Have I become alcohol-dependent?

[sorrythatwasme]

Hi all. So I've been drinking for over 20 years since age 14 and never really stopped, aside from having a baby (couple of years break!) and have got a point where I can hold my drink and put away 2 bottles of red/6 pints and be quite merry, over a nice period, not be drunk just merry, and cursedly feel not just fine the next day, but feel brilliant – this means I carry on as no immediate negative effects.

Yet if I don’t drink for 4-5 days (the max I ever do without submitting to a couple of bottles for my evening/ happily cleaning about the house, feeling so relaxed with that glass of red, start about 7pm and by midnight I'm having a bop to some old tunes. Or I have a weekly night out where it's on the pint) that’s when I wake up aching all over and feeling hungover.

What's that about?

I only drink because it makes me feel good and doesn't stop me functioning at all. School run, work the next day, all absolutely fine. But when I don’t drink I'm kind of more tired or more achy than normal?

I know that no alcohol is good and I would love to quit but that’s a whole other issue that I'm working on.

It's withdrawal. We often think about withdrawal as the hangover you get the morning after drinking. But for people who stop drinking, they usually feel worst 3-5 days after their last drink, not the morning after. It's actually the period when people are most likely to die from acute withdrawal. There is even something called Post-Acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS), where you will get symptoms of withdrawal months, up to even 2 years after quitting heavy drinking.

2 bottles of wine is a huge amount of alcohol for one woman to drink in one night.

But to answer your question, it's hard to say if you have become alcohol dependent. You can experience withdrawal even after a heavy weekend - it doesn't necessarily mean you are addicted to alcohol. But the best way to answer that question is to ask yourself if you could stop?

I was diagnosed with a health condition a few years ago where the general advice is to stop drinking any alcohol. When I first found out, my first thought was not, 'omg, I have this lifelong condition that can never be cured!' or 'god, I've got to take 20 tablets a day now!' It was, 'fuck, how will I be able to keep drinking?!?' I couldn't believe life could be so unfair as to take that one thing away from me. That should have been a sign! (It wasn't at the time, I kept drinking a couple more years).

If you can take it or leave it, you don't have a problem. If the idea of quitting fills you with horror, as it would most of us who drink heavily, then yes, you are probably alcohol dependent. Physically, yes, possibly, if you are having some withdrawal symptoms, but certainly on a psychological level. Fwiw, I quit and now have no desire to have a drink, which is astonishing after 20 years of fairly heavy drinking. But I laugh now to think that this thing I was terrified about losing is now a complete turnoff to me.

Thanks all and thanks @mindutopia

It does not fill me with terror but it is not a favourable option. I just love drinking red wine, chilling, or pints when I go out..... yes there's a dependency there of some kind, which sucks!

I'm not sure I can quit cold turkey. I think what I will do is limit myself and gradually reduce.

I gave up once in my 20s for four months. I had a better time than when I drank. I know this. So why on earth do I carry on? So weird.

regular alcohol consumption can lead to physical dependence, where your body becomes accustomed to having alcohol in your system. When you suddenly stop drinking, your body may react with withdrawal symptoms, such as aches, fatigue, and feelings of being hungover. This could be the reason you feel better when you resume drinking.

Well, it's worth noting that while you might feel fine in the short term, long-term alcohol consumption can have serious health consequences. If you're considering making changes to your drinking habits, it's a good idea to consult a professional for alcohol dependence treatment. They can provide you with personalized advice and support tailored to your situation. Remember, making positive changes to your health and well-being is always a worthy endeavor.

Thank you all and @mswag32

Do you think it's possible that I'm having withdrawals from my habit?

I will drink excessively, 2 bottles of red/or about 6 pints of beer, every four days.

My circumstances put me where it is easy to drink. I am under no illusions that this is not a choice I'm making though.

I do wish to change but am realistic about my willpower.

Is this enough to put me in withdrawal?

Also, will this mean social services involvement as I am a parent. It literally doesn't affect my parenting as I get her to school and back every single day and am present and all is in order in the house etc. etc. etc.

But if I can drink while she's in bed to these levels I know it's not good.

I've been sober for nearly 2.5 years and I wound up having to taper to quit safely. I got stuborn and sick of not being in control. I don't miss it now.

I've saved over £18,000 (not adjusted for inflation). I have an app that keeps track of my days sober and savings, I dread to think how much money I wasted before calling quits.

Amazing! Congratulations. 👏

@montecarlo7 Well done you! :)

It's @LouHey who achieved this, not me 😁

Well done to @LouHey
it's not easy

How are you getting on @sorrythatwasme?