4 bottles in one sitting...need help!!

[Scoley76]

Hi. Well where to start......
I have a problem with drink! Drinking up to 4 bottles of wine at a time maybe 4 times a week. I have drank more tbh but generally it's between 2- 4. I have a partner and a beautiful 7 year old boy who just doesn't deserve this. Today it has to change and I'm hoping using this forum will help. I've lied, covered up and spent hundreds of £££s. Has anyone got any tips to achieve what seems like a mammoth task? xx

Why a GP though, who is a generalist with 10 minutes to spare? Why not an alcohol advisor, who is an expert, and can arrange detox if needed, and give ongoing support, and could have been contacted last week?

Thank you so much xx

Again thank you all for the advise and support. It is really helping. I got through a Saturday night too....woohoo.
Feeling good this morning but the challenge is on. OH has gone to work this morning and doesnt return until tuesday. It's a long time and gives me opportunity to sneak, hide and deceive.
I'll be focussing on my beautiful 7 Yr old son who doesn't deserve any of this and I'll be continuing to post and be open. Wish me luck xx

@Sarahcoggles gives really, really good advice. (I didn’t know you could self refer to alcohol services!). @Scoley76 can you try to self refer as @Sarahcoggles suggests? I would do this asap.

It’s great you didn’t drink last night (well done!!!) but this is a long process and you need help. You are extra vulnerable with your OH being away and so is your small child. There is no way you can be a responsible adult 4 bottles down and you know it. Again I’m not judging but I am urging you to seek help, for yourself and for your child.

Please don’t go cold turkey if your husband is away and you’re in sole charge of a child…

Did you google alcohol addiction services in your area? You can often self refer.

I'm honestly feeling OK. I'm feeling abit emotional and didn't sleep well last night but apart from that I don't feel so bad. I will speak to the gp on the 7th (my appointment)and last time they game me a service to ring. I just can't remember the name of it or I'd have looked it up.
The most important thing is that I'm feeling positive I can do this....I haven't felt like that for a long time. Again thank you all for ur time and concern xx

The name of the service they mentioned will be your local alcohol service who will be who the GP refers you to. You can find out the name by googling alcohol service + your area.

You can't do it on your own OP. You need to go to AA. I haven't had a drink for 10 years now. I dont have alcohol in the house. AA saved my life.

Can the alcohol addiction people refer you for tests? I have no idea about that, but obviously a GP can take bloods and refer for an ultrasound, then to a specialist doctor if necessary. I see (well, speak to) a gastroenterologist every 6 months, and get routine ultrasounds to check for liver cancer or a worsening of my condition. I get no treatment other than that, but would if it were necessary. It gives some reassurance that if I stay sober I will be ok.

Obviously you may not need any of that, but it’s important that you get it if you do. By all means go to the walk-in place, but keep your GP appointment too?

AA is not for everyone. If you are not physically addicted (ie you do not drink because of withdrawal), coaching is an option. By managing your mind and your cravings and your desire you completely change how you drink. I see it as learning skills - skills to drink less. So many people drink out of pure habit or because they want to numb negative emotions. Others drink because they associate alcohol with reward/fun/relaxation. All of this makes sense when we learn how the brain is programmed. And it's all possible to change.

I don't believe alcohol has the power and I don't believe everyone has to give up completely and go sober (though many choose to).

So many people are afraid to give up/drink less because they think that life will somehow be a little less - even if they're having negative consequences. But life with less alcohol is more fun than you think. And that's why people coach with me to get freedom around it.

You asked for tips. Here are some to get started:

1. Get very very aware of your drinking patterns. When you drink, why, how you're feeling, who you're with... start to get curious about how the habit is unfolding. You aren't drinking without any reason. You just may not be aware of what those reasons are yet.

2. Drop any shame you have about this and give yourself a big hug. Decide to support and back yourself without any back chat. Be your biggest fan. And BELIEVE IT'S POSSIBLE for you to make the change.

3. Write out WHY you want to change this. Note: this reason has to be REALLY REALLY COMPELLING. It has to be more compelling in the moment than any pull to drink (ie I tend to find that "getting healthy" or "being a good role model to my children" rarely suffices when it's 7pm on a Friday and you're faced with a glass of your fave wine)

That's where I'd start. I have many more tools available but don't want to overcomplicate it at the start.

I also have a podcast called 90 Days Later, available on all major platforms. Start with the episode 'Why we drink'.

Happy to answer questions.

Hi @Scoley76 I hope the GP was able to point you in the right direction for getting some support, how are you feeling today? X

Hi, thanks for the reply. Yes the gp went great and i have a number for a support group. 10 days alcohol free today !!

That's brilliant Scoley - well done!

Fantastic. So pleased for you

Thank you xx

Hi op. Another ex drinker here. Was drinking a bottle of wine a night at least 5 nights a week. I have 3 young dc. I had always drank but in the last 5 years or so it had begun to take over my waking thoughts. Whether it was panicking with a hangover in the night when I couldn't sleep, shame in the morning that I'd drank the night before, planning my day so I knew exactly when would be the right time to suggest to dh that we get some wine (pre prepared with mental scripts for justifying it while trying to not look desparate). When i wasn't successful I'd find ways to gulp 2 quick glasses when I'd find a reason to be in the kitchen alone.

My life was becoming unbearable and having a df who died of alcoholism, I knew only too well the path I was already well on the way to treading

I had a nervous breakdown 6 months ago which a hangover triggered and was essentially catatonic for a week and unable to work for a month. I've not drank since and I wake up every morning in shock frankly that I'm alive and feeling normal people feelings like being just tired!

This is all to say you categorically can do this. I used to read people saying things like this when I was drinking and think they must be different to me there was no way I could stop. It wasn't true.

Seriously impressed you've taken the step to call the gp. In some ways that's the hardest part

@Scoley76 congrats on the 10 days!!!! Wow!
be sure to access that support group though, there will be bumps in the road and that voice of “moderation” will call you at times and you’ll need some support when that happens.
you are doing a great job! Keep going!

So pleased for you Scoley! Here's to another sober day, just focussing on one day at a time .

@Scoley76 I will be your buddy if you like . I am 63 days sober and doing AA.

Well done!

Set mini goals and reward yourself in non alcoholic ways. Maybe after 20 days get your nails done - using the money saved from not drinking-

40 days new clothes etc it is a big achievement!!

If you actually read the thread you would see that the OP is 10 days sober. She is doing very well.

Fantastic OP! Keep going, you can do this x

Aww well done 😊 keep it up! X

How are you getting on OP?