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Alcohol support

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New baby

7 replies

sunnyday2022 · 21/06/2023 21:38

I’ll try not to make this too long. I’m in my 30s, I’ve been with my partner for three years and we’ve got a 5 month old baby. We dated for a while and during that time I wasn’t aware of the extent of his negativity, or drinking problems. The honeymoon period was lovely and things moved pretty quickly.

He told me on our fourth date he did previously have a problem with alcohol in the sense of loss of control after a drink I.e. couldn’t stick to one. He told me he had addressed this by going to AA meetings and he was also having therapy. I felt reassured by this conversation and told him I’m looking for stability and to settle down with the right person. he has had a couple of episodes where he’s had a drink and been a bit mean , or disrespectful. I’ve brushed it off as a few too many.

Anyhow, fast forward and we’ve moved into our house together, we’ve got a baby and two dogs. I love the life we have created, but I’m so unhappy with the amount he drinks. He holds down a job and is responsible, but everything is about drinking. He can’t just enjoy a singular beer in the sun. It’s always just one more. If we’re not drinking, it’s not fun. He refers to his son as a chore and I do 90 per cent of his care so basically feel like a single parent. His main interest in socialising and events. He doesn’t do it as much as he would like because of me, but when he’s with me I feel like he resents his life with me. He says he loves me, but then says he feels trapped in his life with me. Which is quite painful to hear. Hes super disrespectful to me at times, especially when he’s had a drink. Earlier he told me to shut up because he was relaxing. I was trying to talk to him. I’m not really in a position to leave at the minute with a young baby, but I don’t know how to handle his drinking habits. I do try and moderate his drinking out of self preservation and not wanting to deal with the drunk version, but then he refers to me as controlling. I don’t want my son to witness his dad conducting himself in this way. I have told him if he continues in this manner, I’ll eventually have to leave because of our son and wanting him to grow up in a unhealthy environment. I’ve begged him to return to therapy, but he wont. Should I be taking a more supportive stance on this - I genuinely am clueless I’ve not been in this position before. Im a new first time mum and I’ve recently had a c- section and diagnosed with a hyperactive thyroid. Im also running a business and the house. I feel burned out from the stress of life and also trying to handle his emotional woes. An example, today he woke up in a bad mood and said it’s impossible to do anything with a baby and referred to the beach as in taking a trip. I just said I appreciate it’s more awkward, but it’s completely possible if you engage the right mindset. He kept going on about it and I ended up feeling sad for my son. Then later on I decided to come up with a schedule so I can get some sleep at least once a week as I’m doing all the nights and most of the day care. He was just so uninterested and is unsympathetic as to how burnt out I am. Im really at my wits end here and don’t know how to handle my business…

OP posts:
Hopingforagreatescape · 21/06/2023 21:57

I wonder if he has male PND? The adjustment to having a baby around can be really hard, and yes, taking a baby to a beach is a bit more complicated than two adults going alone, but babies don't stay babies for long.... Could be worth him seeing the GP re PND rather than self-medicating with alcohol.

SparklyShark · 22/06/2023 23:47

How much does he drink? How frequently?

I might be reading this wrong but my interpretation is that he is basically an alcoholic (I would say that the fact he went to AA previously suggests he has a long-term and serious issue). It sounds like he is an active alcoholic in denial, and is resentful of anything and everything he perceives as getting in the way of feeding his addiction - 'social' trips, going to the beach... Are these just drinking binge ideas?

I think it is understandable to feel sad for your son here. The thing is - until your partner admits he has a problem, and takes steps to address his drinking problem, he is burying his head in the sand and will continue to sink further into addiction. And ultimately that will impact his son.

I know lots of people recommended AlAnon, which is support for people affected by someone else's alcoholism. I haven't used it myself but it seems like that is something you might like to look into for support/information.

My advice to you would be to think seriously about what you are willing to accept for yourself and your son. What you are willing to live with. Then set that boundary with him, and stick to it. For example, if you still want to be with him but don't feel happy living with him while he is drinking, let him know he needs to quit or leave as you can't live with it. If he quits, that is fantastic. If he doesn't, he leaves. That is his choice. Either way you have stated what you can and cannot accept in your home with your child.

Trying to control his drinking will not work, it will just draw you into a codependent dynamic, the only person who can make him stop drinking is him.

sunnyday2022 · 23/06/2023 07:37

@SparklyShark thank you for your reply. His drinking varies. He generally drinks four beers most nights because that’s my boundary. He has one, or two nights per week where he has more and I’m not lenient. I just go to bed early and he’ll sit up and listen to music. He also does pot multiple times per day too which I make him do outside the house.

I’ve heard of that group, his step mom recommended it to me, but haven’t been able to get to one because of my baby and not being able to find care, but as he’s get older this does become easier.

I think you’re right re: long term problem. His last relationship broke up because I think he would get too drunk and not be able to control himself. I think this surprised him. He then asked his dad if he felt he’s a handful after some drinks and his dad didn’t disagree. He then introspected and decided to attend AA based on what other people thought, rather than a realisation.

exactly that, resentful of anything that hinders his ability to get in the way of a good time, or a buzz. Whilst he loves us, we just are not enough to keep him from that lifestyle. I’ve tried to be understanding and tell him to go and blow out with friends every couple of weeks etc. I also said I could tolerate a beer, or two on a sunny evening, but anything more than it’s quite frankly boring company. He doesn’t think he’s got a problem; which is the problem. It’s that bad that when his family last visited from US we went for a cream tea and he ordered a beer… I’ve had conversations about what’s appropriate etc. he’s the only one that drinks in a social situation and then pressured others. We had some friends over last weekend and he made it all about the beers and letting loose. I understand to a degree because of British culture, but I don’t enjoy it. I don’t drink at all, mainly out of respect for my body and not enjoying the feeling. I did used to drink when I was younger and going out with friends like uni age…

I’m actually reading a book on co-dependency at the minute. How do you think trying to control someone’s drinking habits could lead to co-dependency?

he told me the only things that makes him happy is alcohol and his bubble. He doesn’t think we are compatible and to be honest. If I set that boundary, I don’t think he would give a damn. I’m trying to figure things out as I’m financially dependent on him at the minute with my young baby. I don’t want to leave, but this doesn’t make me happy. I want more from a human being. He’s horrible when he’s had a drink and says it my fault. I feel like completely withdrawing and not giving him anymore of myself… I feel like just buying him 3 crates or beers and whisky and just saying go crazy…

OP posts:
SBHon · 23/06/2023 07:55

I’ll eventually have to leave
I’d be getting rid of eventually in that sentence.

He’s not parenting his own child and he’s not supportive (or even particularly caring) to you. These are the two basic things required of a father and a partner.

He’s causing you more upset than happiness, and moreover your son is witnessing it all. I know what I’d do in that situation.

SparklyShark · 23/06/2023 08:37

To me this is quite a significant alcohol problem. I'm not an expert by any means but have read a lot of books about alcohol and addiction in general. The reason I am saying this is a serious problem is not just because of the quantity or frequency of his drinking. It's because his addiction means that alcohol has become the focal point and crept it's way into every area of his life. Part of addiction is the fact that the addict continues with the behaviour dispite negative effects. This is affecting multiple relationships, parenting, socialising. It is also not the case that he just simply doesn't get that his drinking is not appropriate, or that it is a cultural thing. Yes I agree that alcohol is pervasive in society and socially acceptable to a degree, but that is just one thing which helps him stay in denial. That thing about the only thing that makes him happy is drinking - that is a big red flag. That is the neurobiological and psychological impact of alcoholism. It impacts your brain chemistry, and your reward centres. Basically, alcohol makes you feel good temporarily, then quickly the body responds to compensate which makes you feel worse. Ultimately he is drinking to relieve the negative impacts of having consumed alcohol. It's a cycle. That's part of what alcohol does, and why it is so addictive.

In my opinion, this isn't a reflection on you or your baby in any way. It's not that he can't ever find happiness and fulfilment in any other way, just not while he is psychologically dependant on alcohol. But in order to do that, he would need to confront his alcohol issue, get sober, and work to rebuild himself psychologically. At the moment he is basically at the total mercy of the biological effects of alcohol, and until he accepts that, it will remain the case.

The thing about alcohol and his bubble is very concerning. Someone said that in the end the addict finds himself alone in a room with a bottle, and no one left around him. Mentally he is already heading in that direction. In my opinion the choice for an addict is a) you can have the substance or b) you can have everything else in life. You can't have a and b. They can't coexist in the long-term. But it is for the addict to realise and accept this themselves, confront this. That needs to happen in order for change to occur. Some reach that point and overcome addiction, some do not.

The reason why I am saying that controlling his alcohol intake will not help is because the number of drinks he takes is only an outward symptom and effect of a deeper psychological and biological problem - his addiction to alcohol. Alcoholism isn't just about the amount you drink. It's about the impact drinking has and it's about continuing to do it when it is causing problems. Limiting his drinks will not solve that problem, it will just draw you into the drama and unhealthy psychological effects which alcoholism has on those around it. Lots of people call alcoholism the family disease. This is because of the serious impacts that living with an addict have on the psychology and wellbeing of others. We get drawn into roles and play a part in the addiction, partly due to the feeling that they can/should control or cause or change the addictive behavior. This leads to all kind of psychological distress and keeps us also locked into the addictive cycle. I am not great at explaining exactly how this happens, but I think the AlAnon website will probably have quite a lot of information and advice which explains this better than I could. They may also have online meetings.

The fact that he has lost relationships in the past due to drinking, has previously attended AA, and that his stepdad is recommended AlAnon are all big indications that this is a long-term problem. He is an addict who has returned to a state of denial. This was the case before you met. It will remain the case until he takes responsibility. That may never happen. And ultimately that is his journey.

As you mentioned, he has not listened to your boundaries about the level of drinking you are comfortable living with. He has probably taken the fact that you go up to listen to music as a sign that he can simply continue to drink and you will accept it. He is already on that path to bring the addict alone in the room with his bottle. Only he can make that choice between a) and b).

Which in my opinion leaves you with two choices about your own life and wellbeing. A) decide that you can live with his addiction and the fact that he may never come out of denial, and may continue to sink in to addiction - and accept that you can't influence this either way, or b) decide that you can't live with someone in active addiction and let him know he can clean up totally and get help, or leave.

The point of option b) isn't to shock him into sobriety. It is to set a strong boundary and make a choice about what you accept as your life and relationship. If he goes, he goes. If he stays and gets sober, great. Either way you are stepping off the 'merrygoround' of addiction.

I feel terrible for you as it must be awful going through this as a young baby. I just felt I needed to post, as from your OP I felt that there were a lot of red flags about how far his addiction has progressed psychologically. As you mentioned, it has gone so far as to impact his ability to be a good father, partner and family member. And still he persists and stays in denial. Only he can change that.

SparklyShark · 23/06/2023 08:42

*go through this WITH a young baby.

SparklyShark · 23/06/2023 08:44

For context, I am an alcoholic in recovery. I fully accept that my choice is between a) drink, or b) everything else in life. That is my chance at recovery.

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