Always an alcoholic?

[PigsinBlankets22]

Once someone has been alcohol dependent and spent a huge portion of their life drinking but was then successfully detoxed and went to rehab....can they really just stick to 'a couple of drinks' if they start drinking again? I think not...?

Seems v unlikely. Am sorry.

No they will always be a alcoholic even if they have it under control.

Yes. Always an alcoholic.

I know someone like this. Stopped drinking for a few years. Then it was just one beer a day. Then it was a couple of beers. Then it was the odd spirit. Then it became drinking two litres of cider every morning. Then he had to go into a hospital and a residential home. Not long after that, he died (shortly after drinking a litre of cider for his breakfast).

My son’s Godmother is an alcoholic. She’s not had a drink for 30 odd years. Still describes herself as an alcoholic…

They were sober about 5 months, which is nothing. They didn't think they had a significant alcohol problem anyway but were alcohol dependent. Thinks they are in control and won't get into that state again. Long history of being a chronic liar also.

The size of those ‘couple of drinks’ will increase rapidly! They are kidding themselves, or trying to kid you.

Run. Absolutely no such thing as an ex alcoholic. Do yourself a favour and live a happy, calm life.

My mother in law. She gets clean, stays that way for a month or so. Then it’s ’just A drop’. Then it’s ‘just a small one’. Then it’s ’I’m only having one’ and it increases and increases til she’s back to where she starts.

We have watched her choose drink over her sons, her sisters, her husband and now her grandchildren. It’s the most depressing thing to watch someone kill themselves in slow motion. She’s 74 in May. She won’t see 80. Tbh on the worst days, I’ll be amazed if she reaches 75.

With her, it’s a case of once a drinker, always a drinker.

They lost someone close to them from the effects of alcohol, mid sixties, hence detox and rehab however that still doesn't seem to have been a deterrent. Old habits die hard....

No, maybe there are a few people out there with magical powers who can, but these things get wired into neural pathways. On motivational level, you may be able to change your mindset around alcohol to no longer be attracted to binge drinking and only want to have 1 or 2 drinks and then stop. But on a much deeper physiological level, the reward centres in the brain, if you are someone who has had a drinking problem, are well worn to want more and more, if you have any.

You may on occasion, especially at first, be able to moderate. And we see this with people who have stopped drinking and then decide they want to start up again and be a 'normal' drinker. They can do it a time or two. Maybe even more than that. But eventually 1-2 drinks will become well, what's one more? 3-4 drinks. Becomes drinking Sunday at lunchtime. Becomes a Wednesday evening out. Becomes every day and heavy drinking again. Unfortunately, as you said, it's not uncommon for people to lie about and hide their drinking when it starts to slip again - so they may be 'moderating' on a Saturday with 1-2 drinks with friends, but they will hide the extra bottle of wine they have when they get home or they'll hide the weekday drinking.

I like the analogy that having a drinking problem is like being on a lift that only goes one way. You can get off on any floor you want and you don't have to hit bottom to decide to get off. But if you decide you want to get back on, the lift doesn't suddenly go back up. It will only go down. Alcoholism is by definition progressive. You can't go backwards once you're heading in that direction.

Nope!! Sometimes people manage it for a short while but..... no

Only about 28% of people stay off of alcohol after rehab. Rehab is surprisingly ineffective

I have a friend who is an alcoholic but has been sober for a few years. She describes it as being a bit like an allergy. If she avoids alcohol, she's fine but if she were to start drinking she probably wouldn't know how to stop. She doesn't think the 'allergy' will ever go away.

Not possible. My DSis; DP is 12 years sober this year and still describes himself as an alcoholic.

My late husband thought he could stop and have just a few drinks, this despite two shots at rehab, the loss of his marriage, his kids and his job.

8 months later he was dead.

I don’t think so , no. An alcoholic is addicted to , and dependant on , alcohol . I have seen my husband try and give up before , or cut down and as soon as he has a drink he don’t want to stop . Even if it’s just a few beers on an evening and he’s not drunk - the next day he will do it again and the next and so on . My husband could go out and have a beer with food and leave and maybe come home and not drink again but deep down I know he’s waiting for the next . After a few days of not drinking I know any day he will start again .

Hes 12 days sober now , very early days but for the first time ever he has said the words “ I am an alcoholic “ and reached out for support and seems motivated by the AA meetings . I’m hoping this is it as it’s the last chance for our marriage. If another drink passes his lips , I’m leaving .

I do. These days I drink rather less than average but I am "an alcoholic". I still love getting drunk - I do it maybe twice a year - and, the rest of the time, I have to remind myself not to keep drinking once I've had a couple.

It was an objective of mine, and I'm proud of it. I first tried drinking normally after 8 months sober with two or three meetings a week. I was okay for a couple of months, but my life was falling apart at the time and it was just too tempting to go out with friends and pretend everything was okay, then keep it going on my own at home ...

I knocked it on the head again, I can't remember how long for. Longer than a month; less than a year. Second go around, I was much more careful. I slowly established my levels, which is what every alcoholic claims they can do 😂 Maybe I just wanted to prove I really can!

Life did fall apart; I've been homeless twice since then and did NOT "get through it" by drinking. Not that I never felt like it: of course I did; I'm an alcoholic.

@KasenBarrett - astonishingly, my liver & kidney function are fine and my platelet count's above normal (which is a problem not alcohol related). But I have seen a woman whose blood vessels collapsed through alcohol; she started bleeding through her skin pores 😢

I’m an alcoholic. I always will be, despite not having had a drink now for 8 years. I can never drink again, not even a glass of shandy or a sip of champagne for a wedding toast. I know that if I do, within a month I’ll be full blown drinking at every available opportunity. It took me nearly losing my home, husband, job and whole life before I finally managed to kick alcohol to the kerb and I will never touch it. It really is the only way.