. But yeah, drink driving is not the no-no it is here. But if you don’t like sport - social pariah!

So sorry your valentines day was rubbish. As was mine for reasons also to do with alcohol. Your husband sounds like a nasty person and I'd never speak to my partner like the way he spoke to you. His behaviour is dangerous, selfish and irresponsible.

The drinking is one thing - I would question why he felt he needed to and why he couldn’t just wait until he got home, although if it was genuinely the I only beer he’d had then he wouldn’t be over the limit.

However, I think the immediate main issue here is calling you a c*nt - this is absolutely not ok. Even if you were being unreasonable (which you absolutely weren’t) there is still no way in which is reaction is remotely acceptable. No one should live with someone who speaks to them like that. So sorry OP. You’re worth more than this.

I used to work in a tollbooth. The amount of men driving through with a can of lager was quite high