Dry January and beyond

[BulldogMumma]

I couldn't find a dry January thread so thought I'd make one.
I've posted on the alcohol threads before but never see it through. This year I'm determined to do dry January and even beyond.
My drinking has really crept up lately and I know I need to address it. I lost my mum this year due to alcohol and I don't want to go the same way. I've been using alcohol as a crutch since losing my mum but now's the time I stop relying on the wine and take back control.
Anyone else who wants to join me are more than welcome, would be good to have some buddies along the way x

Yes I'm feeling intrepid about the weekend. It doesn't take much to break my resolve. DH and I are going to go to the cinema on Friday. I'm meeting a friend for lunch Saturday but she doesn't drink and I'll be driving so no temptation there.
I am going away on the following weekend so I will have a drink then as weirdly I don't drink as much when I'm away as I would at home.
I like to keep my wits about me when I'm in a foreign city.

One week done whoop!
Benefits so far as much improved sleep, feeling overall calmer and more pressure with kids (and DH), brighter eyes/skin (nothing that would be noticeable to others really but it is to me, drinking makes my eyes quite glazy) and less bloating.
I've been more of a beer drinker these days, and occasional gin (I do like wine but I stopped drinking it regularly years ago as it made me depressed, more so than any other kind of booze). Caught sight of myself in a full length mirror a few times over Xmas and was horrified at the belly, this was admittedly also quite a big factor in wanting to quit!

everyone is doing amazingly however far you’ve got! It’s great that we’re all here trying together, it’s really helping me!

Day 9 here and suddenly feeling less bloated & my face was markedly less puffy than usual this morning! Sleeping well skin looking clearer and for the first time thought I can do this & more importantly I can still enjoy life while I do this!

now this is a danger sign for me often once I feel like I’m achieving I’ll self sabotage & think oh well I’ve proved I can do it now so one won’t hurt…

I'm checking in to say I will keep going and if I start thinking this I’ll make myself come on here before I do anything. Self sabotage is not my friend and I need to change how I respond to my thoughts (not just in relation to alcohol but one step at a time!!)

Oh and just discovered the Traitors which is providing some much needed distraction in the evenings!!

Checking in for day 8! I would normally use midweek as an excuse to “treat” myself to a glass (bottle 🙈) of wine. Got in some af wine incase I need it.

Feeling less bloated so happy about that. On dry app my wine habit has saved me ££££ and nearly 4000 calories. That’s something to feel good about so I’m feeling very positive (even though it’s -5 and heading into work)

So glad I found this thread 🌷

Morning all! One week down 😀Well done to us all ❤💫🎉

Can I ask if anyone else is dreading the weekend??? I know it sounds dramatic! But Friday evening is when we get home after work, both get a shower / bath and then pour a glass and start cooking dinner. Then once we've eaten, get the fire on and get cosy on the sofa with a bottle of wine.

Saturdays we would usually take the dogs for a big walk early afternoon and then stop at a local pub with lovely big wood burners, let the dogs snooze and dry off and have a couple of glasses of wine.

Sundays would be cooking a big Sunday roast with a bottle of red on the go...

All of it just feels a bit 'meh' without the alcohol - and I know that sounds so sad (but it is how I knew I had a problem I guess).

Apart from AF drinks (which I'm just not a fan of - sorry!!!) is there any way to fill this gap?! (bearing in mind it's January and we're skint 😂)

@Starlight1984 this is exactly how I feel and if I cave at any time i know it will be during the weekend. I don't think it means you have a problem btw - I think it's fine to use alcohol to elevate a nice situation like a pub lunch or whatever. It's when you end up doing it mindlessly at home every night for no real reason other than it's become habit (which is the territory I got into towards the end of last year) that it's a real problem and your units creep up.

I don't plan to give up entirely because I value those situations and elevations and do believe at the end of a working week I deserve something I enjoy whether that's a drink or a takeaway or a long lie in. Whatever.

But I just want to pair it right back so it's that weekend drink only, not every night.

That said I'm really enjoying the energy and the lack of grogginess. It's just bloody dull.

Still so ill 🤒. I'm off work feeling very sorry for myself, I don't remember the last time I was so wiped out by a cold.
@Starlight34 your weekends sound so lovely 😍

• @Starlight1984 your weekends sound so lovely 😍

Thank you 😊 They were. Prior to the 1st January 😂Now it's just me pacing round the kitchen and digging in the cupboards for chocolate or crisps or anything to take my mind off having a drink!

Yeah I guess part of our issue was that our weekends were lovely and chilled and if we could have left it at that, it would have been fine. But then it would start drifting into the week.

Wine leftover from Sunday? We'll finish it Monday night with dinner.

Had a bad day at work? I'll pick up a bottle of wine on the way home.

Still half a bottle left? No worries we'll finish it off the next night. And maybe buy another bottle as half isn't really going to be enough for two of us!

Argh!

Morning all. Day 8!! Had a Corona 0% last night, which was really refreshing. I was out for a walk and popped into Tesco on a whim, after some people on here mentioned it. An added motivation for keeping going was standing in the queue with my virtuous basket behind a couple with two six packs of actual beer and a huge bottle of vodka. I know it's wrong to judge the contents of other people's shopping trolleys but I can't help myself but it was hard not to notice!

Speaking of supermarkets, someone I used to know used to get over the Friday night urge to drink by completely changing their routine and doing their weekend shop at 10pm. He had to stay sober in order to drive there. The added advantage was that the supermarket was practically deserted at that time 😃.

I'm already starting to think about what the return to drinking will look like. Last year I found that my tolerance had reduced significantly, and even a small glass had quite an effect, so I will be starting off slowly. My ultimate goal is to have two alcohol free days per week, and a maximum of 1 large (250ml) glass the rest of the week. I achieved the second part last year, but the days off were few and far between by the summer. I know I can do it. It's just odd that taking one day off is harder psychologically than abstaining for the whole of January (or maybe it's just me that's odd 😉).

Good luck all. We'll be 25% of the way there by the end of today 😃!

@Starlight1984 yes that's exactly how I got. It was as if it was no longer a treat or anything special, just part of my daily routine. I didn't stop to think about units or how it was affecting my health, I just drank out of habit. It wasn't even doing anything for me when it got that regular.

But yes cosy weekends by the fire or at the pub or over Sunday lunch do feel flat without a drink, as sad as that sounds.

@fuzzylegs33 @Starlight1984 , yes, yes to all this! Highly relatable.

I am enjoying focusing on the positives this time around ( been trying for years to some extent or other), on repairing and restoring. Healing. Although yet to see any outward physical benefits, I am happy to think good things are at work within.

And the knowledge I now have re alcohol, units, damage is such that I am determined to live a drier life, but allow myself some leeway for the occasions you mentioned so delightfully!

I want a life of balance and joy. In fact I think balance will be my mantra/ san culpa for the year.

Day 8, good luck today everyone!

This is soooo familiar.
I love going for winter walks followed by a cosy pint of ale in a local pub. Just does not hold the same appeal without alcohol. I don't what to replace this with! I guess just the walk and then go home with a 'what now?' feeling...

I'm so glad it's not just me!

Yes, this is exactly how I feel. I don't want to give up a nice glass of wine, but it has to stop being a nightly habit.

I'm not sure if it's possible, but I'll soon know!

My weekends are similar and I really don't know how to differentiate between a boring working week and a lovely weekend with out a nice glass of something. I don't hold out much hope for me getting through

Exactly! How do you limit it to just the weekend without it filtering into the week days?

I think when you don't get drunk and don't feel ill the next day (we only ever have 2-3 glasses if we do drink during the week so not enough for a hangover) then you justify it as being fine and not having a problem...

@Starlight1984 , I don't think there is anything wrong with having a small glass or two of wine (or whatever) every day, and it's not something I beat myself up over as long as I don't overdo it. There's plenty of evidence to suggest that moderate drinking is at worst neutral in terms of health outcomes, and at best carries with it some advantages (especially red wine). Limiting consumption to the weekend works well for some people though, as long as you're not tempted to binge to make up for it, or if it makes you miserable.

My plans (best laid, an' everything 🤭) is to do DJ, then reassess.

I want to maybe just have a weekend drink or 2, or two nights of the weekend when I'll allow myself a couple of glasses. Maybe I will try and just say 'Weekend is over, no more wine till next one, end of', like I'm saying 'No wine in Jan.'

My plan is to stick to a couple of glasses of wine on a weekend, not a couple of bottles! Really hope I can moderate my drinking. Time will tell..

evening all, Day 8 done and dusted. Lovely to think a quarter of the way there. And I now have a genuine excuse as have been put on v strong painkillers following the winter bug as I've pulled something through coughing (this could only happen to me, sigh) so cannot do any alcohol now anyway.

Picking up the discussion above - we also have a dog so do the long walk/pub thing when we can at the weekend. What we took to doing was going to a dog-friendly cafe instead and having a hot chocolate/cup of tea and slice of cake, or an ice-cream in the summer. Would that work? You still get the treat but not the units. We're lucky in that we live in a touristy area so we have the option of beach walks and there's no pub by the beach, so ice-cream/hot chocolate it is.

But yes, it's the sitting watching TV with a naice glass is the thing that I'm missing the most. Though it really had got to the stage of a bottle a night, like others, so definitely needed a reset through DJ.

The issue with me is that ideal picture of having a glass of wine near the fire in a country pub - is that the reality is that I can’t just have the one. I’ll go on and on pick a bottle up on the way home, carry on the next day, smoke cigarettes- then when hanging get a takeaway, do zero exercise all weekend. Then before I know it I’m back at work and have just spent the weekend drinking.

if I carry on like this it doesn’t make me happy, it makes me unwell and miserable and it all adds up.

I went to the pub last night and they had a deal on of a hot drink and a pudding. I got a pot of tea and a brownie and it really was lovely. I didn’t feel like I was missing out at all.

Day 9 here and I am more like @Sammy900 with my drinking. Wasting my weekends drunk or hungover. Feeling ill until I start again. I also cannot have one glass, which is fine if I only drank every now and again but it’s every weekend and I’m dog tired. I’m still set on the whole year dry and I feel quite excited about what I will achieve this year without alcohol.

Well one way to take my mind off wine was to do my tax return 🤣 I had dairy milk instead. I needed the sugar!